Forever With You
by fanficanonymous
Summary: *Story 3 to Lexi series* Now that Jackson has her he's determined to spend forever with her. Lexi realizes she can't live a life without Jackson. The two have grown to depend on each other fully, love each other wholly, trust each other completely. Jackson had everything planned out to the last detail, his forever after with Lexi. But, nothing could have prepared him for this...
1. Chapter 1 - Forever

**Chapter 1**

_Forever – August 23, 2013_

_Lexi_

My god, I'm so nervous. My palms were sweating I had to keep wiping them off on my shorts. I couldn't sit, so I paced the lobby instead. It's the longest we had gone without each other _while_ things were good, it was pure _torture!_ He told me that everything went smoothly, I was so happy for Bree. I couldn't wait until they got here so I could spend more private time with Kali.

I saw his plane touch down and I thought my heart was going to blow right out of my chest. God, I wonder if he was as nervous as I was. I really missed him while he was away. The house is too god damn big for just one person. I paced and paced until I saw his plane come to a stop. The minute the door opened I saw him practically jump off the plane, my eyes almost popped out of my head watching him be so reckless! What if he got hurt?! I took one last look at my appearance. I decided on wearing a little white crop top, with a pair of high waisted cutoff denim shorts. I pushed my white Chanel clutch/satchel out of the way and watched as he ran up the steps to the lobby. Where are his bags?! I couldn't help but giggle, now knowing how much he must have missed me too. He just confirmed it for me.

I smoothed my hands down my shorts waiting for him to come through the door.

* * *

_Jackson_

It has been five _excruciatingly long_ days since I last saw Lexi. Everything went perfectly in Kali's custody hearing. Her parents' request in regaining custody was denied, as we already suspected, and the judge granted Bree six months homestudy with Kali. She'll be her foster mom during those months and will file the necessary paper work to adopt Kali when those months are up. I made sure to get court ordered permission to fly Kali and Bree out to stay with us for a couple of weeks before I left LA. I wanted everyone there with us when I proposed to Lexi. We'll know whether the judge approves or denies sometime in the next two weeks. The lawyers assured us not to worry, all I have to do is plan and plan carefully. Lexi deserves _everything_.

I couldn't sit still I unbuckled my seatbelt the minute we touched down. The stewardess, Mary, kept eyeing me nearing a heart attack. I could tell she wanted so badly for me to keep my belt on but she wouldn't dare open her mouth to say anything, given this is my fucking plane. I felt the plane slowing down and come to a complete stop. The stewardess walked over to release the lock on the door and I jumped out of my seat flying past her. I ran down the steps, once I felt the concrete beneath my feet I sprinted toward the lobby. The minute I swung the door open I heard her, she must have seen me running because she was giggling like a little girl.

I turned to see her, _my_ Lexi. I felt my breathing return to a slow steady pace at the sight of her, she looked beautiful. "Are those shorts?" she nodded grinning from ear to ear, her eyes were sparkling. _Thank God!_ "Come here, baby!" I held my arms open and watched her run to me laughing and squealing. Our lips crushed together the minute she jumped into my arms, she wrapped her legs securely around my waist. Our kiss was urgent. Like we were making up for the past five days we spent apart. My hands started roaming across her back, down to her ass, then back up again holding her by the nape of the neck.

"Don't leave me here alone, ever again!" she whispered against my lips, wrapping her arms tighter around me.

"Never…" I answered. "I missed you so much, baby."

"I missed you too, Jax. Take me home." She whispered, trailing her kisses down my neck. She brought her lips back up to my ear, "I need you to fuck me." she said biting my earlobe.

I groaned. "_Fuck,_ Lexi!" I started carrying her toward the exit. "Did you drive or did Daniel drive you?"

"Daniel drove me." she winked.

"Good." Daniel was waiting by the car and greeted me when I stepped outside with Lexi still in my arms. "I will _double_ your pay if you get me home in five minutes!" I got into the car and slammed the door shut with Lexi giggling in my ear.

We couldn't keep our hands or lips to ourselves the whole way home, I couldn't wait anymore or I would explode. Daniel opened the door for me and I got out carrying Lexi up the steps.

"Where's Amanda?" I stepped through the door setting her down.

"Not here." She smiled up at me.

I tore at her clothes and she helped me with mine, leaving a trail to our bedroom. "Baby, you look beautiful." I trailed my eyes up and down her perfect body, her sandy brown hair falling just below her breasts.

She bit her lower lip holding her arms out to me. "Make love to me, Jax." I quickly closed the distance between us until her lips were against mine again. I stepped forward leading her toward the bed. Once I knew we were there I picked her up gently laying her down and watched as she spread her legs for me.

I propped myself up with my arms at the side of her head, looking down into her beautiful eyes kissing her perfectly plump lips. I positioned myself at her entrance and saw her eyes flutter open to look at me. "Don't look away. Keep your eyes on me, baby." She nodded and I eased myself into her, groaning, I started to move. Her soft moans of pleasure filled my ears and it completely consumed me. "God, baby! I really fucking missed you!" I whispered, my voice straining from the feel of her tightly wrapped around me.

"I missed you too, Jax!" she whimpered wrapping her legs around me, moving her hips up to meet mine. I reached down cupping her breast pushing up, taking her nipple into my mouth. She cried out, arching her back further into my mouth. I groaned at the taste of her flesh and started to pick up the pace. "Oh, God!" she moaned.

"You like that, baby?" I gripped her waist and pounded into her harder.

"Yes! Jax! God, YES!" she shouted. I continued to slam into her, watching her climbing higher and higher.

"Come for me, baby!" her body submitted to my command as she let herself go, crying out my name. I followed right behind her finding my release. I leaned down, propping myself up on my arms and covered her face in kisses before collapsing completely, burying my face in her neck. "Fuck, babe." I rolled onto my back. "I am never leaving you again!"

* * *

_Lexi_

"I have a surprise for you." I said with a smile resting my chin on his chest.

"Was this not it?" he laughed when I smacked his chest.

"No, pig!" I got up tying the sheet around me. "Come with me." He got up pulling on his briefs and took my hand.

"Where are we going?" he asked curiously.

"Just out to the living room," I led him to the piano and sat down. "Sit." I patted on the spot next to me on the bench.

His eyebrows shot up. "Are you going to sing for me?" he smiled.

I bit my lip my hands skimming across the keys, playing a random melody. "It was really hard being away from you. I played a lot while you were gone." I looked at him, sadness lingering in my eyes for just a moment. "One day while driving to school, a song came on the radio. A song I completely forgot about, it used to be my favorite. But, I realized it was the second part to the original, the lyrics are slightly different from the first version. I really feel it was written for you, Jax." I smiled looking down at the keys. "I remembered crying so much when I heard it playing, so I made a mental note to sing it for you when you got back."

"Play it, I want to hear." He whispered, his eyes filling with so much love.

I nodded and transitioned into _our_ perfect song.

The day we met  
Frozen, I held my breath  
Right from the start  
I knew that I found a home for my  
Heart beats fast  
Colors and promises  
How to be brave  
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall  
But watching you stand alone  
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer…

I have died everyday waiting for you  
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you  
For a thousand years  
I'll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still  
Beauty in all he is  
I will be brave  
I will not let anything take away  
What's standing in front of me  
Every breath  
Every hour has come to this

One step closer…

I have died everyday waiting for you  
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you  
For a thousand years  
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you  
Time has brought your heart to me  
I have loved you for a thousand years  
I'll love you for a thousand more

* * *

_Jackson_

I reached up wiping the falling tear from her cheek. She turned to me with a smile and I couldn't control the wave of emotions that took over me. I took her face in my hands and kissed her with everything I had. My heart was beating so hard and fast it started to hurt, the amount of love she has for me is really astonishing. _Why me? What have I ever done to deserve her?_

"I love you." I whispered pressing my forehead against hers. "I love you so much, it scares me." I felt her tear drop, sliding down my hand.

"I love you, too. I can't live without you, Jax." She whispered back to me. It took me by surprise. I knew she loved me but she's never said _that_ to me before, I was always the one to tell her that. I felt tears stinging at the corner of my eyes, pulling her back in to kiss me again. I increased the pressure of the kiss, pressing her lips harder against mine.

"That's _our _song. From now on, that's _our_ song." I pulled back with a smile. "Thank you…for sharing that with me, Lexi. Who's song is that?"

"Christina Perri." She answered softly with a smile. "I love her. The lyrics to this song were just so perfect for you…"

"I agree, very much." I leaned in to kiss her again. My smile slowly fell and I grew serious, looking into her eyes. I reached brushing her cheek with the back of my finger. "I don't deserve you…"

She jerked her head back staring at me. "Stop saying things like that, Jax!"

"I _don't…_"

"Says who?!"

"Me." I looked at her. "But, I don't care. I'm selfish with you, and I know it. I love you too much, it makes it hard to care when I love you this much."

"You're ridiculous. I don't belong with anyone else but you. I'm yours forever, Jax." She looked me in the eyes. "Say it."

"I'm ridiculous, you belong with me. You're mine _forever_." I whispered stroking her cheek with my thumb. She pulled me into her arms, holding me tight.

_Forever with Lexi._

_ I can't wait…_


	2. Chapter 2 - Favorites

**Chapter 2**

_Favorites – August 23, 2013_

_Jackson_

"Why do you love me?" I asked. We laid together in bed tangled up in each other. I was playing with her fingers, interlacing them with mine. She looked up at me bunching her brows together. "I've never asked you before. I would like to know." I explained.

"Because you're hot." She laid her head back down on my chest. I dug my fingers into her ribs and she started screaming. "Ok! I'm sorry, don't tickle me, Jax!" she surrendered.

"Tell me."

"Well, I gave you the gist of it that night in my condo. When we decided to be honest with each other, do you remember?" she rested her chin on my chest looking up at me.

"Of course I remember." I said smiling.

"Well, those were just part of my reasons. My feelings for you run really deep, Jax. I love you because of how big your heart is." I looked at her puzzled by what she had just said. I wouldn't say that about myself at all. "You don't know it, you don't _see _it. But, I do. The things you would do, the extent you would go to, _just_ to make sure I am always happy." She shook her head. "God, I didn't know a person like you existed." she smiled looking off faraway. "Your love for Ellie, your commitment to her, your _loyalty_ to her is what I love about you. It helped me realize the type of lover you are. When you love, you fall hard, you love deeply. That person becomes your whole world and you would do anything, drop _everything_ to make your person smile. Eli loved me, I know he did. But, the minute we had a bad argument, he ran off to seek comfort elsewhere. When I get mad at you, when we argue…you stay and you fight for me. Your persistence is really something, Jax. With you I feel like no one else exists but me, I feel _safe_ with you. You are my _forever_." She smiled laying her cheek against my chest. "I know how much it must have hurt you to lose the two most important people in your life. I can _only_ imagine the level of how much you must have grieved your loss. I'm just so thankful that you fought through it. I know there were a lot of times I wanted to die and follow Eli to heaven. I can't imagine what you must have felt." She placed her hand above my heart. "Your heart is bigger than you think Jackson Michael Anderson, don't let yourself forget it. I love you, I love your heart, and I love that you gave it to me so willingly, trusting me not to break it. I love_ you_, so very, very much."

_Marry me…_

_Marry me…_

_Marry me…_

I wanted to say it so bad but I bit back. She deserves more than just a blurt-out proposal with no ring. I will give her everything. For the rest of her life, I will stop at nothing to give her the world.

"Does that answer your question, Jax?" she asked softly.

"Do you know how happy you make me?"

She shrugged. "I'm awesome, what can I say?" she winked.

"I'm serious. I've never felt this way…about _anyone_. That's what I struggled with the most during the beginning of our relationship. The intensity of my feelings, the literal _need_ to be around you just to be able to breathe…I've never felt that way before and it made me feel extremely guilty, I felt I was betraying Ellie and I really struggled with it."

"Why did you pursue me as hard as you did? I'm just curious. If you felt such a struggle, wouldn't it have made sense just to back off?" she asked curiously.

"No." I shook my head.

"Why?"

"I felt…like I was a part of you somehow." I scratched my head trying to find the right words. "Or you were a part of me somehow. Either way, I couldn't control anything I was doing anymore. My body was no longer _my _body. I felt such a strong pull to you, I can't explain it. Like I needed you to _survive_, if that makes any sense…Every time you walk away from me, I die a little inside. It feels like my heart is being ripped from my chest and I literally _can't _breathe, Lexi. When you left me, I wanted to die. I mean it literally when I say I can't live without you, baby." I pulled her closer to me.

"You can't say things like that to me, Jax." She wrapped her arms tightly around me.

"I tried to drink myself to oblivion that night. Did you ever listen to my messages?"

She nodded her eyes filling with tears. "I couldn't call you. I needed you to move on."

I shook my head. "To who exactly? To _what?_ I am nothing without you, Lexi. You can't leave me again."

"I didn't know you'd look at our connection that way, I thought it would _hurt_ you when you found out." She buried her face in my neck.

"It hurt _me_ because it hurt _you_." I rubbed her back gently. "But, no problem will be big enough. _Nothing _can or ever will keep me from you."

"I know that now." She whispered.

"Good. I love you, Lexi."

"I love you most, Jax."

"No way." I laughed shaking my head.

"Way." She pinched me.

I laughed pulling her back down to me. "Talk to me, babe. Tell me about school." I tightened my arm around her.

"So much fun! I forgot how much I loved school, I really missed it."

"You were a nerd in high school, weren't you?" I asked laughing.

She giggled. "A nerdy prom queen? Sure!" she shrugged.

"You were prom queen?" I asked not surprised.

She nodded proudly. "I was! I was also cheer captain at my school." My eyes almost popped out of my head.

"Oh my God, please tell me you still have your uniform."

"Don't be creepy!" she pinched me again, giggling.

"I'm sorry, but I would kill to see you in your cheerleading uniform, baby."

She shook her head. "I could show you pictures, but that's about it. What about you? Did you play anything in school? What were you like?"

"I played basketball."

"Figures, with your height." She nodded. "Did you like it? How come you don't play anymore?" she frowned.

"I did. But, I just grew out of it, I guess." I laughed. "I don't have time for it anymore. I got too busy."

"You have time for me though." She pointed out.

"Yes, and it will stay that way. I'm not going to leave you hanging to go put a ball through a hoop, that's fucking ridiculous."

"Then piano is your only hobby?" my smile fell a little and Lexi smacked her head. "I'm so fucking sorry. Never mind." She apologized.

I laughed pulling her hand down from her head, rubbing the spot she hit. "Stop. I'm slowly starting to get over that. I played for you, remember? And it wasn't that bad. It hurt a little, yeah…But, it felt good to play again. I might start again."

She nodded. "I'm glad to hear that, Jax." She said with a smile.

"Can you let me in on why it hurts you so much?" she asked eyeing me warily.

"My baby kicked for the first time while I was playing."

Her eyes watered over and she planted a soft kiss on my chest. "What did you play?"

"Yiruma, River Flows in You." I answered with a sad smile.

She smacked her head again. "My GOD! Are you kidding me? I'm such an idiot! What are the chances of that, seriously?" she asked in disbelief.

I pulled on her hand again. "Stop doing that, you're going to leave a mark." I rubbed the spot again. "I liked playing for you, don't worry."

"You were crying, Jax." She said softly. "When you played for me, you had tears in your eyes. I didn't know why then, but now that I know…I feel so bad."

I shook my head. "I needed to start again at some point. You were the only one that could get me to do it. I'm not sorry at all." I smiled leaning in to kiss her softly on the lips. "Next question."

She looked at me and laughed. "I'm sorry for all the questions. I just want to get to know you better. We haven't taken the time to _really_ get to know each other, you know?"

"I understand. Shoot!"

She nodded. "Favorite color?"

"Red. You?"

"Green! Favorite movie?"

"Die Hard!" Easiest question by far. "You?"

"The Departed! Fav—"

"Wait what? Seriously?" I was certain she'd say a chick flick.

"I told you, Leo's my kryptonite! And have you seen it? It's fucking _gangster! _I _love_ it!"

"I love you." That's the thing with Lexi…Never a dull moment. She's not your typical girl, and I love that about her.

"I know. Favorite song?"

"A Thousand Years by Christina Perri." I winked. "You?"

"Me too!" she smiled. "Favorite holiday?"

"Christmas." I answered. "You?"

"New Year's!"

"Why?" I asked.

"You get a clean slate. A do-over." She smiled. _Interesting_. "Favorite flavor of ice cream?"

"Mint chocolate chip." She made a face, crinkling her nose. I laughed. "What's wrong with that? What about you?"

"Cookie dough! Mint and chocolate together…just blech!" I laughed at her reaction. "Favorite school subject?"

"History." Again with the face, I laughed. "You?"

"Math!"

"Why?"

"Math doesn't lie! Numbers are numbers!" I laughed, interesting thought. "I'm running out of favorites." She frowned.

"Favorite month out of the year?" I asked.

She bunched her eyebrows together. "October!"

"What? Why?"

"I don't know…" she frowned. "It was the first thing to come out of my mouth!" she started giggling. "I never stopped to think what my favorite month was, that question kind of caught me off guard!"

She's _so_ cute! "Lucky number?"

"Seven!"

I shook my head. "_So_ typical!" I laughed.

"Shut up! What about you?"

"Eight."

"Why?"

"It was the day I met you…May 8th, 2013." I kissed the center of her palm.

"Enough with the game, we can play later. Make love to me, Jax." She pulled me on top of her.

* * *

"Back to our game." She said with a smile taking another bite of her ice cream.

I nodded. "Ok. Do you have any more questions though?"

She sat thinking for a minute. "Favorite food? Do you have any?"

I shrugged. "Not really, I'm not too picky. Steak, maybe?"

"Such a manly answer!" she said laughing.

"What about you?"

"All things pasta!" she smiled.

"So you must like Italian food a lot then?" I asked.

"Pretty much!" she answered laughing. "But, I'm not that picky either, I'll eat whatever."

"Favorite dessert?" I asked.

"Cheesecake! You?"

"Apple pie."

"Oh my Gosh, that sounds really good." She pouted.

"I can have Amanda make you some tomorrow." I pinched her nose.

"Your favorite moment with me?" she asked in a more serious tone.

"When you sang for me, the first time, and I heard you tell me you loved me back." I kissed the back of her knuckles. "I was so scared to tell you I loved you, I didn't know how you'd react to it. But, you said it back. I thought I was going to pass out." She nodded, her eyes far off, recalling the memory of that night. "What about you?

"The night you came back for me…" a tear slid down her cheek. "I was sure we were done. It hurt me so much to push you away. I wanted so badly for you to leave me alone, I knew then that I wasn't too far from breaking down and giving in. But, when I saw you at my door that night…I was _so_ happy. That's what I love so much about you, Jax. You never give up on me. You're so determined to keep us together."

"We belong together, Lexi." I rubbed my thumb across her knuckles.

She nodded. "I believe we do."

"Forever?"

"_Forever_." She looked up at me smiling, her tears twinkling in her eyes.


	3. Chapter 3 - The Ring

**Chapter 3**

_The Ring – August 24, 2013_

_Lexi_

I woke up in a Jackson-less bed. I called for him but he didn't answer. I checked the closet then I checked the bathroom, no Jackson. _Where the hell was he?_ I walked out of the room stepping into the living room.

"Jax?" _nothing._

I walked down the hallways calling him again, I got no answer. I headed to the other side of the house searching the rooms, no luck. I walked toward his study and finally heard him. He was talking to somebody. I heard no voices other than his so he must be on the phone. I got closer and pushed the door open stepping inside. He turned to see me and rushed off the phone.

"I gotta go, I'll talk to you later." He hung up. _Strange_. "Good morning, baby. How'd you sleep?"

"Fine, I was surprised to find you were gone. What are you doing? Are you working?"

He shook his head. "No, I was just talking to Nick…"

"Something wrong?" I asked concerned.

"No, no it's nothing like that, babe. He was just…catching me up." He smiled lightly.

"Ok…? Well do you have to go in?"

"Yes, for just a couple of hours. I needed to go over some stuff with him. I missed a lot while I was gone."

I felt a little disappointed that he had to go back to work as soon as he got back, but I smiled instead. I didn't want him to worry. "Ok, maybe I'll call Harper and we can—"

"NO!" I looked at him shocked, my eyes widened at his abrupt change in tone. He realized it too and changed it immediately, speaking softly. "Like I said, I was on the phone with Nick. She isn't feeling too well, that's why I'm going in. He needs to take care of her, but he left a few documents unfinished. I need to go in to review and sign off on everything."

"If she's sick then I should go check on her." I said worried. "I can't even remember the last time she was sick. I've been such a bad friend I'm going to call her."

"Lexi…"

"She's my best friend, Jax. She's my _sister_." I walked away taking my phone out of my pocket to dial Harper.

"Hello?"

"Harper! I heard you were sick, are you ok?"

"Yea?" she sounded confused.

"Well, what's wrong, Harp? Tell me, I'll bring something over to you. I need to know what it is in order to get the right medicine!"

"Nick already got me something, babe, I'm good I don't want to get you sick. I'll see you when I'm better. I want to get some rest, I'm so tired. I'll talk to you later, Lex." She hung up.

_What the hell is going on?!_

I walked back into the study to find Jackson texting. I marched up to him yanking the phone out of his hand.

"Lexi, what the hell?!"

"Something is going on with Harper, you're acting _weird_! You tell me, what the fuck is going on?!" I looked down at his phone to see who he was texting. _Nick_. My body relaxed a little and I handed him back his phone. "I'm sorry."

"What's wrong, Lexi?" he looked so worried.

"You guys are just acting really bizarre and it's unsettling. Harper _never_ turns down my company, I don't understand…"

"She's sick, baby…"

I nodded. "I'm sorry. I'll just work on homework or something, I guess." I said softly before walking away. _Something still felt a little off. _ I shook the thoughts out of my head and headed toward the room.

* * *

_Jackson_

"I could kill you for forcing me to lie to her!" Harper's tone was threatening.

"I'm sorry, she walked in while we were talking what was I supposed to do?!"

She sighed heavily. "I've never lied to her before, Jackson."

"Yes, I understand. But, at least it's for something good. Are we still on?"

"Yea, what's the plan?"

"I will come pick you up and we will head over to the Harry Winston Salon in Beverly Hills together." I said.

"Sounds good, when should I be ready by?"

"I will be there in like 30 minutes." I looked down at my watch.

"Ok, I will see you then." She hung up.

I headed back toward the bedroom to check on Lexi, I had to make sure she was ok before I left. I walked in to find her on her laptop on our bed. I leaned against the doorframe knocking lightly on the wall. She looked up to me with a small smile.

"Hey." Her voice was quiet, distant.

"Hey, baby. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine, Jax. I'm just going to work on a couple of assignments while you're gone." She said looking back down to her computer.

I walked over to the bed grabbing the laptop from her setting it aside. Sitting down facing her I took her hand opening it up, kissing the center of her palm. "I love you, baby." Her eyes softened at my touch. "I'm sorry I have to leave you today, I know I just got back. But, I won't be long." She looked sad again, but nodded in understanding. I leaned in to kiss her and felt her hands cradling my face, stroking my cheek.

"Hurry home to me." she pulled back with a smile.

"Of course." I leaned in for another kiss. "I'll be home as soon as I can. I promise."

* * *

I walked up the steps to Harper's front door and rang the bell. She came running out pulling me along with her toward the car.

"Harper, what the hell?"

"SHHHH! I never told Nick, I don't want him asking me where I'm going. I don't like lying to my significant other!" she said a little too sarcastically.

I narrowed my eyes at her and got in. "Why haven't you told him?"

"Are you kidding? He would slip, and then I would be forced to kill him."

"Fair enough." I laughed getting into the car.

* * *

It took us thirty minutes to get to the salon. "Welcome, my name is Nancy! How may I help you today?" an eager saleswoman greeted us. She looked from me to Harper and back to me again. She recognizes me. _Shit._

"We're here to look at your engagement diamonds."

"Oh, how precious. How long have you two been together?" I looked at her, blinking in shock and Harper almost keeled over, laughing her ass off.

"Me and him? No." she held up her left hand pointing to her ring. "Already got me one!" she smiled proudly.

"My apologies!" she looked so nervous. "I didn't mean to assume…"

I held up a hand. "Really, it's fine. I need to look at your engagement rings, please." I repeated. I didn't have time for this shit, I wanted to get started.

"Of course, right this way." She started walking to the other side of the salon, and we followed close behind.

She pointed to a glass case holding all the diamond rings and Harper almost pressed her face against the glass to get a better look. She carefully ran her eyes up and down, side to side. She looked like she was studying for an exam, it made me laugh.

"Are you ok, Harper?"

"SHHH!" she held a hand up to my face. "This is a _process_, Jackson! You can't rush this. She will wear this ring for the _rest of her life_, do you understand?"

"Uhhhhh, yes? Harper, I wasn't rushing you—"

"SHHH! Oh my fuck!" she paused when one caught her eye. Right when she was about to point I stopped her.

"Let me look first. I want to be the one to choose. You're here to _help_ me, Harper." she opened her mouth to say something but I cut her off. "SHHH!" her eyes widened at my imitation of her.

"But—"

I shook my head. "You never know. We may be thinking of the same one." I turned my head to look back down at the case, my eyes skimming over their selection. Then I found it. "That one." I pointed.

"THAT'S THE ONE!" Harper exclaimed smacking me on the arm.

Nancy smiled broadly pulling it out setting the black display pad in front of me. "Excellent choice!" she said pulling it out handing it to me. "The 5.02 carat Classic Winston Oval Diamond completed with tapered baguette side stones on a platinum setting."

"Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God! She is going to _die!_ This ring will completely dominate her whole hand, it will make a statement!" Harper was jumping up and down.

"That's what I was going for. I want the world to know she belongs to me."

Harper clutched her heart and Nancy looked at me sighing. "She's one lucky girl!"

"Not even close. He's the lucky one." She nudged her with a wink. "Why do you think he's getting such a huge rock? She's way out of his league!" she was grinning from ear to ear.

"It's true…" I looked at Nancy with a smile. "Harper, what's her ring size?"

"Five! Will that be a problem? What size is this one?" she asked.

"This one is a six. It won't be a problem to resize. We'll get it done for you as soon as we can." She reassured us.

I shoved my hands in my pocket and looked at Nancy, all business. "Nancy."

"Yes?"

"Do you know who I am?"

She blushed. "Mr. Jackson Anderson. Yes, we were told you were coming in today."

"This must never get out. If it does, I will know who leaked the story. I will make sure you are held responsible if this gets out before I get to ask my girlfriend." I said sternly.

Her eyes fluttered nervously as she processed what I just told her. "Yes, of course, Mr. Anderson. Not a word."

I nodded handing her my card. "Call me as soon as the ring is ready." She nodded taking it. "And Nancy?" she looked up at me again. "I'm trusting you with this. It's very important things go as I plan."

She nodded again. "Yes sir."

"Let's go, Harper." She quickly followed me out the door.

"What's your plan?!" she asked as we got into the car.

"I don't know yet, I'm still trying to work it out. I just know that however it goes down, my family will be here. I'm flying them out in a couple weeks. I have to come up with a reason why they'll be here though. I'm sure I will come up with something."

She nodded. "What about with the press?"

"After she gives me her answer I'll handle it accordingly. When she says yes I want to come out the proper way. I don't want them bombarding us or anything, I will agree to an interview of my choosing to do a piece on me and Lexi. I want us to officially come out to the public so they'll stop with the ridiculous questions."

She nodded. "Good. Does she suspect anything? How was she when you left the house?"

"She was acting a little weird. I think she knows that I'm lying about _something_ she just doesn't know _what_." I sighed. "She seemed a little upset. When she left the room to go and call you, I had a feeling she would check my phone when she got back so I renamed your contact name on my address book to Nick's name." her eyes widened. "When you turned down her company it only confirmed her suspicions that things were off. She came marching into the room snatching the phone from me, but thank God, by then everything had already been changed and she believed I was texting _Nick_."

"Jesus FUCK, Jackson!" she yelled. "She's upset. I'm going to text her and set up a date to see her. Maybe that'll relieve her stress a little." She suggested.

I nodded. "Yeah…Maybe, you should."

She pulled out her phone and started texting her.

"Text her in the car, I need to get back as soon as I can." Harper nodded and got in. I pulled out of the lot and sped toward her house.

* * *

_Lexi_

I looked up at the clock to see that it was 1:30. Jackson had been gone a little over two hours, he should be back any minute now. I powered down the laptop and looked out the window, such a beautiful Saturday. I'd hate to waste it sitting inside the house, so I decided to lay out by the pool. I walked over to the closet stripping down and changed into my hot pink bikini. I grabbed a towel and threw on my sunglasses heading out the door. Laying the towel across the lawn chair, I laid down on my stomach and started flipping through a magazine.

"Babe?" I looked up to find Jackson standing by the glass doors with his hands in his pockets. He walked over to where I was and knelt down beside me. "You look beautiful."

"Is everything ok at work?"

He nodded. "I'm sorry I had to leave." He apologized again.

I shook my head. "It's ok, I understand."

"Do you mind if I join you?"

"Be my guest. It's your pool." I said flipping through the magazine.

He grabbed the magazine from me and I looked up at him. "_Our_ pool. Are you ok, baby? Do you want to talk?"

"No." I reached for the magazine and started flipping through again.

He sighed, standing up. "I'll be right back." He returned a few minutes later in nothing but his black swim trunks. It took me a minute to avert my eyes. I could never _not_ stare at his perfectly sculpted body. He caught me staring and smiled down at me. "Come swim with me, babe." He reached his hand out to me.

I stood up and saw him giving me a once over. I smiled at his expression as he realized he recognized the swimsuit. I led him to the pool and stepped in, taking each step one by one. His hand gripped my sides and he turned me around to face him.

"I recognize this swimsuit." He leaned in closer.

"Yea?" I looked down, shrugging my shoulders, pretending not to notice.

He leaned in to kiss me softly on my lips walking me back toward the wall of the pool. "I remember the picture you sent me, teasing me like you always do, when I was miles and miles away. You're telling me you don't remember?" he asked skeptically. I shook my head. "Liar." My breathing picked up, my breaths shallow, as he undid my top. "I asked you not to wear it in public. Did you?" he reached down cupping my breast in his hand, teasing my nipple between his fingers. I nodded. "It drove me crazy being so far away from you, not being able to touch you, and _knowing_ other guys would be looking at you." He pulled the strings undoing my bottoms, and slid his fingers into me, moaning softly I leaned my head back against the wall. "I touched myself to your picture, imagining it was you tightly wrapped around me. It wasn't the same, nothing will ever come close to your touch." he grabbed my waist picking me up and lowered my hips down to his until he was buried deep inside of me. He groaned burying his face in my neck. I reached up grabbing a fistful of his hair and pulled hard moaning into his ear. He started to move, sliding himself in and out of me. Telling me how he felt during our first time apart was incredibly arousing. My whole body felt like it was on fire, I couldn't take it. "I wanted so badly to hear you moan, screaming my name." his voice was now a harsh rasp as he continued to drive into me, mercilessly. I reached up behind me grabbing the wall, biting my lower lip to keep from screaming. "Let it out, baby. Let me here you!" he whispered roughly into my neck, I felt his tongue as he ran it across the flesh along my neck.

I cried out, screaming. "Jax!" he groaned again slamming harder. "I can't take it anymore!" I dug my nails into his back.

He smiled down at me, his eyes gleaming. "Do it, baby!" I raked my nails down his back and he tossed his head back, clenching his jaw tight, groaning. "I love you, Lexi. So fucking much!" He hissed through his teeth.

"I love you most, Jax." I whispered, panting.

A low growl escaped his throat as he picked up his pace. "Tell me who you belong to, baby!" I felt myself creeping closer and closer toward the edge.

"I'm yours, Jax." I whimpered. His mouth crushed against mine kissing me feverishly, my lips would surely bruise.

"Come for me, baby!" he whispered into my ear. My body submitted to his command, as it always did. A series of screams and moans escaped my lips as I rode through my intense orgasm. "Fucking beautiful." He firmly gripped my waist as he drove into me a final few times before finding his own release. I felt the tiny explosions shoot through me, felt him throbbing inside of me, he buried his face in my neck trying to catch his breath. I wrapped my legs tighter around his waist, pushing him further into me, not wanting to waist a drop of him.

And just like that, the reasons for my being upset earlier just seemed so irrelevant. Forgotten. I could never stay mad at him for too long.

"I love you…" he whispered kissing me softly.


	4. Chapter 4 - Emotional

********** Note: I have updated my FF profile adding a link to a pinterest thread I have created for this series. The thread includes my inspirations while writing these books. From clothes, cars, homes and even the characters, they are all in that thread. Feel free to take a look! :) ************ **

**Chapter 4**

_Emotional – August 30, 2013_

_Lexi_

I collapsed on the couch as soon as I got home from class. The day felt really long, I don't know if it was because it's Friday or if it was just me. I had a lot of cramping and my breasts were unusually sore. I felt so tired and exhausted I could barely concentrate in class. It was really hard to hang on to _anything_ the professor was saying and now I'm worried about our upcoming exam. I let out a deep sigh burying my head in the couch cushions.

I didn't even know I fell asleep until I felt Jackson's lips on my forehead. Blinking my eyes open I looked up to see him smiling at me. "What time is it?" I groaned.

"It's a little after 7. How long have you been sleeping here?" he looked down at his watch.

"I got home around 5." I mumbled sleepily.

His eyebrows bunched together. "Did you eat anything before taking your nap?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Lexi…" he sighed. "Get up. Where's Amanda?" he asked looking around.

"I don't know. I literally just collapsed on this couch as soon as I walked in, Jax."

She showed up on cue as soon as her name was mentioned. "Good evening, Jackson." She greeted with a warm smile. She looked over at me and laughed softly. "You're up! You were out cold, Lexi. You must have been really tired, I tried to wake you."

I slowly sat up, stretching. "I was _so_ tired! I'm sorry, Amanda." I apologized. I looked over to Jackson, "I couldn't stay awake in class today. It's so unlike me, I couldn't concentrate on a god damned thing." He looked at me with growing concern.

"Is it me? Am I keeping you up?"

I shook my head. "No, no, it's not you." How could he be keeping me up when he wasn't even here? He hasn't really been home. I've been seeing less of him because he has been held up at work a lot lately.

"Are you sure, babe?"

"Yea." I smiled softly. "I think it's just being back at school. All the assignments and stuff." I shrugged. I stood up giving him a hug and quick kiss. "I have to pee."

He chuckled. "Ok, hurry back. You need to eat!"

"Yes, daddy." I said mockingly, which resulted with a smack on my ass.

"Don't start." He warned. I rubbed my butt, scowling while he just laughed.

I noticed the smell of Amanda's homemade lasagna coming from the oven. Normally I would have been so excited, but today I just had no appetite. "Can I just have a salad? I'm really not hungry, I don't feel very well." I said rubbing my stomach, the cramps weren't going away.

"No, Lexi, you need to try and eat something."

"But…"

"Just _try._"

I sighed walking over to the bathroom to pee. When I got back Amanda had already dished our plates and set them down on the bar. Jackson was waiting for me while checking emails on his phone and smiled when I sat down.

"Anything pasta, right? You love lasagna, babe."

I decided to humor him and just nodded with a smile. "Yea…"

"Lexi, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'll eat." I picked up my fork and took a bite. It was good, I just wasn't hungry. "How was your day?" I asked trying to shift his attention to something other than me.

"It was really good, actually. We're taking on a major project, which is perfect to train Nick on."

"Really? It won't be too overwhelming?" I asked raising my eyebrows.

"Well, it will. But, because of the stress coming from this huge project, he'll know what to expect from any of the smaller projects coming after this one." He explained. It made sense. I know he wanted to train Nick until he was fully comfortable to run the office with him barely being there. He ultimately wanted to just work from home, I loved the idea _obviously_.

"What's the project?"

"We have a major client, James Henderson, I did a previous casino project with him before in Las Vegas and now he wants me in on this project to build the hospital that he and a handful of other people are investing in." I looked at him confused.

"Casino to a hospital? That's a major difference. Is he a doctor? Or is he a gambler?" I picked at the edges of my lasagna.

"He's a _businessman_. He loves to invest, this man shits money."

I nodded laughing. "I see."

"He has made me a really wealthy man. This project is huge. It'll be big for Nick, too. I want him to show everyone what he can do. A confidence boost is just what he needs. He's smart but it seems like he has no idea just how smart he is. He freaks out on me a lot." He laughed making me laugh with him.

"Yes, he definitely does freak out a lot. Probably because Harper is just _that much_ in control most of the time, he may feel like he needs that around him all the time. She has a _strong_ head on her shoulders, Jax. I love that girl to death." I giggled. "He's definitely smart though." I agreed. "I wouldn't recommend anyone else as your right hand man."

"Lexi, you haven't touched your food." I looked up and he looked back at me disapprovingly. "What's the matter? Are you sick?"

I shrugged. "Maybe, I really don't have an appetite, Jax. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, I just thought maybe if you ate something it might help." He rubbed my back gently. "Do you need to lie down? Want to see a movie? Tell me what to do, so I can help you." He looked to me for answers but I had none, I had no idea what my problem was. "What about a smoothie? I can make you one if you want? If you can't eat anything, maybe that will help. Or maybe ice cream? I can go out and grab you some. Cookie dough, right?" he was borderline freaking out and I burst into tears. "Fuck, baby! What did I say?" he jumped up cradling my face in his hands.

I shook my head. "Nothing, you didn't do anything. You're being really good to me, just stop. I don't know what I need right now. Your questions are overwhelming me!"

He held me against him trying to soothe me. Placing a hand up against the nape of my neck he held my head to his chest and the other one securely wrapped around my back, rubbing gently. I felt myself calming down and pulled away, wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry." I sniffed. "I don't know what the fuck that was about." I got up off the stool and headed to the bedroom. He was just a step behind me following me to the bathroom, leaning against the doorframe watching me splash water on my face. He looked after me with a troubled look on his face, loosening his tie.

"Baby, I want to help. What's wrong? Did I do something?"

"No! I told you I don't know, Jax. I think I'm just stressed out, don't worry about me." I wiped the water off my face with a towel and walked out of the bathroom.

"How am I not supposed to worry? You're not acting like yourself."

"I'm sorry, I said I was sorry!" I kept snapping at him, I don't understand why. His eyes changed, he looked sad. I wanted to reassure him that everything was ok, but I just walked away. Telling him I was ok wasn't working for me so far.

"Lexi, please, talk to me."

"Jax, just _stop!_ Please, just stop! I'm fine." I headed toward the door.

"Where the hell are you going, Lexi?!" he shouted after me.

"Away!" I shouted back.

He sighed out of frustration following me. "Don't walk away from me, Lexi."

"Stop following me, Jax!"

"I know you, you're going to lock yourself in one of these rooms and I'm going to have to break the fucking door down. I'd rather skip that and have you talk to me, baby." I kept walking toward one of the spare bedrooms while he followed close behind me. "Just stop for a minute!" he grabbed my elbow.

"Let me go!" I yanked my elbow out of his grasp. I walked into the spare bedroom and swung the door shut behind me. He stopped it with his hand and walked in after me. "God damn it, Jackson!"

"Why are you shutting me out? Tell me what's wrong so I can _fix_ it!"

I wish there was a reason but there wasn't. I'm so confused I didn't know what to say. "Just _leave me alone_, Jackson!"

"FUCK NO, that's not an option!"

He shouted so loud I jumped and started to cry again. I knew how frustrated he must be, but it still hurt all the same. "I want to go home."

"This is your home, Lexi." He said slowly.

"To my condo." I choked out. "I need to be alone."

* * *

_Jackson_

"You're insane if you think I'm letting you walk out that door."

"I'm insane because I want to go home?" she looked at me like I was crazy.

"Lexi, for the _last_ god damn time, _this is your home!_" I shouted again. "Please, just tell me what I did! Why are you trying to run from me again?!" I felt the warm tears stinging my eyes. "Is it because I'm working too much? I'll cut back! I'll cut back, Lexi. I'll drop the deal with Henderson if that's what you want." My voice was full of desperation, I was begging. This can't happen to me again. The night Ellie left me we argued about the Henderson deal, I can't let Lexi walk out that door. _I can't._ "I'm sorry, for whatever it is that I did. I'm sorry!" I felt a tear rolling down my cheek as I made my way over to her. I sank down to my knees in front of her, wrapping my arms around her waist. "Just stop, _please_. Don't leave." I whispered.

I felt her kneeling down next to me, her eyes wide. "Jackson, I'm not _leaving_ you. That's not what I meant, _at all_!" Shock and guilt were trapped in her eyes, they started filling when she saw my own tears resting at the rim of my eyes. "I'm sorry if it came out that way, I really am. I just wanted to be alone tonight, that's it. I don't know what my problem is right now, I'm scared. I just wanted to clear my head, _alone_. I'm getting mad for no reason, crying for no reason…I guess I just wanted some time to recollect myself." She wiped away my tears, eyeing me carefully. "What was that? Where'd that come from, Jax?"

"The last time I worked on a project for Henderson was the last time I saw Ellie. She was leaving me when she got into that accident. I was working way too much, I told her I was training Brad, that was the deal, and at the time I _was_. He was getting the hang of it, doing a really good job. But, Henderson wanted _me_ on the job, so it was hard to back out of. She completely snapped and she left, and I never fucking stopped her like I should have." I whispered looking down at my hands, letting the tears fall.

"Oh my God, babe." She gasped. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry." She pulled me into her arms. "I'm so, so sorry. I'm sorry." She cried burying her face in my neck.

I wrapped my arms as tight as my arms would allow without completely crushing her. "Just don't leave me." I whispered, breathing her in.

She shook her head covering me in kisses. "I told you I wouldn't. I _won't_, Jax. You never have to worry about that." She leaned in to kiss me. "I'm sorry, baby, I'm really sorry." She breathed.

I increased the pressure of the kiss, no matter how much I tried, I didn't feel close enough. I tore at her clothes and laid her down on the carpet, after unzipping my zipper and adjusting my pants I slammed into her without thinking about anything but being inside of her. I _needed_ her so bad I couldn't think of anything else, she felt _so_ good around me. _Fucking Christ, I can't live without her. _There was nothing but desperation in my love making, I wasn't going to last very long. Judging by the level of her body's response to me, she wouldn't either.

"Oh God, Lexi! I love you so fucking much!" I grabbed her legs wrapping it around my waist, slamming into her again and again.

"I love you too, baby!" she had tears rolling down her cheeks. "_I love you so much._"

I leaned in propping myself up with my arms at the side of her head, looking into her eyes I wiped away her tears. "I'm close baby, come with me. Are you ready?" she nodded. I got up again grabbing her by her hips. "Come for me, baby!" I came apart the minute I heard her screaming my name, clenching tightly around me. I drove myself into her one last time before I completely let go, emptying myself inside of her. "Lexi…_fuck!_" I leaned in covering her in kisses. "I love you, baby."


	5. Chapter 5 - Idiots

***** Don't forget to check out the series Pinterest thread in my profile if you haven't already :) *****

* * *

**Chapter 5**

_Idiots – August 31, 2013_

_Jackson_

I watched as she slept so peacefully in my arms, I woke up about 30 minutes ago but didn't move in fear of waking her. She has been different lately, distant. Was it something I did? Is it something I can fix? The fact that her change in behavior is happening while I'm planning the rest of our lives is wildly unsettling. I couldn't lose her, I _won't_. I decided to be extra careful and to pay more close attention to her from now on. With her going back to school, added stress is the last thing she needs in her life. I just wish I knew what was going on, the argument we had yesterday completely shook me up. The thought of not being able to hold her, to see her smile, to hear her laugh, to feel her breathing next to me every day…it was just too hard to bear.

I saw a strand of her beautiful sandy colored hair fall down past her eyes and I reached up to brush it away. She stirred a little and I froze. She blinked her ocean blue eyes awake and looked up at me with a smile. _So beautiful_. She groaned rolling over to her other side.

"Good morning, baby." I reached over wrapping my arm around her waist.

"No." she groaned burying her head under the pillow.

A low chuckle escaped me as I got up to head to the bathroom. I picked up my toothbrush squeezing a bit of toothpaste onto it and started to brush my teeth. She wrapped her arms around me and planted a soft kiss on the back corner of my right shoulder sending tingles down my spine. She smiled up at me before popping her own toothbrush into her mouth.

"How'd you sleep?" I asked with my mouth full.

"Good enough." She answered. "What are we doing today?"

"Wanna have Harper over? I have to see Nick anyway."

Her face lit up and she started smiling like a little girl at the mention of Harper's name. She rinsed out her mouth and looked back up at me. "Yes, I would _love_ that!"

I rinsed my mouth out, setting my toothbrush back in its place. "I thought you would." I leaned in kissing her softly on the lips. "Go give her a call. Nick already knows he has to be here. We are just going to go over a few stuff about the Henderson deal." I looked at her warily. I was still paranoid about deals with Henderson, he was good luck to me in terms of wealth, but I couldn't help but feel he was also a curse.

She reached up to cradle my face in her soft hands. "I don't mind the Henderson deal, don't look at me like that when you mention him. It's your _job_, Jax. I wouldn't come in between your work, it's important to you, I know." She stroked the right side of my cheek with her thumb and I leaned into her touch, kissing the center of her palm. My hands found their way to her hips and I gripped down tight, pulling her to me.

"Not important as you, _nothing_ is." I whispered softly. "If all this becomes to be too much for you…You _need_ to let me know, baby. I will drop everything to be with you."

"I know you would, Jax. But, that's not going to happen. I understand when work needs you to be there, you need to be there. Plus, I'm buried neck deep with school. I'll be fine." she rolled her eyes mentioning school.

My face hardened, growing serious, I looked into her eyes. "Leaving this house, leaving me here, is no longer an option. You live here now, this is your home. We will argue, we will fight, but you need to let them play out. Argue _with_ me, fight _with_ me…Don't push me away, don't walk out on me when things get a little bumpy. I understand you don't want to say what you don't mean out of anger, but I can take it, as long as you don't walk away, I can take it. Do you understand me, Lexi?"

Her eyebrows pulled together as she stood there staring into my eyes. "Jax…"

"I'm serious, Lexi. _Please. _Give me this one, it's all I ask." I whispered. "You scared the shit out of me yesterday, I don't know what that was, but I don't want to ever see that happen again. Just tell me what I want to hear." I pressed my forehead to hers. "Do you understand me?" I repeated.

I felt her head nodding in understanding. "Yes."

Pushing her hair from one shoulder to the other, I bent down to kiss her neck. "I love you. You will never know just how much…"

She wrapped her arms around my neck, holding me tight. "That's where you're wrong, Jax. Because I love you just as much, if not more." She sighed into my neck.

_She couldn't have been more wrong. No matter how much she would try to understand, it will never come close. No matter how much she thinks she loves me, I will always love her more. I understand now why I was put on this earth, and I understand how I was able to go on after losing Ellie and our baby. I never really understood the concept of 'meant to be', but now I do. I was meant to meet Lexi, meant to love Lexi, to be with Lexi. My life was __**all things**__ Lexi. She was my world, my everything, the reason for my existence…Loving her was as easy as breathing, and without her I would die._

* * *

_Lexi_

"Hello?" Harper answered sleepily into the phone.

"Wake up sleeping beauty! Come over so we can lay out by the beach."

She groaned. "What time is it?!"

"Like 9 in the morning, it's not that early." I said laughing.

"Like hell it's not! I'm going back to bed!" she whined.

"Wake up right now and come over with Nick or I'm coming over and dragging your ass out of bed, sleeping _bitchy_!"

"Ugh, I hate you." She grumbled.

"I love you too. I will be expecting you in an hour." I hung up with a smile.

I loved that Harper always let me have my way. I should let her win some but not today, maybe some other day. Harper's company is just what I need right now, she always knew how to put me in a good mood and I was in desperate need to smile.

"What was _that_?" I looked back to find Jax with an amused expression holding two mugs in his hands.

I laughed shaking my head. "Wake up call for Harper." I took the mug from him gratefully. "Mmm, thank you." I said taking a sip.

"You forced her out of bed?" he asked surprised.

"Yes, of course. Why not?"

He looked amazed. "I just, I guess I'm really not used to anyone telling Harper to do _anything_." He shook his head slowly. "But, then again, if anyone can get anybody to do just about anything it would be you. You'll make a great lawyer one day, Lexi." He said with a laugh.

I smiled proudly up at him. "Yes, of course I will. Speaking of lawyers, I have a lunch date with my father on Monday." I remembered.

"Oh?" his eyebrows bunched together. "Where at?"

"I'm not sure yet, I'm sure he made reservations somewhere. The plan is to meet him at the office and then head out to lunch. I haven't really gotten a chance to see him after school started back up, I think he really wants to catch up, see how I'm doing." He nodded his head slowly looking about a million miles away. "Are you ok?"

He snapped out of it looking back at me. "Yea, I'm fine." He gave me a small smile. "When will they be here?" he asked looking down at his watch.

"I told her I'd expect her in an hour. So, around 10-ish." I shrugged. "Why, what's up?"

"Are you hungry at all? Or would you rather wait for them to get here?"

"Let's wait and do lunch together out on the patio, it's so nice outside today. You have the perfect view of the water, it'd be a waste to just sit around inside." I said looking out the glass walls.

He walked up kissing my forehead. "Whatever you want, baby. What would you like? I'll go tell Amanda."

"It doesn't matter, I'm anything but picky." Truth is I have no appetite. But, I'm not going to bother with that again.

We sat together on the bed, both on our laptops, checking emails while waiting for our favorite couple to get here. He tangled his feet in mine playfully I looked up to find him smiling down at me. I shook my head with a smile and looked back at the computer screen trying to concentrate on the email my _Contracts_ law professor sent out to his students this morning. That is until Jackson grabbed my laptop from me tossing it to the side.

"Play with me." he adjusted his position so he was down by my feet. He pulled hard on my ankles so I slid down to a laying position.

"Jackson!" I squealed, giggling. "I was checking on an email from my professor!"

"He can wait, I can't." his lips smashed against mine. His hands slipped under my shirt making its way up, gently cupping my breast. Freeing it from my bra he started teasing my nipple between his fingers and trailed his kisses down my neck. I couldn't help the soft moans that escaped me, but then again I never really could whenever Jackson Anderson laid his hands on me. His hands trailed back down to grab my thigh, pushing my legs apart as he settled in between. I felt him, hard against me. Moaning again I fisted his hair in my hands intensifying the kiss pushing my hips up into his, wrapping my legs tightly around him. A low growl came from within him vibrating straight through me as he picked my hips up grabbing my shorts getting ready to pull them down. Then the doorbell rang…

"_Jesus_! Harper and her fucking timing…" his voice was a harsh strain, whether it was due to frustration or pain, I have no idea. I started giggling again as I got up to adjust my clothes, he did the same. He took a deep breath in before standing up.

"I'm sorry." I mouthed apologetically before he opened the bedroom door.

We stepped into the living room just as Amanda opened the front door to greet Harper and Nick. Harper had a huge pair of sunglasses on and she looked like she had a really bad headache. Poor Harper, she really wasn't a morning person, it was 10 o'clock and you'd think most people were up by then, but not Harper. She was more of a noon person.

I grinned from ear to ear and approached her, arms wide open. "Harper!"

Nick rolled his eyes and shook his head. "She's in a mood." He said under his breath as I passed him. She turned to kick him in the ankle, he cried out hopping on one foot clutching his tender ankle.

"Never with me." I whispered back to him.

"Hey, babe." She greeted me with a warm smile, returning my hug.

Nick looked on at our friendly exchange with a clear expression of disbelief crossing his face. "I got about 5 punches in the arm, 3 pinches on my sides, a smack on my chest and a kick in the ankle to get her in the car this morning. And Lexi gets a hug _AND_ a smile?" he argued to Jackson. Jackson wisely stepped back with his hands up shaking his head.

"I don't operate without coffee and food in my system this early in the morning, my dear fiancé." She turned to glare at him and he quickly bit his tongue. "Point me in the direction of the food." She turned to me again. I pointed out to the patio and she smiled reaching her hand out to me. "Let's go make me happy."

I laughed taking her hand as she led the way toward the food, looking back to make sure Jackson and Nick were following us. I saw Jackson patting him on the back trying so desperately to stifle his laughter but failed.

Harper's mood lightened up a bunch and she was a whole new person once she got coffee and food into her system. She and I talked animatedly about what we have missed in the time we didn't spend together while Jackson and Nick were deep in conversation about the business. Nick was catching him up on the details about the Henderson deal and the other projects the company was currently working on.

"Wanna head out to the beach now?" Harper asked leaning in.

I looked down at my watch, 11:45. "Yea sure! Let's go." I got up and Jackson turned his head to look at me. "I'm going down to the beach with Harper. I'll leave you boys to it." I leaned down kissing him on the cheek but he pulled me right back for a real kiss.

"Don't be too long, I'll miss you." He whispered.

"I'll miss you too." I smiled against his lips seeing Nick roll his eyes in the corner of my eye. I pulled back and headed toward the bedroom to change and Harper followed close behind. I had so many bikinis I could barely keep track. I ruffled through to pick the one that best suited my mood today when I came across my favorite one. _Jackson's favorite one_. I smiled heading to the bathroom to change and came out to find Harper on the chair by the window flipping through a magazine.

"Ready?" I asked.

"Yep!" she tossed the magazine back down on the coffee table and stood up taking off her cover up exposing her brighter-than-the-sun yellow bikini, stuffing it into her beach bag. "Let's go get our tan on." She said walking out the door.

We walked through the living room, heading for the front door. The boys were in the study discussing projects and looking at blueprints. Harper and I popped our head in for a quick greeting.

"Bye, we'll see you soon!" we said at the same time.

"Lexi!" I jumped and tried hurrying for the door when Jackson caught my elbow. He gave me a once over, his jaw tightening. "I asked you not to wear this one in public." He whispered to me. I looked over to see Nick had walked over to Harper picking her up in his arms, saying their goodbyes.

"Jax, don't be a child. I have already worn this in public, I had no problems before." I pulled my arm from his grasp but he didn't let go.

"How about a cover up then?" he tried to negotiate.

"I told you already, a cover up would defeat the purpose of getting a tan if half my body is whiter than the other." I reached up brushing his cheek with my hand. "Get over it, Jax. I _love_ this suit." I winked walking out the door.

"Harper, you _watch_ her like a hawk!" he ordered as she walked out the door after me.

"Don't I always?" she said over her shoulder.

"God, help me." he slammed the door shut and we burst into a fit of giggles.

"So, how have you been, my dear friend?" Harper asked laying on her front crossing her arms on the towel in front of her, resting her chin on her forearm. I did the same and pushed my sunglasses down to shield my eyes.

"I'm ok." I attempted to be vague, but that never works with Harper.

"Tell me."

I sighed. "I've been a real bitch lately, Harp."

"HA! Impossible."

"I'm serious, I feel so bad for Jackson to have to put up with me. It's ridiculous!"

"You're probably just stressed from school, babe. I'm sure you have missed out on a LOT of sleep and you and Jackson are living together now. I'm sure you _barely_ sleep!" she waggled her brows at me, giggling.

I laughed with her resting my chin on my arm again. "You're probably right. He has been held up at work a lot lately though. He's so stressed he will let me down because of the time we're losing together, but that's just crazy!" I shook my head.

"He's crazy about you, Lex. He loves you _so_ much." She rubbed my arm gently. "You need to understand where he's coming from, he has already lost someone important in his life."

"Since when did you jump ship to join Team Jackson?!" I asked with a smile.

She jerked her arm back looking at me like I was crazy. "Don't even joke about that, you know I am and _always_ will be Team Lexi! Crazy girl." She crossed her arms in front of her again.

"I really love that you two are getting along again." I sighed with a smile. "You have no idea how much that means to me. If you guys couldn't find it in you to get along, I don't know…I can't even imagine it." I shook the nasty idea out of my head. "How have you been?" I asked changing the subject.

"I've been good, Nick has been really busy, now more than before." she shrugged her shoulders. He loves his job though, and I don't mind being alone so I don't bother with it."

"That's good, high-in-demand men like ours need the support of their women." I winked at her. She nodded with a small smile. "Did you guys set a date for the wedding yet?" I asked.

"Yes, it's not official just yet until we have the save-the-dates printed. But, I think we're going for a winter wedding. December 21st, hopefully." She answered.

"Harper, that's awesome! You guys have been engaged forever, it's time to jump the gun! You kept him waiting long enough!" I laughed.

"Yea, he's been giving me so much crap about it. I just want it to be perfect." She giggled. "I love that man, so much." She had a huge I'm-so-in-love grin on her face and I couldn't help but smile.

"You two are the best. I can't wait to see you walking down that aisle, Harp."

"That reminds me. I have to officially ask you!" she sat up excitedly, and I followed, clapping my hands like an idiot. "Lexi Isabelle Moore, will you be my maid of honor?"

I squealed in delight. "Hell yeah!" I clapped again reaching over to hug her. We started giggling and shrieking when I noticed a shadow blocking my sunlight. I looked up to find two random guys smiling down at us.

"You two ladies here alone?" they looked like frat-douches with their blonde hair, tanned skin, toned abs and perfect straight, white teeth. Once upon a time I would have given them a few minutes of my time but Jackson made these guys look like little boys in comparison. I found them appalling.

"Now why would you automatically assume that? She's my lover." Harper said draping an arm over my shoulder. This was interesting. I didn't object though, instead I just followed her lead hoping they would leave. But, it just intrigued them even more.

"Please tell me you swing both ways." The other one sounded hopeful.

Harper scoffed. "You idiots! Are you seriously—"

"What's going on here?" I stiffened at the sound of Jackson's voice behind me. I turned around to see he and Nick had changed into swim trunks and had now joined us out on the beach. Both of their faces hard, eyes cold as ice, they stared the frat-douches down. Their presence was very intimidating compared to these little boys. "Is there a problem, baby?" he asked never breaking eye contact with the idiots.

I stood up in case he decided to attack. "Nope, they were just lost." I said as idiot #1's eyes did a quick appraisal of my body, Jackson's hands balled into fists.

"You really shouldn't leave your girl alone out on the beach. Especially looking like that." He dared to say. Jackson's jaw clenched tight and the look in his eyes were something I have never seen before. He reached out grabbing me, tucking me away behind him and Nick tensed up right next to him. These guys were going to get a good pounding if they didn't walk away right now.

Harper laughed hysterically. "Oh, honey. Alone or not, your attempts to woo us would have been a waste of time, you two couldn't handle us _believe me_. Sorry, but walk the fuck away!" she said through gritted teeth.

He let out a low chuckle turning around. "Whatever, bitch." He said under his breath, shaking his head.

Harper kicked the back of his legs sending him to his knees and then kicked him square in the back. He landed face first into the sand. "Eat shit!" she spat out. "Don't you ever fucking call me a bitch, how did you see this panning out anyway? What, you thought we'd head back to your place and screw your brains out? How pathetic are you?"

Idiot #2 just stood there stunned. He watched Harper, eyes wide and helped his friend up. Idiot #1 spit the sand out of his mouth and glared at Harper, then looked to Nick. "Keep a leash on your _bitch_ next time!" he growled. Harper took a step forward, lashing out at him again but Nick reached out tucking her behind him so she was standing next to me now. I've never seen Nick this angry before, his eyes were menacing. Jackson stood like he was ready to jump in the minute fists would fly. Nick walked up to the ballsy frat-douche and looked him straight in the eyes, the guy started backing down but it was too late, Nick was beyond pissed. It all happened so fast when Nick's fist connected with idiot #1's nose sending him back down into the sand.

"Call my fiancé anything less than honorable again and you are dead, motherfucker. Do you understand me?" his breaths came out harsh as he tried to reign in his temper. "You're lucky I don't fucking kick your ass out here for the whole beach to see. But, I'll save you the embarrassment. Walk the fuck away." He said each word of that last sentence slowly. The guys started backing away slowly, idiot #1 holding on to his blood gushing nose.

Everyone's attention were shifted to us now, staring open mouthed, whispering back and forth in hushed tones, pointing, some were laughing. Jackson's arm was still wrapped around me protectively, keeping me behind him. Once they were out of sight both men turned to check on us.

"Are you ok?" Jackson's hands were gently cradling my face.

"Yes, they didn't touch me. Nothing happened, they were just trying to pick up the wrong girls." I shrugged.

The anger returned to his eyes at the thought. "I _told_ to wear a cover up in public. God damn it, Lexi!"

"It would have happened regardless of what she is wearing, Jackson!" Harper jumped to my defense, pulling Nick's hands from her face. "Don't yell at her."

"I'm not." He said closing his eyes, taking a deep breath in, and then opened his eyes again looking back at me. "Will you just listen to me next time?" he pleaded, his thumbs gently stroking my cheek. I nodded, silently. There wasn't much else I could say, he _did_ warn me, I couldn't argue with him now.

"I'm so sorry."

A small laugh escaped him. "For what exactly?" he asked.

"Defying you, going against your wishes…All you ever try to do is protect me. I'm an idiot." I looked down but he lifted my chin up so we were looking into each other's eyes.

"Protecting you is my job it's what I'm here for. But, don't apologize to me about that. That's ridiculous. Whether you were out here in this bikini or covered from head to toe in a sweater and pair of jeans, this would have happened. I promise you that. This isn't your fault, Lexi." He pulled me into his arms and cradled my head into his chest. "As much as I would love to blind every bastard who takes a look at you, I can't. But, that doesn't mean I can't try." He smirked at me. "That's why the thought of you out here wearing close to nothing drives me crazy. Because there's little to nothing I can do about all the wandering eyes." He looked around again to make sure no one was ogling my goodies.

I looked over to find Harper in Nick's arms and shifted my attention back to Jackson. I laughed lightly shaking my head. "You men with your women…Like _cavemen_. We aren't fragile beings, Jax. We won't break. You don't have to stress yourselves worrying about us all the time." I reached out cupping his cheek.

"Lexi, that's like commanding water not to be wet. I will always worry when it concerns _you._ You should know this by now." He leaned in wrapping his arms around my waist, kissing my shoulder.

* * *

The rest of the day was much less with the drama and more with the fun. We enjoyed dinner together, laughed and enjoyed more than a fair share of wine, talking more about the upcoming wedding. I looked around the table at the people most important to me and I realized I have never felt so complete in my life. A feeling of euphoria washed over me and I felt my eyes filling with tears. If time could just freeze right here, right now in this moment. That'd be just fine with me.


	6. Chapter 6 - With Me

**Chapter 6**

_With Me – September 2, 2013_

_Jackson_

"Weekdays have come to be much more bearable with you living with me now." I smiled pulling her closer to the edge of the counter.

"Jax, don't move me, I'll cut you!" she screamed, razor in hand.

"I'm sorry, you know it's hard for me to keep my hands to myself." I kissed her softly on her nose leaving a little dab of shaving cream behind.

She wrapped her legs tightly around my waist trapping me against the counter. "Behave! I don't want you walking around with an ugly scar on your face." she scolded.

I ran my hands up her thighs. "This works for me, too." I grinned pulling the tie on her robe free. I sucked in a little breath of air, groaning at the sight of her. No matter how many times I see her, I could never grow to get used to it. My heart will still beat uncontrollably fast. "God damn it, woman…You will be the death of me."

"You are impossible! Jax, hold still!" she giggled.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from her underwear, wanting nothing more than to rip it apart. "How much time do we have?"

"None." She said sternly. "Don't even try, Jax. I will be late!"

I gripped the sides of her panties in my hands before she batted them away. "Lexi!"

"Jax?" she retorted.

"Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack." She ran the razor across my cheek one final time before running it under the stream of water.

"You want me to go the whole day feeling like this?"

She giggled. "I'm sorry, Jax. I just don't have the time for that this morning! And don't forget, I have a lunch date with my father today so I won't be joining you like I usually do." I hung my head back, _I forgot all about that_. She wet the hand towel and pulled my face back down to wash off the rest of the cream.

"I can't wait that long." I pulled at her underwear again. She hit my hand, hard.

"Jackson Anderson, I will hurt you!"

I buried my face in her neck. "Please?"

"No chance in hell, I'm already running later than I wanted." She looked down at her watch. "Get ready."

"You better be ready for me when I get home after work, Lexi." I turned around heading to the closet.

* * *

_Lexi_

I decided to wear a simple, half-sleeved, baby blue off the shoulder shirt with a pair of white shorts and white sandals. I didn't feel like dressing up, I felt really sluggish today. Jackson stepped out into the living room in a grey fitted suit, completed with a powder blue shirt and dark tie. He looked beautiful.

I smiled up at him. "Matching me like always, I see."

"Of course." He grinned, kissing me softly. "Ready?"

I nodded. "Yes, let's hurry." I picked up my shoulder bag and headed for the door. Daniel was waiting at his unusual spot and held the door for me to get in. "Good morning, Daniel." I greeted him with a smile.

He nodded. "Good morning, Ms. Moore." He returned my smile.

Jackson, unbuttoning the button on his coat, got in next to me pulling me close, kissing me gently on the side of my head. I yawned snuggling myself into him.

I heard him chuckling softly. "Tired already?"

"Yea." I frowned realizing how tired I've been lately. Maybe I need to start exercising again. Being with Jackson, I barely had any time for anything, it has been a while since I hit the gym.

He ran his hands along my arm. "How have you been feeling? You've been tired a lot lately." If it was to the point where he could notice, it was bad.

"It's probably because my workout schedule was thrown off after all the time we've been spending together these past few months. I think I'm going to start again, it doesn't feel too good feeling this tired all the time." I played with the frayed bottom of my shorts.

"What kind of workout?" he asked curiously.

"Yoga and I run…a lot. I run when I need to clear my head. You can only imagine how much running I've been doing these past few years." I continued playing around with the loose threads. "I know you work out, what does Jackson Anderson's workout plan look like?"

He made a face like he just realized how long it has been since he himself hit the gym. "It's been a while. But, I do a number of different things. Kickboxing, lifting, running, just a bunch of different stuff." _It shows_. "You know I have a home gym, you're welcome to use it when you need it."

I nodded. "I just might take you up on that."

"Do you mind if I join you?"

"Will you keep your hands to yourself?" I asked raising a brow.

"I can't promise that." He smirked.

"Then, no." I answered with a laugh and watched him frown.

"That's not fair."

"How is that not fair? How do you expect me to work out if you're going to sexually harass me the whole time?" he thought about it, no answer.

"I can't help my hands, Ms. Moore."

I laughed shaking my head. Then I felt the car come to a complete stop. "Alright, Mr. Anderson, this is my stop. Lay one on me." I pointed to my cheek. He turned my face toward his and kissed me. How he manages to pour all his love in one simple kiss, I will never know. His kisses always left me breathless.

"I love you. I'm going to miss you, baby." He ran his thumb along my lips. "Have a nice day, and make sure to keep your phone on you at all times." He instructed.

I kissed his thumb softly, "Yes, sir." I whispered.

He leaned in for one last kiss, "Get out of here before I change my mind."

"I love you, Jax. I'll see you at home." I hopped out of the car and blew him a kiss before heading into the building.

I checked my phone while walking out of my class. I felt it vibrate a couple of times during class but I didn't have a chance to check it with all the notes I was taking. They were from dad.

**Dad: Sweetheart, I am so sorry, I'm going to have to take a raincheck on lunch. But, I sent Kellan to pick you up and take you out to lunch instead. I know you're without a car today.**

**Dad: Forgive me. I will make it up to you I promise.**

I felt a slight panic creeping up on me, trying to text him back to let him know it was ok and that I would find my own way home I pulled out my phone. If Jackson knew I saw Kellan today without telling him he would freak. I decided to call him before texting my dad back, I dialed his number. Straight to voicemail. I felt the panic creeping in closer. I dialed his office.

"Mr. Anderson's office, Leah Jenner speaking."

"Leah! This is Lexi, I need to speak with Jackson, please!" my voice was urgent.

"Ms. Moore, Mr. Anderson is in meetings all day, I'm so sorry." She sounded distressed having to deliver the bad news. _Panic! I'm panicking!_

"Um, it's ok Leah. Please just let him know I called." I hung up getting ready to text my father to let Kellan know it wasn't necessary for him to come pick me up when I caught sight of his black BMW pull up in front of me. _PANICKING!_

He got out of the car with a smile. "Hey, you."

_Shit._

"Hey." I managed a smile. "Kellan, this really isn't necessary." I started to say. I remembered the last time I saw him, it wasn't a pleasant memory. I haven't spoken to him since, but Kellan being Kellan he greeted me as warmly as he would have any other day.

"Nonsense, Lexi. I'm happy to see you, I've missed you." He said it so normally. "Get in the car, let me take you to lunch." He held the door open for me.

"Kellan…"

"Lexi, it's just lunch, we used to do lunch all the time." His tone changed to a sad one. My heart clenched, and I automatically felt guilty for neglecting my good friend.

I sighed. "Ok." He shut the door after I was settled in my seat. _God, Jackson is going to kill me._

He got into the driver's seat seconds later and looked over at me. "Do you have a preference?" he asked with a smile. He always asked me whenever we did _anything_, it was always about me.

I shook my head with a small smile. "No."

"Ok, then my choice." He smiled pulling the car away from the curb.

The ride was pretty quiet most of the way, the music filling our awkward silence. I could tell he wanted to say something, I caught him opening his mouth a few times during the drive but words failed him. I hated this! I'm not used to feeling this awkward around Kellan. It was ridiculous, really.

"I hate this, Kellan." I broke the silence.

He exhaled softly at the sound of my voice. "Hate what?" he asked.

"This awkward _thing_ between us, I think it's complete bullshit!" I couldn't hold it in anymore. A mix of emotions ran through me, it felt weird, but I went with it. "Why were you so angry with me?"

"Not here, Lexi. I'd like to talk to you when we're seated where I can look at you." He answered quietly.

We rode the rest of the way in silence and he pulled up to the valet stand in one of our favorite French bistros, _Mon Amour_. He walked around to my side of the car to help me out and kept his hand on my back as we walked up to the restaurant. I didn't step away from his touch, it was agonizingly familiar, and I missed it. I feel nothing romantic wise for Kellan, but I do care deeply for him. The hostess greeted us with a huge smile on her big red lips. She looked Kellan up and down and looked away once she saw me staring at her.

"Dining for two?" she asked politely.

"Yes, under the name Cooper." Kellan never removed his hand from my back. I'm sure from an outsider's point of view we probably looked like we were _together_. We followed her to the table toward the back of the restaurant, no one else was around, which worked for us since we had to talk anyway. Kellan pulled out my seat for me.

"Thank you." I said politely taking my seat.

"Of course." He answered taking his own seat.

"So?" I raised a brow at Kellan.

"Lex, let's get settled first. I don't want to jump into it now and have you walk out on me. I don't want to upset you. I know you well enough to know you can't stand being in the same room as someone you're arguing with. I won't be able to take watching you walk out on me."

"I won't." he looked at me, unbelieving. "I _promise_." I reassured him.

"Well, what do you want to know? Where would you like me to start?" he asked.

"Why are you so against me seeing Jackson?"

"Are you really asking me that?" he looked bemused. He bunched his brows together, his jaw clenched down and he looked down at the table. "I _love_ you, Lex. Or have I not told you that already?"

Hearing those words again formed a bowling ball sized lump in my throat. "Kellan."

"Push it as far away from your mind as you possibly can, Lex. But, it won't change anything. I love you regardless. I don't care if you return my feelings or not, love isn't something I can control because it's inconvenient for you. There is no off switch for it, as much as you wish there was, there isn't." He looked pained, knowing that I was the cause of that made my eyes fill with tears, it tore me in half.

"Kellan, I'm sorry…" the tears started to fall. "I love you, I do. Just not in the way you need me to." I whispered. "I love Jackson, and I need you to be ok with it."

"Why do I need to be ok with that? Why is that so important to you? Do you have any idea how that makes me feel?" the waitress walked up just then, neither of us looked up.

"Um, I'm sorry, I can come back?" she asked awkwardly.

"No, you're fine, can I get a glass of your white wine, please?" I looked up wiping away my tears.

"Which do you prefer?"

"Doesn't matter, surprise me." Kellan closed his eyes, breathing in. I used to say that to him whenever he got up to get me drinks.

"And for you, sir?" she looked to Kellan.

"Same." He replied looking at me. She nodded and walked off.

"I understand how you must feel…"

"You don't." he cut in. "You have no idea. I would love to be able to just love someone else, someone who would love me back. But, it doesn't work like that. Life's just not fair that way." He didn't look away from me, his gaze holding me hostage.

Tears stained my cheeks again as I attempted another approach. "I need you to accept things and move on. I need you in my life, you're too important to me."

He shook his head. "You _need_ me? Why? I need you too, it seems to me though that we need each other a little differently than the other." He leaned back in his chair. "What do you need from me exactly?"

"To just be in my life!" I blurted. "There was a time when the only person I could turn and talk to was you. What happened to that?!" my voice was desperate.

"I fell in love with you, and I needed more. More than just the friendship you were offering me." he tapped his fingers lightly on the table.

The waitress came to drop off our drinks. "Thank you." We answered in unison, again our eyes not leaving each other's. I downed the entire glass as soon as she left. We sat staring at each other for what felt like hours, the waitress was attentive, bringing me another glass of wine. I took big sips before Kellan snatched the glass from me.

"Slow down, Lex, I don't want to have to carry you out of here. You haven't eaten anything yet." He said in his usual, protective tone.

"I miss that, you taking care of me. Why can't we go back to that?" I reached across the table taking his hand.

"What the fuck is this?" my eyes widened and I froze hearing his voice. Kellan didn't flinch. He never looked away from me.

I turned around. "Jackson." I whispered. "What are you doing here?" He stood there with Daniel, his hands balled into fists. He was shaking.

"Lunch with your father?" he looked to me accusingly. I could literally see the anger emanating from him.

"Jackson, this…This isn't…" I was trying to find the right thing to say but I couldn't put a fucking sentence together to save my life.

"Daniel, take Ms. Moore out to the car." He instructed.

"Jackson, I…"

"Not another fucking word, Lexi." He looked at me, the look of betrayal in his eyes. "Wait in the car." He said slowly. I nodded getting up from my seat.

"Wow, are you fucking kidding me, Lex? You can't have lunch with _friends_ anymore?" Jackson glared across the table at Kellan.

He slowly turned back to look at me again. "Go."

I let Daniel lead me away and looked at Kellan one more time before turning away.

* * *

_Jackson_

I unbuttoned my jacket taking a seat across from Kellan. "Mr. Cooper, I have put up with your shit one too many times. Lexi is with me, if you want to remain in her life, I suggest you get on board with it."

"You need to understand how impossible that is for me, Mr. Anderson. Because you see, whether you like it or not, I am in love with her. Could you be friends with her? If she left you tomorrow, could you remain friends with Lexi Moore?" he challenged.

"Irrelevant. She's with me, she's not going anywhere." I snapped. This fucker had some nerve.

"She and I share something deeper beyond your understanding. She needs me, _I'm _not going anywhere." He kept his eyes on me, never wavering.

"You have got some serious set of balls, Mr. Cooper, I'll give you that. Does it please you? Going after another man's woman?"

"Just yours." He answered his face unchanging.

I was violently shaking, and it took everything I had not to lunge across this table. "Watch yourself Mr. Cooper." I warned.

"She means everything to me. I'd rather die than watch you run her into the ground. She isn't safe with you." He spat out.

"We're done here." I stood up. "Don't let my calm demeanor fool you, Mr. Cooper. Don't mistake it for anything but a favor to Lexi. For some unknown reason she really cares for you, but she _loves_ me. You'll do well to come to realize that, stop torturing yourself." I dropped a bill on the table and walked away.

Daniel was waiting for me by the car and held the door open for me. Lexi was looking out the window when I got in, avoiding any eye contact. "Home, Daniel." I instructed.

"Yes, sir." He pulled away from the curb.

"Leah said you had meetings all day." It wasn't a question.

"Ask me if I give a fuck about that right now, Lexi." She didn't, she continued staring out the window. This was the furthest we ever sat from each other, her body leaning against her door, me on the opposite side by mine. I reached out to grab her hand but she pulled away. The car ride was painfully silent. She never looked at me once or uttered a single word. The silence was suffocating.

Daniel pulled into the driveway and I was prepared to get out of the car as soon as the car came to a stop, I knew she'd run in without wanting to speak with me and I wasn't letting her get away with this that easy. Sure enough once the car came to a rolling stop she jumped out, I followed close behind.

"Lexi!" I shouted following her into the house. She headed to our bedroom without a word. I followed her inside shutting the door behind me. I slid my jacket off and loosened my tie, pulling it off, unbuttoning the top buttons to my shirt. I felt like I was choking from the anger building inside of me. She stood against the wall with her arms crossed against her chest, her shoulder bared. I couldn't keep my breathing under control, it felt impossible. "What the fuck, Lexi? You're lying to me now? Since when?" I asked not really wanting to know.

She scoffed, pushing off the wall she headed to the bathroom.

"Lexi, get your ass back out here now!" I shouted.

"I'm not a fucking little girl, Jackson! Don't yell at me like I am one!"

"Talk to me. I'm having trouble understanding why you went out of your way to lie."

She shook her head. "That's it? You're going to assume I was lying without hearing my side of this?" she grabbed her keys.

"Put those down." I warned. She ignored my advice, walking toward the door. I snatched the keys from her hand backing away. "Do I have to throw these away? Do you want to be carless?"

"Give them to me." she held out her hand not looking at me.

"Look at me, Lexi."

"Give me my fucking keys, Jackson!" she screamed.

"No fucking way. You want them? Come and get them." I shoved them into my pocket.

She marched right up to me smacking me across the face. I expected that, it was no surprise. I deserved it. I'm sure there was an explanation to what happened today and I felt like a piece of shit for calling her a liar.

"I hate you!" she screamed through her tears, smacking me again. "Why is it you always assume the worst? You always think I'm lying to you!" she balled her hands into fists, beating against my chest.

I wrapped my arms tightly around her burying my face in her neck. "I'm sorry, baby, I'm sorry." She tried pulling away from me, but I held her tighter. "Don't." I whispered.

"Get off of me!" she pushed against me again.

"No."

"Get your hands off of me, I hate you!" she beat against me again.

"I know, baby, I'm sorry." I stood taking the hits she delivered. She tired eventually, bawling into my chest.

"I tried to call you. I knew you'd be upset with me."

"I know you did, baby." I rubbed her back, kissing her neck.

"Then why were you so angry with me?"

"Leah told me you called as soon as I got a minute. You never call the office so I got worried. I tried to call you but you weren't answering so I tracked your phone. I cancelled all of my meetings and saw you there with him. My temper got the better of me, I'm so sorry." I continued to rub her back until her breathing came to a calmer tempo.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I'm really sorry." She reached up touching my stinging cheek.

I shook my head. "It's my fault. I just lose all control when I see you with him. I should have known better." I brushed her hair from her eyes, planting a kiss on her forehead. "Come with me." I led her to the bathroom.

Reaching over I turned the nozzle for the hot water, filling the tub. I reached down gripping the hem of her shirt and pulled it up over her head letting it fall to the floor and started on her shorts. She reached up helping me out of my clothes, holding her hand I led her into the bath sitting her in front of me. She turned to face me.

"I love you." She stroked my cheek.

"I love you most, baby." I leaned my head back against the tub. She straddled my lap, kissing me softly. The kiss wasn't heated or urgent at all, but the exact opposite, soft and tender.

We didn't say anything else while we made love in the tub, we didn't have to. I already knew where her heart was.

_With me._


	7. Chapter 7 - Memories

**Chapter 7**

_Memories – September 2, 2013_

_Jackson_

The rest of our day was less intense. We had a friendly dinner together and didn't speak of the incident again. Neither of us brought it up, not really wanting to relive everything. But, in the back of my mind I needed to know what happened. I trusted the fact that she didn't pull anything behind my back, it was just pure curiosity. We snuggled up in bed, holding each other, and I gathered up the courage to finally ask.

"Are you ready to talk about it?" I felt her body tense up to the sound of my sudden question. I felt myself holding my breath until I heard her speak.

"I guess so." She replied, sighing, short and simple.

"Ok, so tell me, what happened?" I ran my hand along her back to assure some sort of comfort that I was no longer angry.

"I was in class, taking down notes, when I heard my phone vibrating a couple of times. I was concentrating on nothing else but getting my notes written down. I was too busy to consider looking at the phone to check and see who it was." She started off. "So, when class let out and I stepped outside of the building I pulled my phone out to see that I received two messages, both from my father."

I nodded. "Go on."

"He apologized, notifying me that he got held up at the office. He knew I was without a car today since the original plan was for us to go to lunch together and he was going to drop me off. So, that's when he sent Kellan in his place. He felt terrible, I guess he felt it was the least he could do. To send a replacement." Her voice was quiet. "I never intended to meet Kellan today, it happened so fast the first thing I thought to do was call to let you know. I called your cell phone right away but I got your voicemail, so I called the office. I know if I can't reach you on your cell it usually means you're busy, but I didn't want you to be upset so I did what I could to try and reach you. That's when Leah answered, and she told me you'd be in meetings all day." She sat up looking down at her hands. "I would _never_ lie to you. I would _never_ hurt you intentionally. You have to know that, Jax. It physically hurts me every time you think I would." A single teardrop slid down her cheek and she quickly reached up, wiping it away. "I don't know what else to do. I've given you all of me."

I sat up slowly, facing her, sitting close so our knees were touching. Reaching out I took her face in my hands, forcing her to look me in the eyes. "I _know_, baby. I know you belong to me, I know you love me. I know all of that, I do. _Believe me_. But, I just can't help myself when I see you with that asshole. I'm sorry." Another tear followed, splashing against my hand. "_I'm_ the asshole, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have assumed you were lying, I didn't mean any of it."

A steady stream of tears started to slide down her cheeks just then and before I knew it she was crying, her face still in my hands. I wiped them away with the pads of my thumbs and watched the person I love most hurting because of me. My heart felt it was shattering into a million pieces. _I'm such a fucking asshole_.

"You believe me don't you? I didn't mean any of it, baby, I promise. I'm just a fucking idiot, forgive me, _please_." I reached down taking her hands in mine, bringing them up to my lips, kissing them softly. "I love you, I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Everything is just so fucked up." She said through sobs. "I really need for the both of you to just get along!"

"Baby, that's impossible, I'm sorry." As much as I wanted to give her whatever she wanted at the current moment that was one wish I wouldn't be able to fulfill.

"Why?" she croaked.

"Could you be friends with someone who wanted to take me from you?" she blinked up at me.

"What?" she said breathily.

"He wants what's _mine_. If it were completely up to me I would forbid you to see him altogether. But, I don't see that happening. If you have such a strong need to have to see him, see him." _That was the most painful thing I have ever had to say_. "In exchange, I ask you not to try and force us to be friends. There's no way in hell. It makes no sense."

She sat soaking in what I just told her, looking down at her fingers. "I think I should give him some time before taking on another one on one meeting."

"Why?" _I knew damn well why_.

"I think it's hard for him to be around me."

"Is there something I should know, Lexi?" I wanted so badly for her to be honest with me I wanted to hear it from her. She sat twiddling her thumbs together quietly, contemplating what to say next. "Lexi."

"I told you already, he loves me in a way I can't reciprocate. Every time I see him it's the same conversation all over again. It's beginning to be too hard for me to see him, too." She said quietly.

"Now you know why I hate to see you with him." I said calmly.

She nodded. "I do, but I can't shut him out forever, Jax. I _do_ love him, just not the way I love you." She looked up at me. "Do you understand where I'm coming from?"

"No, not really, but I can try." I answered. I laid back down gently pulling her down with me. "As long as you don't go anywhere, I will try." I kissed the side of her head.

* * *

_Lexi_

I woke up with the sudden urge to pee. I hurriedly got up, careful not to wake Jax and ran to the bathroom. _That was weird_. I could normally hold it until the morning, but I felt like I was going to burst. I looked at the clock, it was only 3am but I felt wide awake now. I walked over to the door and headed to the kitchen for a glass of water. After gently setting the glass into the sink I started wandering around the big house, exploring it all over again. My curiosity led me back to _that _room, I opened the door to see what had happened to the room since I saw it last. I was shocked to find nothing, everything was gone.

"What are you doing in here, Lexi?" I almost jumped right out of my skin he scared the shit out of me.

"Jesus!" my hand shot up over my heart and the other one clutched my stomach. "What are you doing up?" I was still trying to steady my crazy beating heart.

He walked up wrapping his arms around me from behind. "You were gone, I can't sleep without you. What are you doing in here, baby?" he kissed my shoulder.

"Everything is gone. Where did everything go?" I asked curiously.

"Lexi, do we really have to revisit that day?"

"I'm just curious, Jax." I answered.

"After you left that day, I destroyed everything." He said sadly.

"You what?" I whispered, shocked.

* * *

_Jackson_

"When you walked out of this room, I screamed for you to come back, _begged_ you. I thought I was losing you forever." I leaned my forehead down onto her shoulder. It was beyond painful revisiting this memory. "I ran after you, I tried begging you to stay. You promised me you would never leave, no matter how bad things got, you promised we would work it out. I couldn't believe what was happening. Whatever I didn't kick to pieces, I punched, I threw, or I smashed." I whispered thinking back to that day.

_"Please, I can't live without you. I can't live without your smile, your laugh, your touch, your love… I just can't, baby, please don't go. Don't do this to me. I love you, baby. Lexi, look at me, baby… Look at me!" I was beyond desperate. My tears didn't feel like a part of me anymore, they were falling so freely with a mind of their own. _

_ She ripped my hands from her waist. "I didn't do this to you. Remember that, Jackson." She backed away from me, walking away, out the door. NO! _

"_LEXI!...BABY, PLEASE!...LEXI!...LEXI, COME BACK!" I shouted and shouted at the top of my lungs. I swiped the frames off the shelves, punching my fist through the wall. When I realized she wasn't going to turn back, I ran after her. She can't leave me, she can't!_

_My feet finally carried me toward the front door and I rushed out after her, she was getting into her car when I got outside. "No, baby, please!" I ran up to her window, banging desperately. "Baby? Baby, please, open the door. You promised me, you promised me you wouldn't do this. Remember? Unlock the door so we could talk, please, I can explain!" She finally looked up at me her beautiful ocean blue eyes were red, bloodshot. Her beautiful face stained with tears, tears I caused. She looked betrayed as she looked at me through the window tears streaming down her face with no end. _

_Please open the door, please, please. I silently begged. Seeing her like this was slowly killing me. I couldn't take it. She took one last look at me, slowly shaking her head she pulled out of my driveway._

"_NO! Lexi! Come back!" I shouted after her, sobbing. I watched as her car grew smaller until it was completely out of view. _

_I don't know how long I stood in that driveway, but when I finally snapped out of it I strode back into the house and straight back to the room. My chest was heaving up and down as I took deep breaths in and out, taking a look around the room. The shrine I kept to my past life that no longer existed, the room that took away what was most important to me now. The person I loved, who was still here, alive and breathing, now left me. And not even for the right reasons, she had it all wrong she had to know the truth._

_Looking at the room now left me with nothing but anger. I didn't stop until everything in the room was in pieces; the crib, the bookshelf, the rocking chair, everything broken. I sank to my knees and wailed. My knuckles were bloody, dripping into the carpet. I couldn't feel anything, I felt numb. I had one thing, and only one thing, on my mind. Lexi. I need her to come back. I need to hold her, to feel her. I feel so empty and alone._

_I got up and headed to the bathroom. I turned the nozzle on the sink and ran my hand under the streaming water. I grabbed the nearest hand towel and wrapped it around my hand. Grabbing my cell phone I dialed Daniel._

"_Pull up." _

_I ran outside and found him already there. I jumped into the backseat instructing him to head to Lexi's condo. "Hurry, Daniel."_

_I didn't even wait until the car came to a complete stop to jump out. I ran through the lobby toward the elevators, pushing the button continuously until the doors swung open. Pushing the button for her floor, I impatiently waited. Once the doors swung open again to her floor, I ran out stopping in front of her door. _

_ "LEXI!" I shouted, banging on her door. I'm sure I will disturb a few of her neighbors, but I didn't care. "LEXI, PLEASE! BABY, OPEN THE DOOR!" I banged again, ringing her doorbell, banging again and again. I wish she would have given me a fucking key! I leaned my back against the door, sinking down to the floor. Please…_

"I tried for two hours to get you to open the door before I realized you were probably with Harper." I swallowed past the lump in my throat. She turned in my arms to face me, wrapping her arms around my neck. "I couldn't keep this room the way it was anymore, I don't know what happened to everything. I had Leah take care of it."

She rubbed my back, soothingly. "With the way the room was set up, and how clean it was, I was sure you were married with a child on the way. I'm sorry." She whispered into my neck.

"I have Amanda clean that room whenever she cleans the rest of the house. But, I always have her lock it afterwards." I explained.

"My curiosity got the better of me when I found the keys on the hallway table. I hope you didn't give Amanda too much trouble for my being nosy." She looked up at me.

I shook my head. "It wasn't her fault, it was my own. Memories of Ellie and our baby will always stay with me, with or without this room. I shouldn't have kept it. I don't know why I did, maybe I felt some sort of comfort leaving everything the way it was? I'm not sure. I should have explained it to you at the very least. I was just so focused on getting you to calm down before I did anything else, so I could _explain_. I literally saw your mind working you into that dark corner in your imagination, leading you to imagine the worst, all I could think was to pull you out of it. But, it didn't work." I wrapped my arms around her, shuddering.

"I'm so sorry." She continued to rub my back.

"It doesn't matter now. All that matters is that you're here."

"Will we ever move past all of this? This is what I was afraid of. Our relationship revolving around our past, it was why I left, Jax." I pulled away from her eyes wide.

"The people we have lost will always remain with us, whether we are together or not. Memories of them will forever haunt us. What happened to them is not our fault, it was beyond our control. But, that's all that they will be, _memories_." I placed my hands on each of her arms. "We need each other. _I_ may not deserve you, but _we_ deserve _each other_, Lexi." My hands gripped down on her arms. "Do you understand?"

"Why do you keep saying things like that?" my brows creased together at her question. "Why do you keep saying that you don't deserve me? Who am I to be put on a pedestal I don't deserve to be on? Stop it, Jax. You deserve me plenty. Your soul is pure, and I love you with everything I have. You are a good man." Her eyes misted over and she reached up, cupping my cheek. She stood on the tips of her toes to kiss me, "Take me to bed, babe." She ran her hands through my hair and wrapped a leg around my waist.

I bent down gripping the backs of her thighs, picking her up. "I love you, baby." I whispered against her soft lips.

"Oh, Jax, I will always love you."


	8. Chapter 8 - Fever

**Chapter 8**

_Fever – September 6, 2013_

_Lexi_

I woke up not feeling too good this morning, I looked over at the clock and saw it was now 7am. I was sick of feeling like this every day I got up and threw on my sports bra, running shorts and shoes. Writing a little sticky note to stick to the headboard for Jackson, I quietly snuck out of the room. Once I got outside of the house I plugged my headphones into my ears and started to stretch. My music preference for when I run is normally something upbeat; house mixes, DJ remixes, and such. It helps me get pumped for the run ahead of me. Once I was done stretching, I started my _Track my Run_ app to keep track of my progress, and then I broke out into a light jog.

During my run I started to think of everything going on in my life, when I say everything, I mean _everything_. Jackson, Harper, Nick, Kellan, my parents, even Bree, Kali and Jackson's parents, school, etc. My life has gotten so busy in the past couple months compared to the last four years, I can't complain, I kind of love it. I love everyone in my life, and I can't imagine a life without any of them in it.

Jackson, my love, my partner, my soul, and my main support; just a couple weeks ago I was so reluctant to move in, but now I can't imagine living alone anymore. It feels so normal seeing him every day and every night. I never thought of myself as the domestic type, it was a pleasant surprise. He brought out a whole new side to me, a more affectionate side of me. I wasn't too big on romance and PDA before, even with Eli, it felt awkward and unnecessary. But, it came so naturally with him. Around him, my body was not my own, all things function according to him and his presence. Without him around, I felt lost.

Harper and Nick, two of my three best friends…They got me through my Eli storm, I wouldn't have survived it if they weren't there to pull me in every time I went off into the deep end. I remember what life was like when my wounds were still fresh. I felt like a wife in mourning, grieving her husband's death. Eli was such a big part of my life we were friends before lovers, so in a way I felt like I lost a big chunk of _myself_. But, they were there, every step of the way. I could always count on Harper, this I knew for certain. She was always on my side, even if I were in the wrong. Whenever I thought of her I would get too emotional, she was the sister I never had.

Kellan, my dearest Kellan. Now, with him, I could never hold back tears. A new emotion brought up as of late. Whenever I used to think about him I used to get flooded with warm emotions, friendly emotions. But now, the thought of him made me so sad. I found myself tearing up again at the thought of him. I love him so much, as a friend and as a brother. I wished he would find someone good for him. God knows he deserves it more than anyone. He has been a huge influence in my life the past four years, a good influence. He was always so positive and confident about everything. His presence was intoxicating and addicting, he was always a joy to have around. I know he needs time, so all I can do now is hold him close to my heart.

My parents, my crazy, crazy parents, what would I do without them? Their unconditional and undying love for me is overwhelming. My loving, caring father, who would go to the moon and back to see his little girl happy, what would I do without him? My whacky ass mother, whose intentions are always good, but had her own way of showing it. What would I do without her? Better yet, what would she do without me? No one would be able to understand her and accept her the way I have. I laughed quietly to myself at the thought of her.

Bree, a sister gained through the connection to the love of my life. I knew he held her dear to his heart, so naturally I did too. But, that's not fair. That's not why I held her so close to my heart, she and I had an instant connection, a bond. I felt closer to her than I have with my other friends in the past, other friends that I have known _longer_ than her. She was beginning to feel like a sister to me as well, and I felt so lucky to have had the chance to meet someone like her in my life. The kind of person she is, the kindest of all, a selfless person with an enormous heart. A Peds surgeon who saves children every God given day, the kind of someone who saved an innocent child from her monstrous parents. She's a hero in my book.

Kali, my baby girl, we are not related by blood, but we might as well be. I felt a motherly love for that little girl. I would go to the moon and back to see her smile, I would hurt anyone who dared hurt her. I loved her more than anything, just as if she were my own. She deserves big things in her life, and I know for certain she will get them. Her future holds good things for her from here on out. As long as she sticks with this family now, there was no way her life would be short of perfect. She has too many people who love her around. We would never sit back and watch her fail. We would support her to the very end.

Lynn and Alan, Jackson's parents…Whether they birthed him or not, makes no difference to me. They raised him in a privileged home, and made sure he had everything he needed to grow up to the man he is today. They raised such a good man, I was more than lucky to have him in my life. Such humbled people, I've never met people like them in my life, aside from my parents. They were so kind, so gentle, so _loving_. When I think of parents' love, I think of them, two great people with such big hearts, two wonderful children, and one beautiful grandchild. I think it's safe to say, they did pretty great. They _are_ pretty great.

I looked down at the app as I started approaching the house, I ran roughly a mile. _Good enough for me_. I reached the driveway when I saw Jackson walking out of the house in his basketball shorts. I smiled and sighed at the sight of my man. So unbelievably sexy, I would never grow tired of his perfection. Will I ever get used to it? Or will my heart always beat twice as fast whenever we were in the same room? Either way was fine with me, as long as I had forever with this man. I ran faster, giggling. He smiled when he saw me running up and held his arms out to me. I leaped up and wrapped my legs around him.

"Morning, baby."

"Good morning to you, Mr. Anderson. I'm all gross, I'm sorry." I frowned when I felt my sweaty body make contact with his warm skin.

"Are you kidding me? You look sexy, I'm not sure I approve of your running attire." He glanced down at my sports bra. "Anyone could be looking at you, the thought is unsettling." He frowned. "How'd you enjoy your run?"

"Oh my God, I _loved_ it! It has been a while!" I laughed wrapping my arms around him. "I missed you though." I pouted.

"I missed you most. You need to stop leaving me in bed, my body is always aware of your absence. But, I'm glad you enjoyed your workout."

I nodded. "I did." I smiled. "Put me down, babe. I need to get some water." He didn't put me down but he did carry me to the kitchen. "Jackson, I'm not a baby!" I giggled.

"You are. _My_ baby." He said with a wink. He set me down on the counter and walked over to the fridge. I sighed leaning my head back against the cupboard, I watched him move around in the kitchen, his back muscles perfectly contracting when he reached up for the bottle. _Perfect_. I bit my lower lip, my eyes travelled down to his ass and I found myself smiling like an idiot. He turned around and handed me the bottle with a smile. "Excuse me, what was that?" he asked amused.

"Nothing." I opened the bottle and took in gulps at a time.

Amanda walked into the kitchen smiling widely at me. "Lexi, you are _glowing_!"

I laughed. "Thank you, Amanda. It's the sweaty stink from my run that's doing all the glowing."

"Running?" her brows raised.

I nodded with a smile. "Running!" I jumped down from the counter.

She chuckled softly. "I see, are you hungry at all?"

"No, not really, I'm just going to go get ready. Thank you, Amanda." I started to walk out of the kitchen when I felt Jackson's arm snake around my stomach.

"No. She'll eat. Thank you, Amanda." He said leading me to the bar chairs.

"Jackson!" I started to protest.

"Do you want to pass out?" he retorted. "Don't worry me. Sit, please eat." He pleaded.

"Fine." I sat down. "Just some fruit then, I'm really not hungry."

Amanda went shuffling through the kitchen and pulled out an assortment of fresh fruits, setting them down in front of me. Jackson gave her a look only she could understand and she smiled in return. She turned back around and came back with croissants and bagels. I glared up at him and he stared back at me. I grabbed a croissant and waved it in front of his face before popping a piece of it into my mouth.

"_You_ are a bully!" I said with my mouth full. He chuckled softly, kissing the side of my head. He got up and walked around the counter to the coffee pot and poured two mugs, setting one in front of me. "Jax, I'm sorry, can I actually get a juice? I'm all hot and sweaty I don't want anything hot right now."

"Of course." He turned around heading to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of orange juice and poured it into the glass in front of me.

"Thank you." I smiled.

After breakfast I ran to the bathroom and took a quick shower, I was running later than I wanted and I had no time to waste. I hurried over to the closet and shuffled through my clothes. _What to wear, what to wear?!_ I pulled out my yellow, silk tank top and white cotton shorts, and decided to pair it with a black blazer and white pumps. After getting dressed, I walked over to the vanity to apply my makeup and saw Jackson lounging on the bed, just watching me.

"Jesus Christ, Jax, I'm going to be late!" I exclaimed. "Why do you always sit there watching me?"

"Because you're beautiful." He leaned back on his elbows. "And because I can." He shrugged with a smile.

"If I'm late, I'm going to give you a good kick in the ass, Jackson Anderson!" I scolded.

"I'm not going to work today, I'm going to drop you off at school, I don't need to get ready." He said laughing.

I whipped my head around to look at him. "What? Really?" I smiled.

He nodded with a smile. "Really."

"What a nice surprise! You haven't had any time to spare in a while!" I turned back around to finish applying my mascara and walked over to my accessories. I put in some hoop earrings and pulled out a long charm necklace.

"Stop." His voice startled me.

"What? What is it, what's wrong?" I asked looking at him.

He got up and opened the drawer to his bedside table pulling out a familiar box. He pulled out my Cartier necklace and walked over to me. My eyes instantly stung with tears, I was wondering what had happened to the necklace. The last thing I remember, I threw it at him while we were in that room. I didn't know he kept it.

He slipped it around my neck, and locked the clasp. "Don't ever take this off again." He whispered, kissing the spot between my neck and shoulder.

I nodded, a tear falling. "I won't." I promised.

He reached up wiping away the stray tear. "Come on, let's get you to school, baby."

"Ok." I breathed. I grabbed my purse and let him lead me out to the car. He held the door open for me and helped me get into the car before closing the door behind me.

I sat fingering the diamond around my neck. He got in beside me, in the driver's seat, taking my other hand and pulled out of the driveway. We pulled up to a red light and he kissed the back of my hand running his thumb across my knuckles.

"I wasn't sure what happened to this necklace. I'm so glad you still have it." I whispered.

"Of course, I still have it. It's yours. I could never get rid of it. It was my first gift to you." He said softly. "It hurt me when you took it off. Mainly because I've _never_ seen you take it off before." He pointed out.

"I love you, Jax." I kissed the center of his palm.

"I love you most, baby." He leaned in softly kissing me on the lips. "I love you _always_."

He pulled up to my building and I really didn't want to get out of the car. "I don't want to go." I pouted.

He chuckled. "Just say the word, baby, and I'll turn this car around." He smirked.

I laughed. "No way, I need to get to class!" I leaned in for a kiss before getting out of the car. "I'll miss you!"

"I'll miss you most." He kissed me again. "What time should I be here to pick you up?"

"Four-Thirty." I frowned. It was only 10 o'clock.

"I will be counting down the hours, Ms. Moore. Get out of here before I change my mind and take you home." He smacked my ass as I got out causing me to yelp. People walking by started to giggle when they caught what he did. Everyone on campus knew who we were, mainly because the paparazzi took it upon themselves to harass me here on my first day. I reported it to the campus and they had them escorted off. They weren't much of a problem after that. Jackson took care of it, of course.

"Behave yourself." I pointed at him.

"With you? Never." He grinned.

I laughed and blew him a kiss over my shoulder as I made my way toward the building.

"I LOVE YOU, LEXI MOORE!" he shouted embarrassingly loud.

"Jackson!" I hissed.

He laughed pulling away from the curb. I heard girls laughing and whispering about how hot he is, how lucky I am, blah blah blah. UGH! I will get him for that later. I walked up the steps to the door and headed into my first class of the day.

Halfway through my first class I started to feel like shit again. I started feeling a little warm, and my vision of the board started to blur. I shook my head and tried to focus. It didn't work, my head started pounding. I reached up, holding a hand to my forehead and felt that I was now burning up. I got up and gathered my stuff and walked out of the classroom. I stumbled a little while I made my way to the nearby bench, I felt dizzy and my head was burning up so bad it felt like I had a pulse. I reached into my purse grabbing my cell phone and dialed Harper.

"Hey bitch, how's it hangin?" she greeted.

"Harper…" I whispered, my voice cracking.

"Lexi? What's wrong, babe?! Where are you?"

"School." I managed to whisper. "Can…Can you come get…" everything went black.

I don't know how long I was passed out on the bench before I felt Harper's arms around me. "LEXI? LEXI WHAT'S WRONG?!" she shook me awake. She brought her hand up to my forehead and gasped. "Lexi, you're burning up! I need you to cooperate with me while I try to get you out to the car. I'm taking you to the hospital. Can you help me, babe? Do you think you can make it out to the car?" I barely nodded and my head felt like it was throbbing. She swung my arm over her shoulder and she helped me up. I helped as much as my weak body would allow and somehow together we managed to get to the car. She sat me in the front seat and buckled me in."

A nurse came with a wheelchair, she and Harper worked together to get me into it and she wheeled me to a nearby waiting room and informed us a doctor would be in as soon as he could. Harper worked on paperwork and tried to keep me awake, it was so hard I just wanted to sleep. The doctor came in a little while later with a nurse who took my temperature, a blood sample and asked Harper a few questions she had no answers to. Harper tried getting me to drink some water, I cooperated taking small sips and the doctor returned to the room.

"Ms. Moore, do you think you're up for a few questions?" he asked gently. I nodded. "Great. Can you start by telling me what you had to eat this morning?" he asked with a pen in hand.

"Fruit…Croissant and juice." I replied weakly.

"Sounds about normal." He started scribbling a few things down. "What did your morning consist of?"

"Well, I went out for a morning run. But, it has been a while." I answered.

"How far and how long?" he asked scribbling again.

"About a mile, it has been a couple months since my last run." I answered.

"Ok. Ms. Moore, while a jog doesn't necessarily _harm_ the baby, I suggest you take it easy during the first trimester. It could have shocked your system, trying to take on running again so suddenly. Try yoga or something, and then slowly ease yourself back into jogging during the second trimester." He advised.

"WHAT?" Harper and I asked in unison.

"What baby?" I asked shaking my head.

"Ms. Moore, my apologies, I thought you knew. You're pregnant." He said looking slightly uncomfortable.

_WHAT?!_


	9. Chapter 9 - Unexpected

**Chapter 9**

_Unexpected – September 6, 2013_

_Lexi_

"I'm sorry, doctor. I think I misheard you. Can you repeat that, please?" There was no way I was pregnant, that can't be right.

"Ms. Moore, we ran your blood through some tests. You are definitely pregnant. There is no mistake." He clarified.

"What…How?" I couldn't form words, let alone a complete sentence.

He frowned. "Are you using contraceptives?" he asked.

"Um, yes?" I raised my eyebrows. "Kind of the reason why I'm having a hard time believing I am pregnant. I am on the pill, I never miss one. I am really good about taking it."

"Well, let's walk through this. Normally a number of things could have led to your pregnancy. Either you skipped one, or it could be a problem from the brand of your pills, sometimes they issue a recall because of some sort of mistake in the factory. Or it could also be other medication you mixed with your pill, antibiotics perhaps."

I looked up at him right then. "Antibiotics?!"

He nodded. "Yes, it sort of cancels out your birth control if you were taking them for whatever reason."

"I had my wisdom tooth pulled a month back, I was prescribed antibiotics during recovery." I whispered.

"Well, there you have it."

I felt Harper clutching my hand. I totally forgot she was here. She had been so quiet this whole time. "Oh my God," I sucked in a breath of air, a tear slid down my cheek as I laid a protective hand over my stomach. "I'm pregnant…" Harper gave my hand a firm squeeze.

"I'm going to schedule you to come back for an eighth week check-up so we can take a look at that baby of yours." He smiled walking out of the room to give Harper and me some privacy.

"Holy shit, sweets. I can't believe I'm going to be an aunt!" she wiped away her tears and reached over wrapping me in a bear hug.

I couldn't wrap my mind around what just happened. _I'm pregnant_. What will Jackson think? Will he like the idea? He has been so busy lately, I feel like the timing is so off. I know he loves me, but throwing a baby in the mix is a whole other thing. Do I tell him? Oh God, what do I do?

I clutched my stomach again, there's a baby growing inside of me. I just couldn't believe it. I was carrying Jackson's child, I felt a smile play across my lips and felt so overwhelmingly happy. Whether Jackson liked the idea or not, you are mine, all mine. I love you so much already. Another tear slid down my cheek and Harper gave my hand a squeeze.

"Are you ok, Lex? Do you need anything?" she asked concerned.

"I feel much better, what'd they give me?" I realized what I just asked and my eyes widened in shock. "Did they give me something that could harm the baby?!" I freaked.

"Let me go ask, stay here." She walked out of the room.

My mind started wandering and overworking like it always did. What happens now? What will life be like now? Will Jackson take me to checkups? Will he be here for this baby? I understand he is a busy man, but it's not fair to the baby. He should be a part of its life. What do I do about school? I realized all that didn't matter right now. The only thing that mattered was that I put my baby first, make sure that I keep healthy for it. 'It'. I didn't like that word when referring to my baby. I needed to come up with another word for it and fast.

Harper walked back into the room with the doctor and I straightened up. "You had a few questions, Ms. Moore?" he smiled warmly.

"I was feeling a little bit better and I was wondering how that was?"

He nodded. "I'm glad you asked, it's good to ask questions if it's your first pregnancy." He said. "You said you had no idea you were pregnant, so I'm guessing you don't have any signs of morning sickness, correct?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yes, that's right."

"So, normally in these cases, your appetite isn't what it used to be. But, you shouldn't reject eating all together. Your body isn't getting the necessary nutrients it needs, and you need to make sure to keep yourself hydrated at all times, Ms. Moore. We hooked you up to an IV drip while you were out, that's why you're feeling better. Even if you're not hungry, you need to eat something, try and find something your body will accept. I have prescribed prenatal vitamins that you can pick up, that should also help balance your system out. Remember, Ms. Moore, you're now eating for two. That also means that your little one is taking half of everything, you need to give your body what it needs to keep up. Take extra good care of yourself, we don't want to see you back in here unless it's for a healthy check up on the baby!" he smiled.

I nodded in understanding. "Thank you so much." I breathed out taking in all the information I was fed. "And for my fever, what could I take for that? I don't want to harm the baby." I clutched my stomach.

"Your temperature is showing some improvement, so it's nothing to worry yourself about. You're just going to need someone at home to take care of you while you fully recover." _Jackson's expertise, he always took great care of me in my time of need_. I nodded. "Tylenol should do the trick. It is pregnancy safe." He smiled patting me on the back. "No need to worry, but if you ever have any questions, you call me." He handed me his card. _Dr. Phillip Reynolds_.

"Thank you again, Dr. Reynolds." I smiled weakly.

"Not a problem at all, Ms. Moore. You ladies are good to go. Remember, if _anything_, just call." He opened the door walking out of the room.

"He's nice, I like him!" Harper beamed. "How are you feeling sweets?" she asked helping me up.

"Better." I replied softly. "Can you help me dress?"

"Of course!" she answered.

Once I got dressed we stopped by the pharmacy to pick up my vitamins. I waited in the car while Harper ran in to pick them up and my mind started wandering off again. I was still trying to get used to the fact that I was pregnant, but I kept thinking of what Jackson will make of everything. I pulled out my phone, looking at our picture on the home screen. Running my thumb over Jackson's face, I smiled. He would make a great father, especially after what happened with his first child. I think he'd cherish this baby that much more.

Harper got back into the car, catching me looking at Jackson's picture. "He'll love this baby, you know." She read my mind, she always did.

I sighed. "I know."

"What's wrong, sweets?" she asked worriedly.

"I just feel like it isn't the right time to tell him. He and Nick are working this huge Henderson deal…"

"Yea, I've heard a lot about it." she said dryly.

"I think I might wait to tell him. Just until the project is over, or until I start showing. Whichever comes first." I touched my stomach again letting out a small laugh.

"Are you sure that's a good idea, Lex?" her shoulders sagged.

"Yes, I don't want any distractions for him. He was already so stressed taking this deal, it brought up a lot of bad memories for him, Harp."

She nodded. "If you say so, babe." She sighed. "You should tell him soon though." She advised. "He would be thrilled." She smiled.

"The project shouldn't go on for too much longer. They've been working on it for the past few weeks already. It shouldn't be more than a month now. I will tell him the minute he's done." I smiled biting my lower lip. _I can't wait to tell him_.

* * *

_Jackson_

I was in the study, on the computer, going through work emails when I heard the doorbell. That's strange. I looked down at my watch, 1:30 pm. I wasn't expecting anyone. Amanda was making her way to the door just as I was.

"It's ok, Amanda. I got it, thank you." I opened the door to find Harper standing there.

"Harper, what a pleasant surprise." I smiled. "What can I do for you? Lexi's at school, if you were looking for her?"

"Please don't freak out." she said scrunching her face.

My smile fell and I felt my heart drop to my stomach. "What is it? Is it Lexi?"

"I said _not_ to freak out!"

"Harper, god damn it, what is it?!"

"Lexi is in the car. She called me from class, she passed out—"

I broke out into a run toward Harper's car before she could finish.

"Jackson wait!" she ran after me, grabbing my elbow. "Let me explain everything before you wake her!" she hissed.

"Why didn't she call me, Harper? She knew I was home all day today." My chest rose and fell with every breath I took.

"She knew you'd react this way, she hates worrying you, you know that." She said. "Listen to me. She was running a pretty high fever, I took her to the hospital, and they got her temperature to drop a little. She's _fine_ now." She reassured me. She handed me a bottle of Tylenol. "Give her this, with food, as instructed. Keep her temperature down, don't bundle her up in anything no matter how much she complains, she can't get too hot." I could barely keep up with what she was telling me, my mind was on Lexi, I kept looking back to the car. "Jackson, do you need me to stay?"

"No, I got it. What else?"

"Keep washing her with a cool cloth, it will help keep the temperature down. Make sure you feed her you _need_ to get her to eat, keep her hydrated! Her body's too low on necessary nutrients right now."

She hasn't been eating normally lately, I remember. I should have pushed her more, my jaw clenched tightly together.

"Don't do that." She snapped.

I raised my eyebrows. "Do what?" I asked.

"This isn't your fault, don't do that. She's stubborn as hell, I know that better than anyone." She rolled her eyes. "You have to put your foot down this time, Jackson. Don't let her one up you, she needs to eat." She instructed.

I nodded. "Ok, is there anything else?"

"Yes, call me if _anything_! I don't care what it is you need to ask, no question is a stupid question. Keep me informed. I worry about her a lot, Jackson. I will call you every five minutes if you don't call me voluntarily." She warned.

I smiled and nodded. "Got it, Harper. Thank you." I raised the bottle of Tylenol. "Are you sure this is strong enough? Maybe I should get her something else—"

"JACKSON ANDERSON, YOU DO EVERYTHING THE WAY I HAVE INSTRUCTED! IF I FIND OUT YOU HAVE STRAYED FROM THE PLAN I WILL GIVE YOU A GOOD KICK IN THE ASS!" she planted her hands on her hips.

"Ok, ok, I got it!" I held up my hands.

She nodded. "Help me get our girl out of the car." she turned around heading for the car.

She opened the door, finally giving me a look at my girl. Her cheeks were rosy from her fever and her forehead was lightly beaded with sweat. It broke my heart to see her so sick. I sighed leaning in to pick her up, her eyes fluttered open slowly and she looked up to me with a smile.

"Hey babe." She sounded so weak.

"Hey, baby, go back to sleep, I got you." I kissed her forehead, picking her up I nodded at Harper. "Thank you, again."

"Anytime." She smiled shutting the car door.

"Are you mad?" Lexi's voice was so weak it cracked under the strain.

"Shhh, no baby, of course I'm not mad."

I walked into our bedroom and set her down on the bed, walking over to the dresser I pulled out one of my shirts. She could barely keep her eyes open. I hurriedly made my way back over to the bed and helped her out of her clothes. She wrapped her arms around herself, shivering.

"I'm cold."

"Here baby, lift your arms up for me."

I slid my shirt on over her head and laid her down gently and lifted the thin sheet over her. I grabbed the comforter and tossed it to the side before she got her hands on it.

"Babe, I'm cold!"

"I know, baby, I'm so sorry. You can't layer yourself too much, you'll burn up."

"Can you at least come lay with me then? I'm too cold."

"Of course I can." I climbed in next to her and held her until she fell asleep.

I quietly climbed out of bed, careful not to wake her, and shut the door behind me. I didn't have to go looking for Amanda since she was already in the kitchen.

"Amanda, can you prepare some soups for Lexi? Anything that will help her fever." I instructed.

"Yes, of course, is she ok? Poor thing!" she asked looking sympathetic.

"She'll be okay she just needs to eat something. She hasn't been eating normally. I need you to make sure she eats if and when I'm not around to force her myself, Amanda. Can you do that?" my voice was stern.

"Yes, I can do that." She nodded. "Should I make her favorite? Chicken noodle?" she asked.

"Yes, I think she'll like that. Thank you, Amanda."

I walked around the counter pulling out a big bowl and took it back to the bathroom in our room. I filled it with cold water and grabbed a fresh hand towel, dropping it in the bowl of water. Walking back over to the bed, I set the bowl down on the bedside table and sat at her side. Even in sleep she looked like she was in pain, her forehead was lined with beads of sweat again. Wringing out the towel I brought it up to her face, gently washing it away, she stirred a little but never woke. I dipped and wrung out the towel again wiping down her neck and arms. I repeated these steps a couple of times before dipping and wringing out the towel again, folding it and setting it on her forehead.

I got up to dump out the water and climbed back in next to her, adjusting the sheet so it was covering her body again. _Please get better soon, Lexi_, I silently prayed. I wrapped my arm protectively over her and leaned in resting my forehead against her shoulder.

* * *

_Lexi_

I woke up to the feeling of something pressing down on my bladder. Looking over to my right I saw Jackson peacefully sleeping next to me with his arm draped over my stomach. What was that on my head? I reached up and pulled off the hand towel that was resting on my forehead. Where'd he learn to do that? I looked down again at his arm protectively wrapped over my stomach. _It's almost like he already knew_. I smiled at the thought and ran my hand along his forearm. He stirred awake and shot up when he realized I was up.

"Are you ok? What do you need?" he sat up on his knees.

"Water." My voice was hoarse, I was parched.

"Wait here." He got up running out to the kitchen. _I have to pee_! I got up slowly and headed to the bathroom. "Lexi?!" he called out from the other side of the door. I rolled my eyes.

"Jackson, I'm peeing, I'll be right out!" I called out. I finished up and opened the door to find him standing right in front of it. "Jesus, you startled me!"

"You should have told me, I would have helped you." He looked so worried.

"Jax, I had to pee." I let out a small laugh. "I have a fever, I'm not _dying_." I cupped his cheek.

"_Don't say stuff like that_!" he scolded.

"I'm sorry, but I really had to pee." I looked around. "Where's my water?"

"On the nightstand." I looked over and saw a tray with water and a bowl of something.

"What'd you bring me?" I smiled up at him.

"Chicken noodle soup." He kissed my forehead. "And you _will_ eat it."

I smiled walking toward the bed. "Of course I will." I sat on the bed and he set the bed tray down over my lap. "Thank you."

"Of course." He leaned down kissing the top of my head. "Eat up, you need to take some medicine, baby." He sat down in front of me, watching me eat. "Do you want me to pop in a movie?" he asked softly.

I shook my head. "No, I'd rather talk to you." I smiled. "How'd you manage to stay home today?" I asked curiously.

"I don't want to talk about that right now, baby. How's the soup?" I stopped what I was doing and set the spoon down.

"What do you mean?" I asked looking up.

"Lexi…"

"Tell me, Jax. Talk to me."

He sighed closing his eyes. "I took the day off so I could tell you about the trip I have to take out to Vegas for this hospital project." He answered quietly. "Lexi, I really don't want to discuss this with you right now. You're not feeling well, and I'd rather talk about it when you feel better. _Please_."

So, he's leaving. That's ok, it's for business. I'll be fine, he's being silly. "What for, Jax? It's fine. _I'm_ fine." I gave him a small smile.

His eyes widened, I guess he didn't expect me to be so calm. But, I think the distance will help me distract him. It would be harder to hide this pregnancy if he were here to monitor my every move.

"You're not upset?" he asked disbelieving.

I scooped a spoonful of the soup into my mouth. "Should I be?" I raised my eyebrows.

He shook his head. "No! It's just…" his mind is wandering off to Ellie again, I can tell.

"Jax, I'm fine. I promise, I'm fine, don't let your mind wander there." I reached out touching his hand. "I have Amanda, Harper, Nick, school…I barely have time for you when you _are_ here." I winked.

He sighed a breath of relief and took my face in his hands, kissing me.

"Jax, I'm sick!" I tried pulling away but he held me in place.

"You're amazing, I love you so much, Lexi." He kissed my forehead.

"I love you, too, Jax." I smiled. "When do you leave?"

"The fifteenth." He answered.

"When do you get back?"

"I'm only leaving for a week, that's all I agreed to. That's as long as I can take being away from you. So, I'll be back on the 22nd." He reached out stroking his thumb along my jawline.

"I'll miss you." I smiled taking another spoonful of soup into my mouth.

He groaned falling back onto the bed. "I fucking hate leaving you here. Are you sure you're ok with this? Are you sure you can't come?"

"Yes, of course I'm ok with this. It's your job, Jax. And no, you know I can't come with you." I lightly nudged him with my feet.

"I didn't expect you to take this so well. It's making it worse, if that makes any sense."

"Well, there's no pleasing you, is there?" I laughed.

He sat up running his hands through his hair. "I love you, princess."

"I love you most, Jax. Don't worry about me, I'll be waiting here for you when you get back." I said taking another spoonful.

* * *

**_September 6, 2013 - Letter #1_**

_My dearest Angel,_

_ This is my first letter to you, I've decided to write you a letter every day until you are born and one day I will gift them to you when you are old enough. I just found out today that I was pregnant with you. So unexpected but it doesn't make your existence any less special, nobody ever plans to have children, that's why they're considered miracles. I never knew I could love someone I haven't met yet, someone I know nothing about, to this extent. I love you so much, and I can't wait to meet you, little one. I have nicknamed you 'Angel' because it seemed fitting. You're a blessing to both your father and myself, we have endured a lot in our lives and I have a feeling you're about to make it all worth it. I haven't told him yet because I'm waiting for the perfect time to surprise him. But, promise me you'll grow healthy until I do. I love you, my sweet Angel._


	10. Chapter 10 - Normal

**Chapter 10**

_Normal – September 7__, 2013_

_Lexi_

I woke up with another towel on my head. Smiling I reached up taking it off and put it into the empty bowl next to me. I felt a whole lot better compared to yesterday. _All thanks to Jackson_. My knight in shining armor, _always_ coming to the rescue…I smiled getting up, stretching, and walked over to the bathroom to brush my teeth.

When I came back out Jackson was still sound asleep. He must be so tired from taking care of me all night, poor thing. I adjusted the blanket to cover him completely and walked over to my nightstand, taking out my pad and pen and took a seat on the window bench by the glass wall overlooking the water.

* * *

_Letter #2_

_My dearest Angel,_

_ One thing you have to know about your father is that he is a determined man. Whatever it is he sets his mind to, he'll make it happen. Mommy was really sick yesterday, but now I feel lightyears better! That's the thing with your Daddy, he takes care of me better than he does himself, and I know for a fact that you will receive the same royal treatment when you finally get here. He and I will love you more than any human being can love another, remember that, always. Whenever life gets you down, when your friends let you down, when the one you love lets you down, we will always be here for you._

* * *

I heard Jackson stirring around, so I quickly ripped the sheet from the pad and folded it up neatly, stuffing it into my purse. His arm moved over my spot on the bed and he shot up when he didn't feel me there. "Baby?" He looked around just about everywhere _except_ for where I was.

"I'm right here, Jax." I giggled.

"What are you doing over there?" he asked rubbing his eyes.

"I was writing out a list."

"A list?" he asked with a confused look. "What list?"

"A grocery list." I lied. "I've been having some trouble sleeping at night, I was wondering if we could get _decaffeinated_ hot tea?" I lied again. Truth is I needed to put a stop to drinking caffeine because of the baby.

"Of course we can. Write down whatever you need and I'll pass it along to Amanda." He ran a hand through his hair and got up, heading toward the bathroom.

"Actually, I was hoping we could do it?" he turned around. "I thought it'd be nice," I shrugged. "It's something normal and you said you loved normal with me."

He smiled. "Of course, princess, we can do that." He turned back around and disappeared into the bathroom. When I heard the sink I quickly pulled the paper back out of my purse.

* * *

_Your father leads an extraordinary life, but in this amazing life he lives, he manages to find time to just be ordinary for the sake of my sanity. It's one of the many reasons why Mommy loves him so much. _

_I have never told him, but it's what makes him extraordinary in my eyes…_

_A prince amongst commoners…_

_One day you will meet your own prince or princess, I'm sure Daddy won't settle for anything less._

* * *

I folded up the paper again stuffing it safely back into my purse. Jackson walked out and headed straight over to me. "Morning, baby." He kissed my forehead. "How are you feeling?" he reached up resting the back of his hand on my forehead. "You're still a little warm, but no fever. That's good." He smiled.

"Thank you, Jax, for taking such good care of me yesterday."

He kneeled down by my feet, taking my hands in his, he kissed them both softly. "What am I here for?" he looked back up to me and gave my hands a light squeeze. "I'm here to make sure you are healthy and happy. What good am I if we stray from that plan, huh?" he reached up stroking my cheek with his thumb. "It really tore me up seeing you like that yesterday. No more getting sick." He said grabbing the nape of my neck, pulling my face down to him.

"Jax, I'm still sick!" I pushed my hands flat against his chest.

"Come on now, baby. It's going to take a hell of a lot more than that to keep me from you." He got up picking me up with him and sat in my seat so I was sitting astride him. He looked up into my eyes, his pale blue eyes filled with so much love. He always looked at me like I was something to worship, in the beginning it was highly uncomfortable, but I've grown to love it, it made me feel special. "I love you, baby." He whispered pulling me down again, successfully making contact with my lips this time. His hands slipped under my shirt, travelling up my bare back and back down, caressing the curves of my ass. He trailed his kisses along my jawline, down until his face was nuzzled in the crook of my neck.

"I'm going to be upset if you get sick. You should take some medicine just in case, I'll add it to the list." I turned to try and reach for it, but he tightened his arms around my waist.

"Let's just sit like this for a moment. It feels nice." He whispered against my neck. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck, leaning my head into him.

"Aren't you hot? I'm still running kind of warm. How long are we going to stay like this?"

"Forever sounds nice." He sighed.

I giggled pulling back. "Come on, feed me." I got up reaching out my hand to him. He looked up at me, pleasantly surprised.

He quickly got up and took my hand leading me to the kitchen. "Thank God." He sounded so relieved. "Amanda?!" his voice was a near shout.

"Jackson, she's right there!" I lightly smacked his arm. She was standing in the corner of the kitchen by the cupboards but he was too excited he must have not noticed her standing there.

"Good morning, Lexi! So good to see you're feeling better." She smiled her warm smile.

"Thank you, Amanda. Your chicken noodle soup always does the trick." I winked.

She smiled again. "It's always my pleasure. What can I make you for breakfast?"

I tried really hard to think of something that sounded good. "How about an egg white Omelette?" I smiled.

"Right away!" She nodded and looked to Jackson.

Jackson leaned in kissing the side of my head. "I'll have the same." Amanda turned and got right to work. "What do you want to do after we go to the store?" he asked taking my hand.

"I'm not entirely sure yet." He pulled on my hand gently, steering me closer toward the stool and guided me to sit. "Can you take me _out_ on a date?"

I caught him by surprise yet again. "Really? We managed to steer clear of the paparazzi, I thought that's what you wanted." He looked at me. "Are you sure you can take them on in your condition?" he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.

I nodded. "Yes, I think so. I mean, I'm feeling _so_ much better. It's just I really would like to go on a date with you, a legitimate one, that's all. I don't think we have really ever done one before. Except for that one night at _Kimono_." I bit my lip.

"Ah, yes, the night at _Kimono_, how could I forget." He pulled my stool closer to him. His lips were touching my ear when he leaned in to whisper, "Should we go to _Kimono_?" My face turned beet red and I looked up to make sure Amanda wasn't watching. She wasn't, thank God. I nudged him away with my shoulder, but he just let out a low chuckle and pulled me in closer.

Raw fish while pregnant wasn't a good idea, I realized. I shook my head. "No, let's go somewhere else."

"Ok, where would you like to go?" he brushed my hair behind my shoulder and planted a soft kiss on the spot below my ear.

"Jax, stop it!" I hissed, smacking his leg.

"What?" He trailed his kisses down to my shoulder.

"Behave yourself! Amanda is here." I tried my hardest to keep my voice down to a whisper. I felt his tongue gliding along my earlobe and I jumped up out of my seat. "Jackson Michael Anderson!" Amanda looked up at me, startled by my outburst.

He threw his head back laughing. "Ok, ok, baby, I'm sorry. Come sit back down." He reached his hand out to me. I shook my head, scowling, and sat in the chair next to the one I was previously in, leaving some space between us. "Baby, I'm sorry. Come back, please?" he patted the stool next to him.

"You will keep your hands to yourself?!"

"I will try," He held his hand out again, waving me over. "Just come here, baby."

I got up and sat back on my original stool. Watching the two of us together, Amanda tried to hide her amusement but completely failed. Setting the plates down in front of us she poured coffee into Jackson's mug, she reached over for mine but I stopped her before she started to pour. "No, thank you, Amanda." She looked up at me. I never reject coffee in the morning. "I would just like some juice please, I want something cold for my throat." that excuse was as good as it was going to get for me. I was a horrible liar. Jackson seemed to buy it, he had already started eating. I doubt he heard anything I said.

She tilted her head to the side but nodded without questioning my choice. She poured some orange juice into my glass and started cleaning up the kitchen. I picked up my fork, joining Jackson.

After we were done with our Omelettes Jackson stood collecting my plate and set it down in the sink. "Thank you, Amanda." She nodded with a smile. He reached up into the cupboard and pulled the bottle of Tylenol out. Emptying two capsules into his hand he handed them to me with a small smile. "You should go call Harper." He said watching me take the pills.

I raised my eyebrows. "Why? Is something wrong?"

He shook his head. "No, nothing like that, you know how she worries. You freaked her out yesterday too, you know."

I nodded. "Ok, I'll go do that now, then." I hopped off my stool and headed to the bedroom.

Picking up my phone I noticed I had already missed a few texts and calls from Harper. I shook my head laughing to myself and dialed her number.

"Hello, are you alive?!"

"And hello to you, bestest friend." I laughed into the phone.

"Oh God, you're laughing. That's a good sign. So, I trust Jackson took awesome care of you in my absence."

"Of course he did, he always does." I felt his arms wrap around my waist and I turned around to face him.

"Good, I'm glad you're ok, sweets." I felt Jackson nibbling on my earlobe again and I tried nudging him off. "Did you tell him?"

"No!" I shouted. Half of the reason being her question throwing me off with him standing so close to me, and the other half of the reason being during the time it took her to ask me that question Jackson had stripped me down to my underwear. "I told you, I was going to wait, Harp." I said lowering my voice back down to a normal decibel. I batted his hands away and tried turning away but he clamped his hands down at the sides of my hips, holding me in place. He hooked his fingers along the waistline of my panties and yanked them down. I hit mute on my phone and looked down at Jackson. "JAX! Do you mind?!" I pointed at my phone.

He chuckled. "No, not at all." He ran his hands up my thighs trailing feather light kisses along my stomach. The intimacy behind this act was completely different for me now, and it took me by surprise.

"Harp, can I call you back?" I tried desperately to keep my voice even.

"Sure! Maybe I can see you soon if you're up for it? I want to see for myself that you're ok." She said. Jackson's tongue made its way to my inner thigh.

"Ok, no problem, Harp. Gotta go! Love you!" I hung up gripping my phone until my knuckles went white. "Jax…" I breathed.

"Hmm?" he trailed his kisses further up and I felt my face burning. "What, baby?"

The warmth of his breath on my thigh sent shivers down my spine. "I'm not going to be able to stand like this for much longer if you go on." I was panting with need. I needed him, _now_. He flicked his tongue over my swollen clit, forcing a loud moan out of me. "Jax, _please_!" I whimpered.

He trailed his kisses back up my stomach, over my chest, to my neck and reached behind me undoing the clasp on my bra. "Wrap your legs around me, baby." His voice was a low rasp. He leaned in crushing his mouth with mine, groaning into my mouth. He grabbed the back of my thighs as I wrapped my legs tightly around his waist. "God, you are so beautiful, Lexi." He walked us toward the bed and gently laid me down.

"I love you, Jax." I reached up cupping his cheek.

He closed his eyes, leaning into my touch and planted a soft kiss in the center of my palm. "I love you most, baby. I love you, _so much_." He whispered, kissing me softly.

* * *

_Jackson_

"Hey Nick, what are you guys doing today?" I decided to call Nick to try and work out a double date situation today. Lexi was in the shower and I figured I'd try and plan something out while I waited for her.

"We don't really have anything planned out, why what's up?"

"I wanted to take Lexi out on a date. Just a normal date, a good old-fashioned date, I really want to take her mind away from my world of craziness for a night." I sighed. "Especially with this business trip coming up," I whispered. I was still disappointed I had to go. When I got back from California the plan was to never leave her here alone again. Work will always get in the way of things. "She wanted a normal night, and that's what I want to give her. You and Harper are part of her _normal_, and I really think she'd enjoy a night out, all of us together."

"Yea, sure, count us in!"

"Great! Thanks Nick." It wasn't a surprise I knew I could count on Nick. They would bend over backwards to please Lexi. "Question, where could we take her?" I was at a loss. "I have never really done normal. What's that like?"

I heard him laughing hysterically. "What? Really? What do you normally do on dates then?"

"Well, I don't know. The last person I dated was Ellie. She and I always had events, dinners, charities, balls, etc. to attend. But, never anything _normal_." I thought about it for a minute. "Dinner at a restaurant is the closest thing to normal I have ever done with her."

"And with Lexi?" he asked. "What the hell have you guys been doing all this time?"

"Well we attended a few things here and there. Went out to dinner a couple times, but for the most part, we'd just stay home. She hates the paparazzi, she tries to avoid them." I explained.

"Oh, man. Bro, you are slacking!"

"Shut the fuck up and help me, Nick!"

He laughed again. "Ok, well in the land of normal, we go out to the movies. If she's sick of the high life and wants to do normal, that's as normal as it's going to get. _After _you wine and dine her of course. You just have _fun_, Jackson. You know, let loose! And NO suit and tie! You were young once, _before_ your billions. Channel that dude for a night!"

"Meet us here around six. Thanks Nick." I said again before hanging up. Lexi came out in her robe just then.

"Did I just hear you talking to someone?"

"Nope, let's get ready." I smiled.

I threw on a pair of my jeans with a light white, v-neck cotton shirt. She took a look at me her eyebrows shot up.

"Casual suits you, Jax." She said with a smile.

She was wearing a white, off the shoulder sweatshirt that was cropped so her midriff was showing, with a pair of dark wash, low waist jeans. "And you." I slid my hand across her stomach and she jumped. "Are you ok?" I dropped my hand. "Are you feeling sick again?"

She shook her head. "No, no I feel great. Just tickles…" she smiled. "Ready to go grocery shopping?!" she looked so excited.

I nodded. "As I'll ever be." I said returning her smile. I took her hand in mine and led her out the door.

We pulled into the parking lot of an organic grocery, _Nature's Table_. It was where Amanda told me she got all of our household items, so I thought I'd just come here. "Is this place ok?" I looked over and asked Lexi.

She nodded with a smile. "Actually, it's perfect. Let's go!" she reached for the door but I stopped her.

"I'll come around to you, just wait." I leaned in to kiss her and got out of the car, walking over to her side. I opened her door and held out my hand to help her out.

"Thank you."

"Of course," I held my hand out to her. "Let's go." I winked. We walked up and pulled out a shopping cart, I lifted her up and she squealed laughing as I put her into the cart.

"Jax, what are you doing?!"

"I don't want you walking around too much. You're getting better, and I don't want to risk you getting worse." I kissed her forehead. "Now, what's the first thing on the list?"

"Decaf tea!" she smiled. I headed over to the tea aisle joking, laughing and horsing around with Lexi in the cart. People were walking by with smiles on their faces, watching us adoringly, whispering, pointing and laughing.

"Which one?" I looked over on the shelf, ready to grab whichever one she picks.

"Hmmm, I don't know, they all sound so good. Give me a minute." She tapped her finger on her chin. I pulled the cart up next to the shelf and dumped them all into the cart. Her mouth fell open and she looked up at me. "Jax! Put these back!"

"You want all of them, so I'll get you all of them."

"Jax! I don't need all this tea!" she looked around eyes wide, she was surrounded by numbers of different flavors. "You are unbelievable!"

"What else, baby?"

"Fruits and vegetables." She was still looking around at the pile of tea all around her. "And this time, I _know_ what I want, so don't even think about it!"

I laughed. "Ok."

The cashier looked at us like we were crazy. We ran out of room in the cart so Lexi had to carry a few items in her lap. "Paper or plastic?" the girl whispered.

I looked over at Lexi and she pulled out the recycled shopping bags Amanda gave to us when we left the house. "We have these." She handed them over to the bagger. He smiled taking it from her and started to bag our items.

"Having a tea party?" the cashier joked.

"She said they all sounded good, so we got all of them." I looked over winking at Lexi, she narrowed her eyes at me.

"Hey, wait a minute. Are you Jackson Anderson?" the girl asked. "Yea, you are! We discuss you a lot in our Business Economics class. I'm a student at UM!"

I shook my head. "No, I'm sorry, you got the wrong guy. I do get that a lot though." I gave her a small smile.

"Oh," she said looking at me again, not really buying it. "Ok, sorry." She scanned the last item and called out my total, I handed her my card and signed the keypad.

"Thank you." I nodded and pushed the cart away from the line.

"Have a nice day!" she called out from behind me.

"Why'd you lie?" Lexi asked confused.

"I wanted today to be normal. Jackson Anderson is anything but." I kissed her forehead.

I opened the trunk to the Porsche. Lexi handed me the bags and I placed them carefully into the trunk. Once I set down the last bag I turned around and lifted Lexi out of the cart.

"Well, that was fun! We should do that more often." I said helping her into the car.

She giggled. "Really? I would love that."

"Really. Watch your legs baby." I smiled shutting the door carefully behind her.

I carried the bags into the house and Amanda got right to work, putting everything away in the kitchen. "That's a lot of tea." She looked at me with wide eyes. "Should I fix you a cup, Lexi?" Lexi nodded smiling. "Which flavor would you like?"

"Pomegranate!" she sat down at the bar, propping her face up in her hands. "Thank you, Amanda."

"What about you, Jackson. Would you like some?" she turned to me.

"Yes, thank you, Amanda."

Amanda fixed us a few turkey sandwiches for lunch and Lexi took her medicine again. She seemed to be recovering nicely, she looked almost completely normal now. _Thank God_. After lunch I forced her to nap before our date night, I wanted her to be energized and feeling at her best. She was sleeping peacefully next to me and I decided to read through some of my work emails.

Judging by Nick's progress with the company, I'd probably be good to take the training wheels off and let him run things by the end of this year. I couldn't wait to spend more _normal_ days with Lexi, to start a family with her. It was time I got my chance at complete happiness, no more running out to last minute meetings or flying out on business trips. All things business would be toned down to a minimum and I couldn't wait. She has been more than understanding so far, but when that day comes, I know she would be ecstatic.

About two hours later, Lexi stirred awake. "What time is it?" she rubbed her eyes.

I heard the doorbell and looked down at the clock on my laptop. "Six." I answered smiling. "I'll be right back." I leaned down, kissing the top of her head.

I answered the door and found a very excited Harper and Nick. "Oh my God, Jackson, I'm so excited! Where's my girl?!" she looked past me.

I laughed. "Good to see you, too, Harper. She's in the bedroom. Come on in." I opened the door wider, inviting them in. She ran past me to the bedroom and Nick walked in patting me on the back.

"I see you have taken my advice on the casual look. You look normal!"

"Thanks, I guess."

"Less intimidating for sure." He said laughing. I heard Harper and Lexi screaming from the bedroom from out in the living room. Nick shook his head. "Those two girls, I swear. You put them together and it's like toddlers on crack."

I threw my head back laughing and headed toward the kitchen. "Beer?"

"_PLEASE_!"

I grabbed two from the fridge and handed one to Nick. Just then Lexi came running from the bedroom with the biggest smile on her face. "Baby!" she jumped up wrapping her legs around my waist. "What are they doing here?!"

"Date night." I smiled.

She leaned in for a kiss, "You're the best!"

I wrapped the one arm I had around her waist, tighter around her. "I try."

She looked back at her friends. "You guys are all dressed casual. Is what I have on ok then?" she looked down at her clothes.

I nodded. "You look perfect." I said without looking away from her eyes.


	11. Chapter 11 - Date Night

**Chapter 11**

_Date Night – September 7, 2013_

_Lexi_

"So, where are we going?" I asked taking his hand. We decided to carpool in Jackson's Porsche since we were all going to the same place.

"Somewhere normal." He looked over to me with a smile. He pulled my hand up to his lips and kissed the back of my knuckles. "I'm sorry I haven't taken you out on a normal date sooner. I feel like a total ass having dragged you out to all of my events now knowing you would have rathered something more low key." he kissed the back of my hand again. "I'll make sure to take you out on a lot more from now on."

"Don't forget us!" Harper chimed in from the backseat.

Jackson laughed. "I wouldn't dare, Harper." Jackson rolled his eyes and I giggled.

I don't remember feeling this giddy and nervous in a really long time. It feels like a _first_ _date! _I bit down on my lip and smiled looking out the window.

"Hey, what are you thinking about?" he squeezed my hand.

"I'm just so happy, _and_ nervous!I don't remember feeling this nervous, it feels like a first date." I looked over at him with a smile.

"Well, it is, I guess." He said smiling in realization. "I feel nervous too, in a good way."

"Can you guys please stop? It's gross." Harper said sliding in between our two seats. "You guys are in love, I get it." She made a gagging motion with her finger.

"Jealous much?" I laughed pushing her back into her seat.

"Always." She deadpanned.

"What are you talking about? You have nothing to be jealous of." Nick grabbed her and started to attack her, tickling her.

She squealed laughing. "Ok, ok, STOP!" she screamed through giggles.

"I will when you stop with the jealousy!" he continued to tickle her, laughing.

Jackson and I were laughing in the front seat. I turned in my seat to watch both of my friends. She truly didn't have anything to be jealous of and she knew it, she just loved to tease Nick. They had such a perfect understanding of each other, absolute soul mates. They knew each other better than they knew themselves.

Harper continued to laugh, thrashing around back and forth, trying to wriggle free of Nick. I leaned my head back on the headrest and looked up at Jackson.

"What, baby?"

"I love you…" I kissed his hands.

"Thank God for that." He whispered. "I love you most, Lexi." He released his hand from mine and placed it at the nape of my neck, his thumb softly stroking my jawline. "We're here." He said pulling into a parking space to a sports bar.

"Sweet! Well done, Jackson!" Nick shouted from the back, patting him firmly on the shoulder.

"_You_ are eating _here?_" I asked disbelievingly.

"_We_ are eating here." He corrected me.

"Have you _ever_ eaten at one of these places? They don't have your fancy wine or champagne here." I teased.

"Hey, I had my college years. I used to eat at places like these all the time back then, baby." He laughed getting out of the car, walking over to my side. Nick did the same for Harper. Both men opened our doors and helped us out of the car. Jackson wrapped his arm around my waist pulling me close, "Let's have some fun."

We walked into the bar and we were greeted by a waitress. "Welcome to _Champ's_, will it be just the four of you today?" she smiled.

"Yes." Jackson nodded.

"Follow me." she led us to a high top by the bar. "Will this table be ok for you?" she asked turning to look at Jackson, and he looked at me.

"Yes, it's perfect." I answered smiling.

Jackson grabbed me by the waist, lifting me up and sitting me in my seat. Nick did the same for Harper. "Thank you." I giggled.

"What can I get you guys to drink?" she asked the table.

"What do you have on draft?" Jackson asked.

"Heineken, Newcastle, Stella…"

"Stella sounds good." He answered.

She looked at the rest of us. "I would like the same." I answered nodding, Harper and Nick quickly agreed to have the same and she turned to fetch our drinks. I looked over at Jackson, "Who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend?" I asked smiling.

"He decided to let loose." He leaned in pulling me close. "But, he's still here, don't worry." He whispered into my ear and I couldn't help but giggle.

"It's so weird to see you in one of these places. Not really the Jackson Anderson I know." I said biting my lip. "But, it's nice. I like it." I reached up, touching his cheek.

"Then I can definitely promise we'll have more dates like these." He kissed my forehead.

The waitress came back with our drinks, we took them happily and clinked glasses before taking our sip of beer. The next hour consisted of nothing but laughs, jokes and light conversation, talk of business wasn't brought up once. We were all truly having a great time. Once we were done Jackson paid the bill and we were out the door.

"Where are we going now?" I asked as Jackson helped me back into the car.

"The movies." He smiled.

"Oh my God, FUN!" I squealed. Once Nick helped Harper into the car and settled in his seat, Jackson pulled out of the parking lot and headed for the theater.

"What do you want to watch, babe?" Jackson slid his arm around my waist and pulled me close. I was looking at the titles displayed across the board, trying to figure out what I wanted to see.

"What about _We Are the Millers_? I love Jennifer Aniston!"

"Yes, please!" Harper turned to the guys.

"Uh, is it a chick flick?" Nick asked.

"Does it matter?!" Harper looked to him threateningly.

"No, it doesn't!" he quickly answered.

"Good answer. But, it's a comedy." She patted his head.

Jackson laughed and turned to the ticket girl. "Four for _We Are the Millers_, please."

She called out the total and Nick slid his credit card through the slot. Jackson turned to him to say something but Nick cut him off. "You're not paying for everything tonight, I can't let you have _all_ the credit." He smiled turning to Harper.

"You little shit, you two are our guests. It's right that I pay." Jackson protested.

"I thank you for the invite, but a date night was long overdue for us too anyway. You did me a favor." He shrugged sliding his arm around Harper's waist. The ticket girl slid our tickets through the slot and we thanked her walking away toward the doors.

The movie was funnier than we all anticipated, but then again Jennifer Aniston never fails to impress. We all laughed so hard throughout, what felt like, the entire movie. The date night Jackson planned was so perfect, drama free, I couldn't have asked for anything more.

"Thank you, Jax. I had so much fun." I leaned over to his seat and kissed him on the cheek. "Tonight was _perfect_."

"You're welcome, baby. But, the night isn't completely over. I thought we could still hang out a little bit." He looked over at me and then back at Nick.

"Ok, yea, what did you have in mind?" I asked.

"I know you were interested in my playing basketball when I was younger, I thought Nick and I could shoot around?" he looked in the rearview mirror at Nick. "You could be there to cheer me on. Be my good luck charm?"

My eyes widened and my eyebrows shot up in attention. "Oh my gosh, I would love that!" I beamed. "I've wanted to see you play ever since you mentioned it the other night!"

Nick groaned. "Bro, I play baseball. I only played basketball recreationally, you will destroy me."

"Good news for me then." Jackson laughed. "Just a friendly game of 21." He promised.

It was almost midnight by the time we got home. Jackson lent Nick a pair of basketball shorts. Harper and I grabbed a few beers and bottled waters from the fridge and we all headed toward Jackson's indoor basketball court, a building separate from the house. There was still so much I had to learn about this mansion he lived in. Also in this building is the indoor gym he was talking about. I may have to come in here for some yoga time, since I couldn't run for another couple months.

"You ok?" he asked pulling me from my thoughts.

"Yes, I'm fine!"

"Are you sure? You can go lie down if you want, you must be tired. You're not a hundred percent back yet, maybe you should get some rest?" he stopped walking to take a look at me.

"Jax, I'm _fine_. Honest!" I reassured him.

He sighed. "Ok." He kissed my forehead. "I just don't want you to get sick again."

"I feel perfect, don't worry. Plus, I wouldn't miss watching you playing basketball for anything." _And shirtless might I add_. He looked absolutely delicious, his shorts were hanging low on his hips and I couldn't tear my eyes away from his more-than-perfectly sculpted body. I looked over and saw Harper drooling over Nick and laughed.

He smiled bending down to kiss me and Nick tossed the ball, hitting Jackson on the back. "Let's do this, bro." Nick said, challenging him playfully.

"Excuse me while I wipe the floors with this douchebag, baby." He kissed my forehead, backing away with a smile. I watched him pick up the ball and dribble it across the court. He looked…different, carefree, and…_younger_? He looked a lot more his age without all the stress he normally carries every day. I could watch him forever, seeing him this happy made me happy. My heart swelled five times its size as I continued to watch him. I couldn't wipe the stupid ass grin I had on my face, and I looked over and saw Harper was having the same problem.

She nudged me with her shoulder. "Are you happy?" she asked with a smile.

"The word _happy_ wouldn't do what I was feeling right now any justice. It's a huge understatement, Harp." I didn't look away from Jackson. My eyes were glued to him.

"I'm so happy for you, sweets. It's so good to see you _this_ happy." She said rubbing my back gently.

"You have no idea just how much." Jackson looked over at me just then, winking with a grin.

* * *

_Jackson_

I don't remember the last time I had this much fun, it felt so good to let loose. I was dragging Nick all across the court. He was _really_ out of shape. Or was it the beer? Whatever it was, I seemed to be fine. It has been a while since I last picked up a ball, but it all came back naturally for me. Lexi was watching me, all smiles. I could see her staring from the corner of my eye, it was cute. I felt like I was in high school again, I felt _young_ again, more my age.

"Come on, Nick!" I teased, dribbling the ball in front of him. He was hunched over, leaning on his knees for support, gasping for air. "Keep up, man!" I weaved by, taking the ball to the hole for an easy layup. He sprawled out on the floor, trying to catch his breath. I threw my head back laughing, he was totally spent. "Harper, I think I broke your fiancé." I teased.

The girls started giggling and Harper got up to tend to her fiancé, Lexi followed shortly, making her way to me. "Here," She handed me a towel, scrunching her nose in the cute way I loved. I took a step forward and she held out her hands. "Jax, don't you _dare_!"

I tilted my head to the side and pretended her words hurt me. "You're disgusted by me?"

"No, but—"

I reached out grabbing her hand and pulled her against me wrapping my arms around her waist. I kissed her, hard. She started squirming, squealing against my lips causing me to laugh, and I started to rub my sweaty face all over hers.

"JACKSON MICHAEL ANDERSON!" she pushed against me.

"Come on, baby. It's just a little sweat." I swatted her ass.

"Gross, Jax!" she wiped her mouth and her face of my sweat.

"Don't call me gross." I pouted playfully, she scowled at me. I laughed pinching her cheek. "How'd I do?"

"Wonderfully, you looked hot, I couldn't take my eyes off of you for a second." She giggled.

"Wanna try?" I held out the ball.

She smiled reaching for it but I held it up over her head. She placed her hands on her hips and glared at me. "Seriously?" I nodded and she hit me in the stomach causing my body to bow forward, creating the perfect chance to steal.

I laughed. "Well played, Ms. Moore." I watched as she slowly dribbled the ball toward the hoop, taking her shot. It hit the rim, bouncing off. "Not bad at all." I chuckled catching the ball. "Care to try that again?" I tossed it to her and shot again, this time making it. "Impressive." I _really_ was impressed, she wasn't bad at all.

"Try not to sound _too_ surprised, I have good hand-eye coordination, Mr. Anderson!"

Harper came out of nowhere snatching the ball. "My turn!" she dribbled the ball and took her shot. _Air ball_, Harper didn't look too pleased.

Lexi and I both laughed while Nick tried his best to stifle his laughter. "Here, babe, let me help you." He walked up behind her with the ball and started to teach her how to shoot.

I walked up behind Lexi and wrapped my arms around her. "Having fun?"

"Tons!" she answered leaning her head back into my shoulder. I kissed the side of her head and trailed kisses down to her shoulder.

"HEADS UP!" I heard Nick shout.

Lexi immediately cringed, curling her body into me and I reached out, catching the ball before it hit her. "Jesus! Are you ok?"

"Yea, I'm fine!" Lexi laughed it off. "Nice aim, Harp. You really suck!" she teased.

"This is why I stick to dance!" she crossed her arms pouting.

It was nearly 2:30 am when we decided to call it a night. We walked Harper and Nick out the door, planning to do it again soon. Lexi yawned, stretching and took my hand leading me to our bedroom.

"Come take a bath with me?" she asked.

"Of course." I answered.

I drew the bath and helped her out of her clothes, pulling her slowly in with me, sitting her down in front of me.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, pulling her close to me.

"I feel fine, I don't feel sick anymore." She turned a little, nuzzling her face into the crook of my neck.

"Good." I whispered, kissing her lightly on top of her head.

"You were amazing today. You're amazing every day, but today you were different. You showed me a completely different side to you, I felt like I had a normal boyfriend for a day. No _billionaire Jackson Anderson_, just Jax." I felt her smiling against my neck.

"Will he be enough?" I asked softly.

She pulled back to look at me, puzzled. "What?"

"Will he be enough?" I repeated. "Jax, I mean. Without the company, will he be enough?" I asked looking into her eyes.

"When you asked me why I loved you the other night, did my explanation have _anything_ to do with your empire?" she asked.

I shook my head. "No."

"Jax, you are everything to me. I didn't fall in love with the CEO of Anderson Enterprises. I fell in love with the man _behind_ all of that. The man I saw today, I love _him_. I noticed a change in you after we got together, a change I love. You're different when you're with me, so much more carefree, _stress_ free. I like being that person for you, the one who keeps you grounded. If the time comes when you are business free and we can live like this forever? I will love you all the same, maybe even more." She reached up, cupping my cheeks in her hands. "Your money, the fancy toys, and the fancy clothes…All of that means nothing to me if I can't have you," She shook her head. "So yes, Jax, you are more than enough. Don't ask me such a silly question ever again." She released her hold on my face and turned back around, leaning back against me.

_Marry me._

"I love you, Lexi Moore." I whispered, wrapping my arms tightly around her waist.

"You better." She muttered.

"Say it, baby, I need to hear it."

She brought her hands down, softly running her hands along my forearms. "I love you most, Jax." She sighed. "You _know_ I do, and I always will."


	12. Chapter 12 - Surprise Visit

**Chapter 12**

_Surprise Visit – September 22, 2013_

_Jackson_

The meetings and plans for the new hospital went smoothly, everything was set and we were good to go. I brought Nick with me on this business trip in plans to introduce him to our clients so they would be comfortable with him while he worked on the project. Henderson and his team were more than happy with our pitch and we would start the actual project this coming week. I told him I would be strictly observing and monitoring the work being done and that I was confident in Nick to take the reins on this project. He was surprisingly ok with it, just as long as I approved all the building projects and promised to check in from time to time.

The amount of paparazzi doubled once they caught word of the new deal my company made with Henderson. Lexi let me know they were following her around once she left the driveway of our house every day, they've become almost impossible to deal with. They would probably be there at the airport today, I know it.

"Hey man, you ok?" Nick's voice cut through my thoughts, pulling me out of my reverie.

"Yea, I'm fine," I answered. "I'll be better once we land." I looked over to the stewardess. "How far are we?"

"We descend in 10 minutes sir." She answered.

I nodded. "Will Harper be there with Lexi?"

"Of course," he said looking down at his watch. "She told me they'd be leaving the house together, they're planning on carpooling to the airport."

"Good, that actually makes me feel better." I sighed. "The paparazzi have been tailing Lexi lately. It puts my heart at ease knowing she has Harper next to her."

"Yea, Harper wouldn't let anything happen to her, don't worry." He patted my back.

"Mr. Anderson, Mr. Johnson, I ask you to please fasten your seatbelts as we prepare for our descent to MIA." The stewardess instructed with a polite smile. We nodded and did as we were told, and my heartbeat picked up. Just a few more short minutes until I got to hold Lexi again, this part is what made our time apart so worth it.

Once the plane slowed to a stop and the stewardess pulled the latch on the door Nick and I shot up to make our exit. We made our way toward the private lobby as fast as we could and saw them waiting for us, grinning from ear to ear.

"Baby!" Lexi squealed, running up to me.

I took a deep breath and held my arms open, reaching out for her. "Honey, I'm home." She jumped up into my arms, wrapping her legs tightly around me, covering my face in kisses. "Miss me?"

"Painfully so." She grinned running her fingers through my hair. "I hope there won't be another business trip for a while?"

I shook my head. "No. Not for a while."

"Promise?"

"I promise, baby." I placed my hand at the nape of her neck, pulling her face down to mine. I noticed flashbulbs going off at the corner of my eye. _What the fuck?_ "I see they followed you to the airport?" I sighed.

"They have been following me everywhere. It's ok though, I've grown used to it while you have been gone." She shrugged.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here to protect you from the dogs." I looked past her again at the paps. "They are ruthless, aren't they?"

"They don't care about anything but their story, it's their job. I can't blame them for doing their job." She ran her fingers through my hair again. "Enough about them, I didn't wait a week to talk about the paparazzi. How was your trip? Was it worth it?"

"Being away from you? Nothing is worth that. But, it went well." Grabbing the nape of her neck, stroking her cheek with my thumb, I kissed her again. I heard the flashbulbs going off like crazy in the back of the room. "Do you guys mind giving me a moment of peace with my girlfriend, please?" I said in a clipped tone.

"Let's just go, put me down, Jax." She whispered.

"No, what for?" I asked, my eyebrows creasing. "I have been waiting a week to hold you, and you want me to put you down because they're watching?" I walked toward the exit of the lobby with no plans of letting her go.

"But, the cameras, they're taking pictures! Jax, I look like a child!" she wriggled around in my arms but I firmly held her against me.

"So, let them take the pictures. I don't care." I muttered walking past the hound dogs. They were following me every step of the way, shouting questions about the upcoming Henderson deal.

"You're making me rethink my choice of greeting you from now on." She leaned away from me crossing her arms against her chest. "I'm just going to shake your hand next time."

"You'd deprive me of my favorite greeting? You wouldn't."

"I would."

"Well, I don't believe you, I will take my chances. I'm not letting you go, baby." I laughed, swatting her ass.

She gaped at me. "You did _not_ just—"

"I did, what of it?" I raised a brow at her.

"_They_ just saw you!" she scolded looking past me.

"I touched what was mine, what does it matter?"

"Jax, you are impossible!" she said sounding exasperated.

I chuckled softly, kissing her lightly on the neck. "I missed you, I can't be held responsible for my actions after being apart from you for a week."

She narrowed her eyes at me, trying to suppress a smile. "Please just take me to the car." she covered her face.

"Kiss me and I will."

"Jax!" she snapped

"Lexi." I retorted.

She sighed in defeat and leaned down for a swift kiss on the lips but I reached up, holding her face to mine. Her eyes widened and she tried pushing against my chest, I smiled against her lips and deepened the kiss. Her body eventually relaxed and her lips parted, allowing me access.

"Jackson Anderson, you're in big trouble." She breathed, breaking the kiss.

"It was worth it." I winked.

After we pushed our way past the paparazzi we piled into the Porsche and I set off for the house.

"So, what have you been up to while I have been gone?" I asked kissing the center of her palm.

"Well, Harper and I hung out whenever I had a spare moment."

"We did a bunch of girly things." She smiled from the backseat.

"Good, I'm glad you weren't alone." I squeezed her hand. "I knew uprooting you guys here would be a brilliant idea." I looked up into the rearview mirror with a smile.

* * *

_Lexi_

_**September 22, 2013 – Letter #17**_

_My dearest Angel,_

_ Your father came back from another one of his business trips. Yes, it is hard to lose daddy for a week at a time here and there every couple of months. But, he's doing it for us. He's doing it to build a better life for you and me. Hopefully in the future his trips are kept to a bare minimum. _

_I know he will do what he can to spend almost every waking moment with you, don't you worry._

_Mommy is about six weeks pregnant now! I have been secretly reading up on pregnancy books that concentrate on your development. They say this week's major development is your nose, mouth and ears finally taking shape! Also, you're about the size of a lentil! So small I can't believe it! _

_I can't wait to hold you in my arms. I love you, sweet angel. Keep growing healthy, that's all that matters to us._

* * *

I was folding up the letter and stuffing it into an envelope when Jackson walked in. "What are you doing, baby?" I dropped the letter into the drawer in my nightstand.

"Nothing, what's up?" I asked. He held the phone out to me and I tilted my head to the side. "Who is it?"

"Answer it." he smiled.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "What are you up to, Anderson?" he shrugged his shoulders and leaned back against the wall. "Hello, this is Lexi." I greeted whoever it was on the other line.

"Auntie Lexi?" the voice that could belong to only one sweet child greeted me from the other side of the line.

I gasped in surprise. "Kali, baby, is that you?" I clutched the phone.

"Mmm-hmm. I miss you, aunt Lexi." She said in her little voice. I clutched my heart leaning back against the headboard, close to tears.

"Oh, sweetie, I miss you most." My ears were stinging with warm tears pricking at the corners of my eyes.

"Nuh-uh, I miss you mostestest. I'm coming to see you!" she giggled.

I laughed. "I know, honey. I can't wait to see you in a couple of weeks!"

"No, silly!" she giggled again. "I'm coming on the big airplane to see you _now_!"

I shot up, eyes wide, mouth open. "What?!" I shouted.

Jackson chuckled softly sitting behind me on the bed, wrapping his arms around my waist. "Surprise." He whispered into my ear. I looked at him in shock.

"She's coming _now_?!" I whispered pointing down into the mattress. He nodded. The tears that were lingering at the brim now made their way down my cheeks. "Oh, Kali, I can't wait to see you!" I clutched the phone tight.

"Me too!" she said, her voice was filled with genuine excitement. "Mommy wants to talk to you." She said.

"Ok, honey, put her on!"

"Bye, aunt Lexi!"

"Bye, sweetie!" I sniffled. Jackson kissed my shoulder lightly and I felt his smile against my skin.

"Hello?" Bree greeted from the other side.

"Bree! What the hell? Why does nobody tell me _anything_?!" I said through tears.

"I take it you're surprised?" she laughed into the phone.

"You suck! The both of you suck!" I turned around glaring at Jackson.

"It wouldn't have been a surprise if we told you now would it?" he raised his brows.

"No, I suppose it wouldn't have."

Bree laughed again. "We're scheduled to take off in about 5 minutes. I'm calling you from Jackson's company jet. So, we should be seeing you guys later on tonight."

I looked down at my watch, almost 11 o'clock. "What time will your flight be getting in?"

"Around 7pm. We miss you, Lex!" she beamed.

"I miss you guys too! So much!" I wiped away my tears. "How long will you be staying?" It would be hard to say goodbye again, but I was so glad they were coming.

"A few weeks!" she answered and I smiled. A few weeks with Bree and Kali, I couldn't wait!

"They don't mind you being gone so long back at the hospital?"

"Yea, they don't mind. I just used up my vacation days for the year." She explained.

"And Kali's travel paperwork? There were no complications?"

"Nope, Jackson took care of that _weeks_ ago!" she answered. "You know him, Mr. Bossy!" I laughed at the sound of that, _Mr. Bossy_, too funny! I heard the stewardess talking to Bree and Kali in the background. "Ok, thank you." She answered her. "Lex, I gotta go! We're taking off in a second!" she squealed! "Can't wait to see you guys, give Jackson a hug for me!"

"Ok, I will!" I replied hanging up. I turned around to face Jackson. "I can't believe you, when did you have time to reschedule their whole trip?"

"Well, you weren't around to catch me planning anything in Vegas. So, while I had nothing to do I was on the phone the whole time. It wasn't too difficult, I just discussed Bree's availability, she worked it out with the hospital and I made the necessary arrangements with our company jet." He shrugged. "You were more than understanding about this business trip. I wanted to do something nice for you." He brushed a strand of my hair behind my ear. "I love you, baby. I just want to see you happy." He stroked his thumb along my cheek.

"You are too much!" I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.

"In a good way, right?" he asked.

I let out a little laugh. "_Always_!" I replied. "They're staying here right?! We have all this room!" I said in a near panic.

"Yes, baby, they're staying here." He laughed at my reaction. "Although, I am going to miss all this _alone_ time." He pulled me close, nuzzling his face in my neck.

"Wait!" I jumped up, away from him. "We need to go set everything up for them, like their rooms and stuff. Plus, I want to get Kali something!"

"Can it wait? I just got home, baby. I want to spend some 'time' with you, _please_?" he reached up to grab my waist but I batted his hand away.

"No, it can't wait. Come on, Jax." I reached my hand down to him.

He took it and yanked me down. I squealed in surprise when he had me pinned down against the mattress in two seconds flat. "Jax!" I pushed against his chest but he wouldn't budge.

"I haven't seen you in a week. We're going to make up for that first before I do _anything_, or it will be the only thing I think of all day. And you don't want me groping you in public. Trust me, Lexi." He tore at my clothes, stripping me down to my lacy, pink bra and matching panties. His eyes travelled down my body, softy groaning. "I missed you, baby." He whispered.

* * *

After getting sidetracked a time or two or _three_, we finally got to the kids' store. I made sure to pile in everything Kali may need during her stay into the cart. I got her a few stuffed animals to comfort her, I wanted Jackson's place to feel like a home away from home for her. If she felt comfortable enough, maybe they could visit more often. I would love for our little angel to grow up with Kali. Kali would love her…or him.

"What are you thinking about, baby." Jackson's voice startled me and I jumped. I didn't even hear him coming up behind me.

"Jesus, Jax! You startled me!" I reached up, placing my hand over my heart.

He walked up wrapping his arms around me. "I'm sorry, baby. What were you thinking about? You looked like you were about a million miles away." He kissed the side of my head.

"Nothing, just…" I bit my lower lip. I needed to tell him soon, the eighth week checkup was coming up soon.

"Just what?" he ran his hands up my arms.

"I just wish Kali and Bree lived closer." I lied. _Coward_.

"Me too." He said softly, continuing to rub my arms. He looked down at the cart and laughed. "Did you get enough?"

I laughed. "Not even close!"

"You spoil that girl rotten." He shook his head.

"Let's stop by _Cover Me Up_. I want to look at some comforters for Kali's room!" I turned around and threw in another stuffed animal into the cart.

Jackson walked over to my side of the car and helped me out. When we walked into the store I headed straight for the comforters. Jackson stayed close as I walked through the aisles, looking through each and every design. I looked and looked until I finally found one I really liked. It was a pale pink color with beautiful flower patterns stitched in yellow thread.

"This is beautiful!" I bent over to pick one out for a queen size bed.

"Baby, I got it, leave it." He hurried over to help pick it up off the shelf. "This is the one you want?" he asked me.

"Yes, I think it's perfect for Kali." I smiled running my hands over the comforter. "Do you think she will like it?"

"Yea, she'll love it." he ran his hand through my hair, kissing me softly. "You're going to be a great mom, Lexi."

My eyes snapped up to meet his. "What?"

"I love watching you when we talk about or do anything concerning Kali. You light up, your mood picks up and you just have this glow about you. I love it, and I _know_ you'll make a great mom one day. To _our_ child." He said softly, stroking my cheek.

"Jackson…" I whispered.

"Hmm?"

"I need to tell you something…"

"What is it?" he looked at me intently. As soon as I opened my mouth to tell him his phone rang. "Hold that thought, baby. I gotta take this." His expression changed, it was different. Cold? "Jackson Anderson." He answered in a clipped tone. "Davies, what is it?" his voice was impatient now. He saw me watching him and he kissed my forehead before walking away.

His demeanor after we left the store was completely different. He was distant in the car, he looked so far away. I wanted to ask what was wrong but I was afraid to pry, so I decided to be as light as I could. I opened his palm up to me and kissed the center of his palm. "Is everything ok, Jax?" he didn't hear me. "Jax?" I tried calling him again.

He looked at me, "Huh?"

"Is everything ok?" I repeated.

"Yea." He whispered. He cleared his throat, "Yes, everything is fine." he answered. He's lying.

"Ok." was all I could say to that.

Jackson pulled us up into the driveway and put the car in park. I got out quietly and grabbed the bag of stuff we got, taking it into Kali's room. Jackson followed close behind with the bags I couldn't grab and the new comforter we bought setting it down on the floor.

"I got it from here thank you." I said softly. I picked up her new stuffed animals and set them on the window bench by the wall. My favorite out of the bunch, a light caramel colored teddy bear, I set on the center of the bed, leaning it against her pillows. I took the coloring books out of the bag and put them on the bookshelf next to the desk, pulled out the box of crayons, color pencils and markers and set them on the desk.

"Lexi…" he started to say.

"Jax, I just need a minute. I want to set this room up in peace, I don't want to fight in here." I tried my best to swallow the big lump forming in my throat. I could still feel him behind me, watching me. "Jax, please leave. I'll talk to you later." I tried my best to remain patient. I took out the new rug we bought and set it down along the far wall, designating it the _play area_, and bent down to set down her new toys in a neat line. I got up and headed back to the pile of bags when he caught my hand.

"Baby, stop," He pleaded with me. "I'm sorry, I lied. But, just know that everything _will be_ fine. I promise."

"What is it?" I asked finally facing him.

"Nothing for you to be concerned about." He said.

"You _are_ my concern, Jackson." he winced at my use of his full name.

"I'm taking care of it." was all he could say.

"So, you're not going to talk to me about this?" I couldn't believe him.

He shook his head slightly. I yanked my hand free from his and turned around picking up the new comforter.

"Get out, Jackson."

"Baby…"

"_Get . Out . Jackson._" I rested my hands on top of the packaging with my head down. My voice was shaky from choking back tears. I waited until I heard him leave before I let it out. _When will it stop_? The dishonesty, the lies…How am I supposed to raise a baby around this sort of uncertainty?

I placed my hand over my stomach, over my little angel. I wanted to tell him so bad, I wanted him to be a part of all of this. But, how am I supposed to tell him when there's always something around the corner that needed his immediate attention? I quickly shook the thoughts from my head before unzipping the packaging and pulled out Kali's new comforter.

I set everything up with a smile, tucked the sheets in neatly, stuffed the pillows into the pillowcase and neatly spread the comforter over the bed. I lightly set down her new teddy bear in the center against the pillows and took a step back.

_Perfect_.

I headed for the door and took one last look at the room before closing the door shut behind me.


	13. Chapter 13 - Protection

**Chapter 13**

_Protection – September 22, 2013_

_Jackson_

_ Idiot…Idiot…Idiot…_

_ Fucking IDIOT!_

* * *

_Lexi_

For the rest of the day I avoided making any contact with Jackson. It was challenging, yes, given we live in the same fucking house, but I made it work. I was born a stubborn, complicated woman. But, now I was pregnant. Pregnant, stubborn and complicated turned out to be the worst mix possible in any breed of woman. I was sitting in his study with a book in my lap, my mind wandered off about over a dozen times. It was doing its wandering thing again as I played with a loose thread on the stitching of his leather chair, staring off into space. I sighed as I let my mind take me away for the twentieth fucking time today.

I love Jackson so much there was no question in my decision of a future with him. He was _my person_. He is _the one_. If he were to ask me to marry him I would marry him tomorrow. But, things were just so complicated now. I'm no longer making a decision for myself. I'm making a decision for another human being, one that solely counted on _me_, depended on _me_. I had to make sure we were safe, _always_.

The minute the doctor told me I was pregnant a switch went off in me. Suddenly everything I did had me on high alert, everything around me so _magnified_. What didn't seem too big of a deal to others meant a great deal to me. Things that made others sad, was tragic for me. Things that made others happy, made me feel euphoric. This baby growing inside of me _owned_ every part of me now. Everything and everyone else came second.

I heard him walk in and I snapped my head to the side toward the door. He closed the door and stood against it. His face was full of suffering and he looked like he was about to break. I really wasn't in the mood for a conversation so I got up and walked over to the bookcase stuffing the book back onto the shelf.

I knew there was no point but I made my attempts to exit the room anyway. He watched me as I made my way toward him. He stood blocking the door, deadly still.

"Stop this, Lexi." He whispered.

"Move, Jackson."

"Please stop avoiding me, I can't take this anymore." He begged.

"You're lucky I haven't walked out the front door yet. The _only_ thing stopping me is Bree and Kali!" I snapped.

He clenched his jaw tightly shut and looked down to the floor. "I deserved that," he mumbled. "It hurt, but I deserved it."

"Yes, you do."

"But…"

"But, _nothing_!" I cut him off. "I'm not talking about this with you, I'm sick of having the same conversation with you, Jackson! We agreed to _honesty_, remember?! I could have sworn you were present for that conversation, were you not?!" he opened his mouth but I held up my hand to stop him. "No, you know what? Don't answer that. I'm done talking about it. Please, MOVE!" I grabbed the door handle and pulled on it but he stood unmoving. "Move, Jackson."

He shook his head slowly, his eyes misting over. "No." he whispered. "I need you to just understand where I'm coming from and let this go."

"Understand? Are you listening to yourself right now? Something is bothering you, but you want me to sit by and ignore it. To _understand_ it?! What is it that has you so stressed all of a sudden?"

"Baby, _please_," he reached for my hands, but I jerked them away from his reach. "You need to understand, the less you know, the better."

"What?!" I breathed, stepping back. "So, this _does _have to do with me?" I gasped. "Am I not _safe_ here, Jackson?!" I asked horrified. My reaction kicked in faster than his answer. "Move!" I shoved him out of the way and made my way toward our bedroom.

I needed to get out of here. I needed to get far away from whatever situation he's tangled in that puts me in harm's way. I grabbed my purse and turned back around to head back out the door. I walked across the living room and toward the front door when I saw him coming out of the study, he saw me, purse in hand and his eyes widened in shock.

"Where are you going?"

"Back to my condo." I walked past him.

"I thought you weren't leaving? What about Bree and Kali?" He started to panic.

"Apologize to them for me. I can't be here if whatever this is has to do with me. If I'm not safe here, I don't want to be here." I grabbed the doorknob and pulled the door open.

"Lexi, _PLEASE!_" he shouted after me, following me down the steps.

"No, Jackson, I have to go." I clutched my keys tightly in my hand in case he attempted to yank them out of my hand. I hit the unlock button and grabbed the door handle.

"Please, I beg of you, Lexi!" he gripped my elbow and pulled me back to him. "Stay. _Please_ stay where I can keep an eye on you. How am I supposed to protect you when you're not here?"

"Protect me how exactly? You can't even tell me what's going on. How are you planning to protect me, Jackson? Tell me." I felt the hot tears stinging my eyes. "Tell me and I will stay." I whispered, begging. He stood there staring back at me, not knowing what to say. I shook my head and the tears slid down my face. "Bye, Jackson. I'm sorry." I gripped the door handle again, opening it and got inside.

Before I could lock the door he yanked it open and pulled me out. "Lexi, God damn it!"

"Jackson, let go!" I said through gritted teeth.

He pulled on my hand, dragging me back toward the front door of the house. I tried jerking my hand out of his grip but there was no point. I started smacking his arm with my free hand but he just took it.

"Jackson, stop it!" I screamed through tears, sobbing. "You're hurting me, let go!" he threw me over his shoulder and carried me inside. "Jackson, let me go!" I screamed hitting his back repeatedly.

"No fucking way!" he growled. He walked into our bedroom and threw me on the bed. I got up but he pushed me back down, kneeling in front of me.

"Are you fucking crazy?!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, hitting him, unable to gain control of my emotions.

"Lexi, stop!" he held both my wrists in his left hand, grabbing the nape of my neck with the other. He pulled my face closer to him so I could meet his eyes. "Stop." He said calmly. "Please, listen to me." he whispered, trying to keep his breathing under control.

"Why? Are you _actually_ going to tell me?!" I snapped.

"Yes."

"What?" I asked surprised.

"Yes, Lexi, God damn it! I will tell you, if you just _stop_." He whispered roughly, his voice nearly a rasp. "I didn't _want_ to tell you. In order to protect you, I was planning on keeping it from you." He let out a sigh of exasperation. "If you hear what I have to say there's a chance you will walk out that door, that's why I wanted to keep it from you until I had the situation under control." He explained. "But, you were about to walk out on me anyway, and I can't have that, so I will tell you." His breathing slowed to a steadier pace. "Are you ready to listen?"

I nodded. "Yes."

He released my wrists and lowered his hand from the nape of my neck. He continued to kneel in front of me, wrapping his arms around my waist this time, he took a deep breath and began to tell me. "I've been receiving weird letters, all of them concerning you. They're threatening to hurt you. I need you here so I can _protect_ you, baby. Do you understand me?"

"What?! NO! What do they want?"

He tightened his arms around me. "I'm heightening security around here, and I'm assigning two bodyguards to protect you. They will be with you _at all times_. You are not to defy me for any reason, and you will let them do their job in protecting you. _Do you understand me_?!"

"Jackson…"

"DAMN IT, LEXI! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!" he shouted.

My eyes watered over, unblinking, I stared at him speechless. "Jackson! What the fuck?!" I hissed.

"I'm not playing around, tell me you understand what I'm telling you!" he grabbed me firmly by my arms. He had tears in his eyes and he looked _afraid_, I've never seen him like this before.

"Jackson, if you are _this_ afraid, what the hell am _I_ to do?" my head was spinning. What do I do now?

"You do absolutely _nothing_. All you need to do is let me and my men protect you. _Please_." He laid his forehead in my lap. "I can't lose you, Lexi. This isn't a joke, let me protect you." He whispered, sounding emotionally and physically drained.

I ran my fingers through his hair. "Ok." I whispered.

He raised his head to look at me "Ok?"

"Ok." I nodded.

He breathed a sigh of relief, kissing my hands. "Thank you, baby," he trailed his kisses up my arm to my lips. "I love you. I love you so much. I'm so, so sorry. I will take care of this, I promise you." He cradled my face in his hands. I looked up at him not knowing what to say. "Baby, say something, please." He looked into my eyes, trying to figure out what I was thinking. _I_ didn't even know what I was thinking, my head was spinning. I felt sick. "Baby?"

"Do we know who this is? Any idea of who it may be?" I asked, still in the state of shock.

He looked at me and shook his head slowly. "No, not yet."

"Do we know why?" a tear slid down my cheek.

He shook his head again. "No."

"Do we know _anything_?" I breathed.

"We're working on that now, baby. Let me worry about all of that."

"Just promise me you won't run, stay here where I can protect you. Can you promise me that?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"What do you mean?" his brows creased together.

"I'll be safer here with you and your bodyguards. Where else am I going to go when someone out there is threatening to hurt me, Jackson?"

"Again, I'm so sorry." he held me close.

* * *

_Jackson_

I lied. I lied _again_.

_FUCK!_

* * *

_Lexi_

"Are you ready, baby?" Jackson called from the living room.

"Yea, just give me a sec!" I called out from the bedroom, I was sitting at the vanity trying my best to cover up my swollen, puffy, red eyes.

"Hey, are you ok?" I looked back to find him leaning against the door frame, watching me.

"I'll be fine." I answered, applying eyeliner generously over my lids in attempts to cover up. "What time is it?"

"Six o'clock." He said looking down at his watch. "Take your time, there's no rush." He said softly, walking up to me. He set his hands on my shoulders, gently massaging. I threw my makeup down on the counter and buried my face in my hands, bawling, for the tenth time today. "I'm sorry, baby." He leaned down kissing the top of my head. "I'll give you a minute." His voice was weak, and shaky if I heard right.

I know how he must be feeling. He's blaming himself for sure, I know. This wasn't his fault, but I was just too freaked out to comfort him right now. I didn't know what I was supposed to do, how am I supposed to protect our baby under all of this stress? I held the diamond pendant from my necklace between my fingers, saying a silent prayer and I adjusted my makeup, _again_.

I headed to the closet, trying to pick out something presentable to wear but had no luck, I felt too distracted. I walked out toward the living room and found Jackson sitting on the couch hunched over, elbows resting on his knees, face resting in his hands. He looked beat.

"Jax…" he quickly turned to look at me. I couldn't stay upset forever, it was starting to take its toll on him, and me.

"Yea, baby?" his eyes were red.

"Come here." I held my hands out. He shot up and made his way over to me taking my hands.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No. I just need your help." I led him into the room, toward the closet.

He looked at me confused. "What is it?"

"Well, I can't find anything to wear." I said sighing, trying to change the tone of our situation a little bit. "I would like you to help me choose," I leaned against the door frame to our closet, crossing my arms over my chest. He looked at me, puzzled. "You know, since you're the one who has to look at me all day." I said winking with a small smile.

Leaning a hand against the frame he stepped in closer to me. "I love you, Lexi." He whispered. "You have no idea just how much," He kissed the side of my head. "And I would do _anything_ to keep you safe, you have to know that." He softly kissed the corner of my mouth.

"I love you most, Jax."

He let out the breath he was holding, pressing his forehead to mine. He reached into the closet without looking and pulled out my black spaghetti strap romper. He handed it to me and backed away.

"This one?" I held it up.

"Whichever one, it doesn't matter. Whatever you do decide on, you need to put it on now. We'll never make it out of here on time if you don't get dressed." He looked down at my chest. I followed his gaze and saw my bra was peeking out of the robe. "Bree will flip her shit if we're late, and I don't want to deal with that right now." He smiled at me walking back out to the living room.

I quickly got dressed and walked out to the living room. "I'm ready."

He looked up from his phone and smiled at me. "Let's go." He stood up taking my hand.

After helping me into the car we set off for the airport. He didn't let go of my hand once during the whole drive there, I would think it was sweet if I wasn't so scared. I wish I didn't have a thousand things on my mind right now, especially today. I should be feeling nothing but excitementright now, but instead I'm feeling about 50 different shades of emotion. Bree and Kali were finally visiting, why couldn't life just be fair and let me be freely excited about their visit? Oh right, life _isn't_ fair.

Jackson pulled into a parking space in the garage and took my hand, leading me into the airport. He made his way toward the private lobby, looking down at his watch. "They should be here." He pulled me close. "Are you excited?" _Ugh, that question_. _How do I answer that question?_

"Yes." I managed to smile. I didn't want him thinking about this anymore, I will do what I can to keep his mind off of it for as long as I can.

"There," he pointed at the plane pulling in toward us. "They're here." My heartbeat picked up and it felt like it was going to blow out my chest.

Oh my God, I can't wait! I watched as the plane came to a complete stop. After what seemed like _forever_ later the door popped open and I caught glimpse of little Kali with Bree, walking carefully down the stairs. I fought the urge to run down there to greet them. Instead, I stayed put and waited as patiently as I could, practically jumping up and down.

The door to the lobby finally opened and I watched as little Kali came running in my direction, giggling. I bent down, kneeling so she could run into my arms. I nearly died at the feeling of her little arms tightly wrapped around me behind my neck, squeezing me in a tight embrace.

"I missed you, Aunt Lexi!" she squeezed harder.

"Oh, honey, I missed you most." I squeezed her back, tears stinging. I turned to Jackson, "You're right, this greeting _is_ the best." I whispered tearfully.

He winked. "Told you." He reached up grabbing the nape of my neck and pulled me in, kissing my forehead. He moved over and kissed Kali lightly at the top of her head. "Missed you, kiddo." He reached up tousling her hair.

"I missed you too, Uncle Jack!" she smiled.

"Uncle Jack?" he raised his brows, laughing.

She nodded. "Jackson is too long." She said crinkling her nose.

I threw my head back laughing. "Very true." I agreed, squeezing her tighter to me.

Bree laughed pulling me in for a hug. "I missed you, sis!" she squeezed me tight. Right here, like this, I wish time would freeze. It felt so good to be in a Bree and Kali sandwich again, I missed them so much.

"I missed you too." I breathed out. "I hate that you guys live so far away." I said looking back down at Kali, who was now playing with the diamond around my neck.

"This is pretty, Aunt Lexi. And sparkly." She smiled holding it up to the light.

"Thanks honey. Uncle Jack gave it to me." I smiled at her. "One day your boyfriend will give you one of these."

"If I don't kill him first," Jackson cut in.

Kali gasped. "Uncle Jack! That isn't very nice!" she shook her finger at him.

"Uncle Jack is just being protective, sweetheart." I turned my head to look at Jackson. "It's what he does best." I looked back at Kali with a smile.

Jackson drove us home where Amanda had dinner waiting. "Whoa, what's will all the suits?" Bree looked at the men guarding the gates to the driveway.

"I'll explain later, Bree." Jackson said turning to talk to one of the guards. He whispered, keeping his voice low, so we wouldn't have to hear him but I got the gist of it. "Did you run into any problems?" the guard shook his head. "Great, thank you." He pulled the car up the driveway. Where there were a couple more guards by the house.

"Seriously Jackson, what is this?" she looked to her brother.

"I will tell you _later_, Bree." He did his best to hide his annoyance. He looked at Kali and then looked back to his sister. She got the hint and dropped it.

I got out of the car before Jackson could come around to open it for me. I didn't want to spend another minute talking about this anymore. I opened the back door where Kali was sitting in her booster seat and I unbuckled her, taking her out with a smile.

"Are you hungry, honey?"

She nodded. "Yes, what are we having?"

"Ms. Amanda is baking you some nuggets! How does that sound?"

"Sounds yummy!" I giggled, kissing her on the cheek.

"Alright, let's get you inside then so you can start eating!" I headed toward the house and walked in with her in my arms.

I walked into the kitchen to introduce her to Amanda. She looked up from the stove with a wide toothy smile. "Well, hello there!" she wiped her hands on a towel and walked up to us.

"Amanda, this here is Kali." I smiled. "Kali, this is Ms. Amanda, she's super nice!"

"Nice to meet you." She stuck out her hand to Amanda, and I giggled. Kali's manners were always on point. I always said she was a twenty year old trapped in a three year old's body.

Amanda shook Kali's hand nodding, chuckling softly. "Indeed, it's so nice to meet you too, Kali!"

We sat at the dining table as a family and had dinner. For the first time today my mind was clear of all the crazy drama. We laughed and caught ourselves up on everything we've missed from our time apart. Kali seemed so much happier now. Living with Bree has really made a difference.

After dinner Jackson took Bree into the study, it was most likely to catch her up on what has been happening. So, I decided to take Kali up to the room she'd be using for the next couple of weeks.

"Come with me, honey. I got you a couple of things today and I want you to see them." I took her hand and led her up the stairs.

"Ohmygosh, more presents?!" she sounded so excited, trying to rush up the stairs.

"Of course, honey! I will try my best to get you gifts every time you visit! So try and talk your mommy into coming more often." I looked down and winked at her.

She giggled, clapping her little hands together. "Thank you, thank you so much, Aunt Lexi!"

I laughed at her enthusiasm. "Sweetie, you haven't even seen your gifts yet!"

"It won't matter, I am grateful for them already. I never got gifts from my other mommy and daddy." My heart tore in two.

I bit back my urge to cry and took her hand, leading her down the hall to her room. "Well, you better get used to it now." I whispered. I opened the door to the room and she gasped.

"This is _my_ room?!"

I giggled, running my hand through her hair. "Yes, baby, this is _your_ room. Whenever you visit, this will always be your room." I rubbed the back of her head. "So, come whenever you want."

She hugged my leg tight. "Oh, Aunt Lexi, I love it, I love it!" she jumped up and down. "Can I go look at my new toys?"

I kneeled down in front of her. "Kali, all of this stuff is yours. You can do _whatever_ you want with them. You don't need to ask me, sweetie." She smiled and walked further into the room. You could tell she didn't know where to start. She stood at the center of the room, looking around for a moment before walking over to the bed and picked up my favorite teddy bear. She held it against her and headed to her play area to look at her new toys.

Why people who clearly couldn't handle parenthood became parents was beyond me.

She had the hugest smile on her face as she checked out each new toy, giggling. It was very simple to make a child happy, and it took very little effort in doing so. I never understood how anyone could fail at that.

She looked up at me from the rug. "I love you, Aunt Lexi. Thank you so much!" she smiled.

I quickly wiped the tear from my cheeks. "Oh honey, you're always welcome." I walked into the room and sat next to her.


	14. Chapter 14 - Trust

**Chapter 14**

_Trust – September 22, 2013_

_Jackson_

After dinner I asked Bree to follow me into the study. She walked in, quietly, behind me and shut the door. "Alright, do you mind catching me up now?" she placed her hands on her hips. "What is with the detailed security team around your house, Jackson?" Bree was growing impatient.

I plopped down on my desk chair, bringing my hands up to my face, squeezing my eyes tightly shut. "Bree, sit down."

"What is it, Jackson?"

"Bree, for fuck's sake, sit down so I can tell you!" I snapped.

She took a seat in the chair across from me on the other side of the desk. "What the fuck, Jackson?!" she snapped back at me. "Are Kali and I going to be safe here?!"

I ran my hands through my hair. "Would I have asked you to come if I knew you wouldn't be safe here?" I was starting to lose my patience.

"What is it, Jackson? Tell me."

I reached into my pocket for a small set of keys and unlocked the bottom drawer to my desk. Pulling out the folder, I tossed it on the desk in front of Bree. She emptied the contents onto the desk and shuffled through the letters, one by one.

"What the hell is all of this?" she whispered, continuing to read through them. She looked up at me gripping the letters tightly in her hands. "Someone is threatening to _kill_ Lexi?"

Tears flooded my eyes as I looked across the desk to my sister. "Yes." I breathed the word softly.

"Give them what they want, Jackson." She said, her voice shaking and hands trembling. "What do they want?!"

"I've read those letters, forwards and backwards, about a million fucking times." I said through gritted teeth. "None of those letters state they want something in return for Lexi's life, none of the letters assures me of her safety if I were to give in to their demands. They ask nothing of me, it's a one sided threat on her life, Bree." I gripped the arms of my chair.

"Does Lexi know about this? She seemed fine this whole time?" she shook her head trying to make sense of the situation.

"I gave her a different version of the situation, I spared her the details. She doesn't need to know everything right now, Bree." I sighed, bringing my hand up to my face, pressing my thumb and finger firmly down over my eyelids.

"What the fuck are you talking about, Jackson? She needs to know!"

"Jessica Bree Anderson, you keep your fucking voice down!" I hissed, shooting up in my chair leaning across the desk with my palms flat on the desk. "You didn't see what I saw today! You don't know how freaked out she was when I was only _beginning_ to tell her about the letters," I pushed up off my hands, shoving them into my pockets, looking down to the floor. "She was prepared to leave me today, Bree." I looked up, her face was unreadable. "I need her here with me where it's _safe_, it would be impossible for me to protect her if she walks out that door." I pointed toward the front door. "You don't understand." I shook my head. "It's hard to put into words what Lexi truly means to me," I held my hands behind my head and started to pace. "Just the _thought_ of ever losing her in _any_ way is unbearable." I let out a long, shaky breath. "I will do everything in my power to protect the woman I love, even if it means withholding a _bit_ of the truth from her."

"So, what _does_ she know, Jackson?"

"That someone out there has sent me a few letters, that someone out there wants to _hurt_ her, and that I don't know who this person is."

"I don't understand…" she looked down at the letters again. "Who would do this?" she asked. I clenched my jaw tight, and looked away. Her eyes widened, locking into mine. "Jackson, do you know who these letters are from?" she gasped, her voice barely a whisper.

"Yes."

"Who?"

"There's a photo in that folder of the person we suspect. It's a frame shot from the security footage we pulled up," I watched as she pulled the photo from the folder. "It was taken last week, while Nick and I were on our business trip in Vegas. There was no return address, and it wasn't stamped. So, I knew it had to have been delivered personally. I had the security team run the tapes over and over again until they came across this shot." I pushed the photo she was looking at aside, pulling out the enhanced version of the previous photo.

Bree's hands shot up, covering her mouth. "Brad?" she shook her head looking up at me, her eyes wide with horror.

"Brad _fucking_ Davis!" I answered, gripping the edge of my desk, barely able to contain my rage.

"No fucking way it's him, Jackson. Are you sure?" she asked in disbelief. "He stuck by you after Ellie died, he couldn't have done this to you. He loved you, Jackson."

I pulled one of the letters out of her hands and pointed down to the last line. "Read that."

"_I will take what you took from me_." She read aloud. She shook her head. "What does he mean? What did _you _take from _him_?"

"We ran into Brad one night at _Tryst_, he was completely shitfaced, and he put his hands on Lexi. Like I said, I protect the woman I love. So, I kicked the shit out of him, fired him and replaced him, all in one night." I sighed shaking my head. "The week after the incident I received a call saying I was needed in LA because Brad fucked up big time. He left so many loose ends on our building project out there. Mistakes he usually _never _made." I turned to her. "He left a bunch of paperwork incomplete, permits he never got approved, etc. _I_ had to go to fix his careless mistakes, because this was after I had already fired him. That's why I was out there that week, do you remember?"

She nodded. "I remember."

"So, I did some digging, wondering how he could have made those mistakes at such a crucial time on the current project. Turns out he's been getting into some dark shit behind my back."

"Like what?" she asked, baffled.

"Drugs," I answered. "And I _can't_ have that kind of image around my business. I can't have my _second in command_, the _head_ of my Construction Administration department, build up that sort of reputation, Bree. I'm watched like a hawk by the paparazzi, my life is lived under a fucking microscope for Christ's sake!" she nodded her head, taking in all the newfound information. I sighed walking over, sitting at the edge of the desk, facing her. "He came to me about a month and a half ago." Her eyes widened as she looked up at me again. "He came begging for his job back, he told me his wife would take the kids and leave if he lost his job." Bree looked confused. "She had also found out about what he has been into these past few months. She was already hanging from the thinnest of strings, she must have left him when he lost his job." I explained to her.

"Oh my God, that's a shitload of information to take in." she sighed. Bringing her hands up to her face, she leaned her head back in the chair. "Where is he now?"

"We don't know." I shook my head. "He has completely fallen off grid. I can't take any chances here, and that is why I had you come earlier than we had planned. He knew you well, he knows where you live…You're safer here too, where I can keep an eye on both you and Kali."

"Jesus fucking Christ, Jackson." She whispered into her hands.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath out. "I'm sorry, sis." I whispered back. "I don't know what else to do."

She dropped her hands down to her lap and looked up at me with tired eyes. "We'll figure this out together." She looked up at me, trying to give me a small smile. "Are we on house arrest until then, how does this work?" she asked confused.

"You're not on house arrest. But, I'd like you to let me know _every time_ you do decide to go somewhere." I said sternly. "You and Lexi will be watched at all times, I have two men I handpicked myself to protect the both of you."

A soft knock came from the door and both of our heads snapped to the side. "Yes?" I called out. I turned my gaze back down to Bree, "Don't say _anything_ to Lexi." I whispered. My eyes hardened as I looked into her eyes to make sure she understood me, she quickly nodded. "Come in." I said a little louder. I saw Lexi poke her head in and I smiled. "Come in, baby, you're fine." I kept my voice light. I didn't want her to know what we were talking about, I really wanted her to take her mind completely off of it, but of course that was impossible.

I watched her walk into the room and pushed myself off the desk, walking toward her. I met her half way and held out my hands, she took them gently and I held her hands up to my lips, kissing them softly. She gave me a small smile and looked down at where Bree was sitting.

* * *

_Lexi_

They were talking about me, I could feel it just standing in this room. Bree smiled at me, trying to play off _normal_, it didn't work. I decided to humor them both and smiled taking Jackson's hands in mine.

"Hey sis, does Kali need me?" she started to get up but I shook my head.

"No, I actually put her down, she's sleeping." I smiled at Bree.

"Really? She gives me such a hard time when I try to put her down." She looked at me amazed.

I laughed softly, "I think she's so in love with her room she couldn't wait any longer."

"_Her_ room?" Bree looked confused.

"Lexi was so excited about you guys staying with us, she splurged on a brand new bedroom set for Kali. Your room is the one right next to hers, so you won't have to worry too much about her during the night." He pulled me close to his side, tightening his hand around my waist.

"Oh wow, Lexi, that's so great! I can't believe you did that, thank you so much." She got up to hug me.

"It's really nothing," I nudged Jackson with my shoulder before returning Bree's hug. "Now you _have_ to come visit more." I smiled. "I'll be really sad if I have to look at that empty bedroom all year long." I frowned.

"I _promise_ we'll visit a lot more." Bree laughed, rubbing my back.

"I'm going to hold you to that!" I squeezed her tightly to me. "Bree, do you mind if I talk to Jackson for a minute?" I pulled back from her with a smile.

She looked at him for a second before quickly looking back to me. "Sure, of course!" She excused herself and left the room, quietly shutting the door behind her.

I turned to look at him, and he eyed me warily. "So, she knows?" I asked raising a brow.

He nodded. "The threats may have been directed at you, but he knew her as well. I had to fill her in, Lexi." he explained.

"Of course." I answered nodding my head.

"So," he reached down taking my hands. "Are we going to be ok? Are you still mad at me?" he looked up, his blue eyes searching mine.

"Jax, I was never _mad_ at you. I just…" I thought back to our baby. "I was just trying to be safe." I said softly.

"You _are _safe, baby." He pulled on my hands, holding me firmly against him. I laid my head against his chest, listening to his heart steadily beating. "_Here_ with me. As ironic as that may be." He sighed holding the back of my head with one hand, wrapping his other arm gently around me.

"I know I am, I trust you." I wrapped my arms around his waist.

"You can't leave me, Lexi…"

"I won't."

"Promise me."

"Where am I going to go, Jax?" I looked up at him. "I promise." I sighed, laying my head back down against his chest and closed my eyes.

_We're going to be fine, Angel_. _I promise_.


	15. Chapter 15 - Marry Me

**Chapter 15**

_October 8, 2013_

_Jackson _

It has been two and a half weeks and I haven't received any letters since Bree and Kali got here. Then again, my men haven't been able to locate Brad either. So, my heart wasn't _completely_ at ease, but it will just have to do. The original plan was to ask Lexi to marry me _after_ we have put the situation to rest, but there was no way I could wait any longer. The longer she went without taking my name, the more restless I became.

The ring was finally ready and I was now on my way to go pick it up. On her favorite month and my favorite day, October 8th has finally made its way. I will ask her tonight in front of everyone we know and love to become my wife. I thought I'd be more nervous, but I have never felt more relaxed in my life. Maybe it was the fact that after today, we could finally start planning the rest of our lives together. I was more than ready for this. I can't wait to see her face when I got down on bended knee.

I walked into the Harry Winston Salon and was greeted instantly by Nancy. "Hello, Mr. Anderson! Right on time!" she beamed.

"Hello, again, Nancy." I nodded. "I trust you have kept your word and haven't said a word to anyone?"

"Of course not, Mr. Anderson. I would never!" she answered right away.

"Very good. Thank you, Nancy." I nodded again.

"Hold on one moment, sir. I will be right back with the ring, they did a flawless job. She will love it!" she said smiling, walking away toward the back of the salon.

I nodded. _I hope so_.

She was right, the ring was perfect. Once I left the salon, I headed straight to Harper's. Lexi was busy helping the planners and the caterers set up at her parent's mansion but I still didn't want to risk it. I didn't want her finding the ring on me and Harper agreed to hold onto it for me until she got to the party.

I rang the doorbell and waited patiently for someone to answer the door. Nick opened the door with a smile. "Come on in, man. What's up?"

"Nothing, I'm just here to drop the ring off with Harper. Where is she?" I looked around.

"I'm right here, sorry. I was getting ready." She rushed out of the bedroom with a huge smile. "Let me see, let me see!" she said eagerly, holding her hands out for the box.

I pulled the box from the pocket of my suit jacket and started to hand it over. Her smile grew wider and I quickly pulled it back. "GUARD THIS WITH YOUR LIFE, HARPER!" I said each word slowly.

She placed her hands on her hips and glared at me. "And just what the hell do you think I would do with it?! PAWN IT?! Hand it over, Anderson!" she snapped.

Nick threw his head back laughing. "I can't wait to see the look on her face when she sees the ring. Let me see it, bro!"

I smiled, opening the box for Nick to see. "Holy shit!" he shut the box immediately.

"What? What is it?" I freaked out.

"Too big, not my style." He shrugged.

"Um, FYI, Nick…There is no such thing as _too big_ when it comes to a diamond ring." Harper took a look at her ring and narrowed her eyes at him.

"You're a dick." He pointed at me.

I handed the ring over to Harper. "Countdown to Mission: Lexi Anderson starts _now_." I smiled.

Harper squealed and clapped her hands together excitedly. "I'm so excited I have no idea how I'm going to keep this to myself!"

My eyes widened. "Harper…"

"_But_, I will!" she held her hands up. "Jesus, Jackson…Paranoid much?"

"Much." I glared at her.

"Tonight will be perfect, don't worry." She reassured me.

"I sure hope you're right, Harper." I pulled the front door open. "God knows I have waited long enough." I smiled and walked out the door.

I pulled up to Lexi's family mansion, the place was swarming with cater waiters, chefs, and party planners. I let myself into the house since the door was open already, I didn't have to search long before I found my fiancé to be, she was talking to the planner. I watched as she was talking, animatedly, about the decorations. Her hands were gracefully waving in the air, directing the planner of what else had to be done.

I made my way over before I was rudely intercepted by Bree. "Holy effing shit, Jackson! Where the hell have you been? We can really use your help here!" she placed her hands on her hips.

"Bree, not right now, I was on my way over to say hi to Lexi." I tried walking around her but she just got in my way. "Bree…"

She turned around, "LEXI!" she called out. Lexi turned around to look at us and my heart fell to my stomach, she looked beautiful. "Jackson says hi!" Bree yelled out. Lexi smiled and waved at me. "There, you said hi." She said dryly.

"Bree, are you fucking kidding me?"

"No, bro, I kid you not. We need your help. And we don't have time to watch you kiss the ground Lexi walks on." She smacked me on the back. "Now make yourself useful."

"I thought I was the guest of honor at this party?" I frowned. "Isn't this party Stephen's idea to celebrate me closing the Henderson deal?"

"What's your point, Jackson?"

"Never mind, I guess I don't have one." I grumbled. "What do you need me to do?"

* * *

_Lexi_

_**October 8, 2013 – Letter #33**_

_My Dearest Angel,_

_ I have decided. Today is the day I tell your father…_

_ He's going to be so happy, I just know it._

_ I love you so much, my sweet angel._

* * *

God there was so much to get done and so little time. Where the hell was Jackson? He told me he would only be a minute to run a business errand. I haven't seen him since this morning. It would help me a lot if he were here…he always knew how to ease my nerves. Things were back to being as normal as it was going to get for us the past few weeks, except now I had two bodyguards attached to my hip. Marcus and Damon tailed me everywhere I went, they knew of my every move and knew exactly when I was going to make it. Bree and I didn't complain though, safety was the first thing on both of our minds after all.

Kali was such a joy to have around, I was starting to get way too used to having them around. I really don't know how I'm going to handle them leaving, it's going to be really hard on me. I decided to push those thoughts far back tonight, tonight was about Jackson. I was so proud of him for closing this deal, I convinced daddy to throw this party for him. Which didn't require much convincing, he was very proud of this deal as well.

The actual person I had to convince to come tonight was Kellan, he refused to be here but I begged him. I guess we'll see what good that did tonight. I really do hope he shows up, he deserves to be here, he is part of the firm after all. It made me sad to think of Kellan, I was still not used to not being able to talk to him as freely as I used to anymore. Things were much more awkward now, especially with how Jackson feels about him. I sighed at the thought. Just another thought I will have to push back, _far_ back into my mind.

Leigh Ann, the head party planner, started approaching me right then. She looked sharp in her grey suit and headset, her expression was all business. "Ms. Moore, I would like to go over the layout with you so we know what to put where."

"Yes, of course, let's do that now, Leigh Ann." She nodded once and I walked over to the center of the room so it would be easier to point out everything that had to be done. I started picking and pointing every detail out, I went down a list of things that still needed to be done. Leigh Ann was very attentive, entering all the instructions into her iPad, nodding as I went along.

"LEXI!" I turned around to see Bree with Jackson, and gave them a smile. My heart warmed at the sight of him, he looked beautiful in the tux I laid out for him earlier this morning. "Jackson says hi!" Bree shouted over all the noise. I smiled and waved at Jackson, he looked bothered. I didn't have time to stop what I was doing so I would just have to let Bree take care of him for now. I turned my attention back to Leigh Ann, saying a quick apology I got right back to my instructions.

It was 6:30 now, thirty more minutes before guests would start to arrive. My parents were babysitting Kali during the chaos, Jackson's parents Lynn and Alan showed up early. They made their way over to me, wrapping me in a tight hug.

"It's so good to see you!" I returned their warm greeting. "How was your flight, how are you feeling? Jet lagged at all?" I scrunched my nose.

"No, not at all, we feel good!" Lynn answered with a mega-watt smile. "You look beautiful dear, you look absolutely stunning!" she took a step back to look at my dress.

"Yes, she does." I heard _him_ behind me.

I spun around to face him and he was grinning from ear to ear. We kept crossing paths all day, but we never got a chance to say two words to each other. I didn't get a minute to spend with him at all!

"Jackson! You look so handsome!" Lynn wrapped him in a tight embrace.

"Thank you, mother." He returned her hug and smiled at his father, shaking his hand. "Father." He nodded.

His father patted him firmly on the back. "We are damn proud of you, son! We are both very happy to be here to support you on your big day."

"Thank you." Jackson smiled.

He turned to face me, right when he was about to say something Leigh Ann interrupted us. "Ms. Moore, I need you for just a moment."

"Yes, of course, Leigh Ann. Excuse me, I'm sorry." I excused myself and walked away with Leigh Ann. "Is everything ok?"

"Yes ma'am. I just wanted to notify you that your guests are slowly starting to arrive. Everything is set to where you wanted and we have alerted Mr. and Mrs. Moore. They're making their way down now with Miss Kali."

"Very good, Leigh Ann, thank you so much." I took a look around, everything looked perfect. I had nothing more to add. "Try and enjoy yourself, Leigh Ann. You and your team did an outstanding job." She bowed with a smile and walked away.

I felt a strong hand close around my arm, dragging me away. I looked up to see Jackson weaving us through a bunch of people. "Jax, what are you doing?!"

He ducked us into my father's study. "I haven't gotten a moment alone with you all day," he closed the door behind us. "You look beautiful." He reached out grabbing a handful of the fabric of my dress. "What designer do I thank this time?"

"Zuhair Murad." I answered with a grin. "Do you like the color? It strays from my normal choice." I said looking down, grabbing the rich burgundy colored fabric.

"I love it," he said taking a step closer. "_Especially_ this." he reached up, fingering the plunging neckline of my dress. "And this." He lowered his hand, slipping it through the thigh-high split.

A knock came at the door and Harper popped her head in. "There you are!"

"God dammit, I knew I should have locked that fucking door." he whispered roughly under his breath.

"Come on in, Harper." I giggled, looping my arm in his.

"My god, sweets, you look amazing!" she beamed. "The place is getting pretty packed, your mom was looking for you." She said pointing her thumb behind her toward the party.

"Ok, thank you, Harper." I turned to Jax and squeezed his arm. "I'm sorry." I whispered, kissing his cheek. I walked away and gave Harper's hand a little squeeze as I passed by. "You look beautiful, Harper."

I made my way through the crowd, greeting everyone as I went. I finally made it to my mom who was also greeting the guests. "Mother, you called for me?" I asked.

"Yes, honey, how are you feeling? You weren't feeling too well this morning, I just wanted to make sure you weren't passed out somewhere." She looked at me with growing concern.

I felt really weird all morning. I had mild cramps and felt a little dizzy, but it passed and I felt fine now. "Nothing to worry over, I'm fine, mother." I assured her. I must have just been a little stressed from the party planning.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, mother, I am sure. Where's Kali?"

"She's with Bree. I love that sweet little girl, she is a hoot!" my mother beamed.

"Tell me about it, I don't want them to leave." I frowned.

I heard the room quieting down and I looked up to see why. I saw Jackson standing at the center of the room with James Henderson. James took the mic, tapping into it before speaking. "Hello everyone, I would like to introduce myself. My name is James Henderson, I'm the man making this son of a bitch, rich!" he grabbed Jackson by the shoulder. Everyone around them laughed, clapping. "All jokes aside, I would like to personally thank him for all that he has done for me. I stand here not only as a satisfied client, but also a proud friend. He's a good man, and I ask all of you to raise your glass and join me as I toast to Jackson Anderson." He raised his glass. Jackson raised his glass to James, nodding with a smile.

"Thank you, James." He took the mic. His eyes searched the room for me, when he found me he locked me in. "But, this party serves another purpose. It was a plan to get you all here in one room to witness a very important moment in my life." He walked toward me. "As a _whole lot_ of you may know," he set his champagne glass down on the nearby table and took my hand, kissing the back of my knuckles. "Ms. Lexi Moore and I have been dating for quite some time, and I have loved her for every second of every single one of those days. She has stuck by me through the shit storm that is my life, and put up with the crazy things that came along with me. She has been my rock, she kept me sane, and kept me going. At this point I really can't imagine life without her. It just wouldn't be a life worth living." He let go of my hand and walked over to the dining room, standing by one of the chairs. My eyes never left his as they were filling to the brim with hot tears threatening to spill over at any second.

"I was sitting right here, Lexi," He gripped down on the back of the chair in front of him. "When I first met you, I was sitting right here, when I fell completely under your spell." He smiled at me. "I remembered thinking, 'God, I need to know her, I need to have her or I'll just die.'" He laughed softly, his eyes sparkling with his own tears. "I love you, Lexi Isabelle Moore. With every God damned part of me, I love you. I love you so much it hurts." A tear slid down his cheek.

He turned to face everyone else. "With the whole world at my feet, she taught me I still had a lot to learn, she taught me to view the world in a different way. She taught me to love _normal_, to _want_ normal. I developed a new greed in life, and I set myself a new goal…To settle down, to lay down some roots and to start a family." He turned back to me again. Getting down on bended knee, he pulled out a small black box and opened it revealing a huge diamond ring.

I gasped, and I heard my mother gasp behind me. "Oh my God!" I whispered.

"Lexi, I can't go another day lying to people about who you are to _me_. You are not my _girlfriend_, we are way past that now, don't you think? To me you are so much more than that, you _are_ my wife. I can't go another day with you being Lexi _Moore_. I need you to make a promise to me now, in front of our entire world to witness it here before us. I need you to promise me _forever_. I love you, baby. Marry me."

I don't know when my tears started to fall, but I couldn't seem to stop them from falling. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the box, my hand still over my mouth. "Jax!" I whispered, not knowing what else to say. I looked up to wipe my cheeks, more than prepared to make him his promise. Then I saw him. The hairs on the back of my neck stood, and a chill ran down my spine. "Jackson…" I gasped.

He looked behind his shoulder to see what had me shaken up and he shot up in attention when he saw him. "What the fuck are you doing here?!"

I watched Brad raise his gun, pointing it at Jackson. I didn't think twice before darting in front of him, shielding him. "Jackson, NO!" I heard the gun go off. _Bang!_ I looked up into his eyes, his pale blue eyes looking into mine, wide with horror. _Please let him be ok!_

I felt a sharp stinging pain and I looked down at my chest, I was covered in blood.

_My whole world went black._


	16. Chapter 16 - Prayers

**Chapter 16**

_Prayers – October 8, 2013_

_Jackson_

Everyone stood around us waiting for Lexi's answer. She stood before me in tears, her hands over her mouth staring down at the little open box I held out in front of her. "Jax!" She whispered. She looked past me and her expression fell. "Jackson…" her tone changed to a fearful one. I stood turning around following her gaze.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" I growled.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion then. I watched him raise the gun pointing it at me. His hands were shaking as he placed his finger over the trigger. I was powerless. I was a step closer to my future just a few seconds ago, and it was all about to be stripped away from me, from Lexi…

_Lexi?!_

"Jackson, NO!" She was in front of me in seconds, shielding me. I heard the gun go off and I stood there in shock. Her eyes rolled back and she collapsed into my arms. _No, no, no!_

"Lexi?" I lowered us to the floor, sitting down with her across my lap. "Lexi!" I looked down at my hands to see they were covered with her blood. There was so much blood I had no idea where the wound actually was. I swallowed past the lump in my throat. No, this wasn't happening. "Lexi, baby, wake up." I shook her gently. _Nothing_. "Lexi, NO!" I shouted through tears, hugging her close to me.

"NOOOOOOOO!" I heard Harper wailing, she ripped herself away from Nick and came crouching down next to me. "No, don't you fucking do this to me, Lexi!" she reached out applying pressure to her bullet wound, it was near her left shoulder. Her blood was pouring out she was losing way too much.

I sat in shock I could barely breathe past my sobs. I looked around, for what, I have no idea. Daniel, Marcus and Damon started ushering everyone outside to safety. "SOMEONE FUCKING DO SOMETHING!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.

Bree handed a crying Kali over to Shana and Stephen and came running over, she had tears in her eyes but she remained calm. "Harper, I need you to keep applying pressure to the wound, _don't_ let go of her. Someone already called 911. Whatever you do just keep pressure on that wound."

She nodded at Bree and then returned her attention back to Lexi. "Lexi, what the fuck…" Harper said through gritted teeth. "Please be ok, God, let her be ok!" She continued to do as she was told and kept applying pressure to the wound. I looked down to see her blood pooling around us on the floor, _the bullet must have went right through_. _She was losing_ _way too much_.

I looked around for Brad and found him. He stood in the same exact spot, unmoving, just watching us with a blank expression. _I'm going to fucking kill him! _I started to get up when I felt a firm hand on my shoulder. "Stay with her, she needs you." Kellan said with a menacing look in his eyes. Brad looked up to find Kellan making his way over to him and he slowly tried backing away.

Kellan gripped him by the throat and slammed him to the ground. "You better fucking pray she makes it, you fucking piece of shit!" I watched him punch Brad's face in continuously until his skin started to split, blood splattered across the floor and his face started to turn a nasty shade of purple.

I heard Daniel running back into the mansion with Damon and Marcus and I helplessly watched as they quickly ran over to pull Kellan off of Brad. Even with the three of them, it was hard for them to keep Kellan under control. Brad's body was completely still, making no movements.

His body jerked up a little, and I heard him coughing. Kellan shouted threats, trying to break free of my mens' hold on him. Brad weakly got up on his hands and knees and reached over for his gun, just a few inches away from him on the floor.

"I'll kill you! You fucking bastard, you will pay!" Kellan shouted, tears staining his cheeks.

Brad held the gun to his head, closing his eyes. He opened them again to look at me for just a split second before pulling the trigger. Kellan clenched his jaw tight and snapped his head to the side as Brad's blood splattered across his face. He released deep, uneasy breaths, taking in the sight before him. His eyes were empty and lost, just as mine were.

Just a few minutes ago I proposed to Lexi, right here in this room. _It was just a_ _few fucking minutes ago_. Now this room looked like a gory scene from a movie, a blood bath. This couldn't be real.

I could hear Lexi's mother, Shana, in the background wailing into Stephen's chest. I could hear Kali crying and Bree trying to console her in the other room. I could hear Harper next to me. Crying and praying, praying and crying. Nick tried to take over for her but she didn't move. She refused to leave Lexi's side.

There was so much happening around me, yet I couldn't seem to focus on anything. Everything was such a blur…I couldn't pinpoint my focus on anyone or anything. So I tried asking myself again, '_Is this real?_' It couldn't be.

The paramedics arrived, followed by the police. Someone must have called them the minute they saw what happened. The police started questioning everyone, taking down statements, and I remained where I was, holding Lexi in my arms.

Harper saw one of the paramedics approaching and reached up pulling him down to the floor next to her with one hand, keeping the other firmly in place over Lexi's chest. "Please," she sobbed. "_PLEASE_, you have to help my friend. She's _pregnant!_" Harper begged between sobs.

Then I felt it, I felt myself being jerked back to reality, and I focused in on what she said. I snapped my head to the side to look at Harper. "She's what?!" I choked.

Harper looked at me with pain in her eyes, tears streaming. "She wanted to tell you, she was _going_ to tell you herself. She was just waiting for the right time." She said through tears.

"How far along is she?" one of the paramedics asked as they both took Lexi from me, lifting and laying her gently on the stretcher. I shot up, standing next to the stretcher, running my hands through her hair. _She was pregnant, and I had no idea. _They put an oxygen mask over her mouth and the other one took over for Harper, applying pressure to the blood oozing bullet wound.

"Eight weeks." Harper whispered not looking away from me.

My knees buckled beneath me and I dropped to my knees. _This can not happen to me again, it just can't_.

"Sir, we need to take a look at you."

I looked up. "What?"

"Your arm, sir," The paramedic pointed toward my arm. "We need to take a look at that."

I looked down to see what he was talking about. The bullet that went through Lexi ended up in my arm. I had no idea, I couldn't feel a thing. I shook my head and got up. "I'm fine, I don't feel anything. I need to go with her." I pushed past him.

"Sir, you need to—"

"So do it in the fucking ambulance!" I shouted in his face. "I'm not leaving my wife!"

The man blinked at me in shock. "Yes sir."

I walked back over to the stretcher and took Lexi's hand, following the paramedics out to the ambulance. "You do not get to die today, Lexi. Do you hear me?" I squeezed her hand in mine and jumped into the back of the ambulance.

The puny paramedic I yelled at before took a seat next to me, quickly shutting the door. "We're good back here, let's go!" he shouted to the driver.

I closed my eyes holding her hand in mine, bringing it to my lips and silently prayed. _Please God, if there is a God, do not take her from me. I beg of you, don't. Please, please, please. _I felt the paramedic trying to examine my wound and I snapped my head to glare at him.

"I promise to let you take a look once my wife is in surgery. Right now, I could really care less about my fucking arm! I would saw it off if it would guarantee her life. So, please, leave me the fuck be for now!" I hissed.

"Sir, you're making this really difficult, this is my _job_. I understand that you are upset, the doctors will do what they can to treat her, I promise you. But, for now, you need to let me take a look at that."

I turned my head back to Lexi, kissing her fingers one by one. I reached up and ran my fingers through her hair, memorizing her face. Waiting for her to get out of surgery will be the longest wait of my life. I wanted to memorize everything on her face before then, her eyes, her nose, her lips, her chin, all of it.

The ambulance came to a stop in front of the hospital, the doors opened and I saw a team of doctors and nurses ready to take her in. I never let her hand go as I hopped out and followed them down the hall, jogging with them toward the doors where I knew I wouldn't be able to follow.

They stopped in front of the doors and allowed me a minute to say goodbye before they carted her away.

"Baby, listen to me," I bent over pressing my forehead to hers, keeping my lips close to her ear, and praying she could hear me somehow. "The doctors are going to do what they can to make you better. Now is not the time to be stubborn." A tear slid down my cheek and splashed onto hers, I wiped it away with my thumb. "_You come back to me, do you hear me?_" I said through gritted teeth. "We are getting married the minute this is all over. I don't care if I have to drag you down the aisle kicking and screaming." I kissed her forehead. "I love you, baby. Come back to me." I whispered, kissing her head again. The doctors started walking up when I held my hand up. "Wait." I reached into my pocket and pulled out the ring, sliding it onto her finger. "If this ring is missing by the time she gets out, I'm holding all of you responsible. _Every last one of you_." I threatened. "The ring stays on." They nodded and carted her away. I ran my hands through my hair and watched them disappear with the person most precious to me.

_Please, don't take her from me…_

_Come back to me, Lexi…_

_Please._

I had the hospital put us in a private waiting room. We had too many people waiting to hear about Lexi. We wouldn't be able to wait this out with strangers in the room with us, they were generous enough to accommodate to our needs.

Shana, Stephen, Kellan, Bree, Harper, Nick…I didn't know what to say to any of them. This was all _my_ fault, what am I supposed to say?

Bree came and sat next to me, taking my hand in hers. "Can I get you anything?" she asked rubbing my back.

I held my head up in my hands, shaking my head. "No." I rubbed my face, roughly over and over again. "How long has it been? When do we get a fucking update?!" I got up and started pacing the room.

I walked over to where Shana and Stephen were sitting and took a seat.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered, lacing my fingers together in front of me, leaning forward.

"Don't do that," Shana said shaking her head. "Our girl will be fine, you'll see." She brought the tissue back up to her face, dabbing away the tears. "She's just being stubborn. She'll come out of that surgery as good as new." She said. Stephen tightened his arm around her shoulders. She turned to face me, her eyes red and puffy. "This is not your fault, Jackson. Don't blame yourself for the actions of another man."

I heard the door open and snapped my head up to find the doctor walking inside. We all stood up and rushed over, waiting impatiently for what he had to say. "How is she?" I was the first to ask.

"The bullet passed through when she was shot, which caused a lot less damage compared to what it could have been. It's amazing the bullet didn't pierce any major organs or damage any nerves, but she has lost a _lot_ of blood." He said.

I shook my head before he went on any further, I didn't need to hear all of that. I just needed to know if she was ok. "But, she made it though, right?" I asked impatiently.

"_She_ did."

"And our baby?" I whispered.

"Did not," He shook his head. "I'm very sorry Mr. Anderson. We did everything we could, but there is just so little we could do this early on in the pregnancy when the mother's body undergoes this amount of stress."

Bree walked up next to me and squeezed my hand, crying into my arm. Harper did the same to my other. "I understand," I breathed. "Thank you, doctor."

He nodded, his mouth set in a tight line. He turned and left the room. Nick and Kellan stood behind me and reached up, each squeezing my shoulders, offering their silent support.

"What do I do now?" I asked no one in particular. They all turned to look up at me. "How am I supposed to feel? Someone tell me…_Please._" I whispered. "Am I supposed to be relieved my wife is alive or am I supposed to grieve the loss of my unborn child?"

_Someone please tell me what to do._


	17. Chapter 17 - Broken

**Chapter 17**

_Broken – October 8, 2013_

_Jackson_

I sat next to her bed holding her hand, never leaving her side. I refused to leave so the doctors allowed one other visitor at a time while she was still unconscious from all the medication. I watched as her parents came in one by one, telling her, commanding her, wishing her to get better.

She looked so broken lying on the bed before me. I have never seen her look so weak. How could she have been pregnant for eight weeks without me knowing? God, she must have been so scared. She must have felt so alone and confused, I should have been with her through it. Instead I was busy with work, yet again. How does this keep fucking happening to me?

It was Nick's turn to come in. I watched as he quietly shut the door behind him and sat in the chair next to the bed. His eyes were bloodshot, his face worn. It was definitely strange to see him this way. He has always been the funny one in our group. He cleared his throat and took Lexi's hand in his.

"How are you holding up?" he asked.

"I don't deserve to be here, I don't know what she was thinking, jumping in front of the bullet like that." I shook my head.

"Lexi did what she did because she loves you, Jackson. Don't sit here feeling sorry for yourself. Everyone who knows the two of you together knows how much the both of you love each other. If the gun was pointed at her you would have done the same."

"I didn't even know she was pregnant, I had no fucking clue. What kind of a man is _that_ clueless to the important things happening in his woman's life? Please tell me."

"You're a busy man, we all know that. We don't hold you responsible for this shit. You can't carry that kind of weight on your shoulders, Jackson."

"I would have had time to know if I hadn't been so busy with work all the fucking time." I clenched my jaw shut tightly together, grinding my teeth until I felt an ache. "I can't keep doing this to the women in my life, Nick. I'm stepping away."

"What are you talking about?"

"After I take care of damage control with the media about me taking a huge step back from the company, I'm putting you in charge. I can't keep doing this to her." I shook my head. "I'm going to marry her, and then I'm going to talk her into trying to start a family again. The _right_ way this time." I said kissing her hand. "I'm going to be there for her as much as I can." I brushed my fingers through her hair.

"Jackson, I'm not ready."

"You _are_ ready. You have been doing the job already, and you have been doing a damn good job at it. If anything, you can come to my home for any questions or advice. But, I'm not leaving her anymore." I looked at her frail body resting on the bed, so helpless. "You promised me this when you took the promotion. Are you telling me I placed my bet on the wrong man?" I turned to look at him, my eyes hardening.

"No."

"Then pull your shit together, Nick Johnson. You're about to take on my whole entire company in a few short days." I watched the creeping panic reach his eyes. "Nick, I'm not going anywhere out of the country. I will still be here for you if you need it. But, I just can't be there the way I used to. I am now the man behind the curtain, and you are my successor." He leaned back in his chair with a distant look in his eyes. "The media will pry into your life, so you have to be prepared for that. From what I hear, Harper's a pro. Maybe she can teach you a thing or two. But, trust me when I say you need to find a balance. Work is _work_, Harper _always_ comes first. Remember that, always." I squeezed Lexi's hand in mine. "My problem was that this company was my baby. I created it from the ground up and turned it into what it is now. So, yes, I lost sight of what was important when I was with Ellie and that is why I tried so hard to train you during my time with Lexi." He nodded in understanding. "I know you're ready, Nick. There is no need to be so nervous, you will be fine."

"Thank you, for trusting me this much. I won't let you down."

"I know you won't."

A soft knock came from the door. I got up to answer it, when I opened the door I saw Bree with a man standing close behind her. "Yes?"

"Mr. Anderson, I am detective Peterson." He flashed me his badge. "Can I please speak with you for a moment?"

"Sure. Give me a minute, please." I said pulling Bree into the room.

"Of course." He nodded.

"What the fuck is he doing here?"

"He wants to know what happened to Brad." She answered.

"What have you told him so far?"

"Nothing." She shook her head.

"Ok. Come with me." I instructed her. "You too, Nick." I called out to him. I stepped outside and headed toward our private waiting room. Kellan, Shana and Stephen were waiting inside. "What is this about Detective Peterson? How can I help you?" I said stuffing my hands in my pockets.

"I'm just trying to figure out what happened here today, Mr. Anderson. That is all." He pulled out a notepad and recorder.

"Fair enough." I nodded. "My fiancé's parents held a party in my honor at their mansion today, I proposed to my girlfriend and my ex-employee saw it fit to show up to kill me." he blinked up at me, and started to write everything down. "She jumped in front of me when he shot fire, my friend Kellan here fought him off when he tried to shoot me again." I said seeing his gaze shift to the cuts along Kellan's knuckles. "My men quickly pulled him off before he beat him to death, then Brad Davis got up and shot himself in the head before the police arrived. My guess is he didn't feel like going to jail today."

"Can anyone back this story up?" he asked, continuing to write everything down on his notepad.

I raised my hands up indicating to the few people in the room behind me. "Everyone in here witnessed the incident. You can ask them."

"And the rest of the party, where were they?"

"My men escorted them outside the minute the first shot was fired." I answered. "Brad Davis was asked to leave my company because of a major drug dependency problem, Detective Peterson. He was a troubled young man, with a huge problem. I suggest you further investigate on that." I felt my jaw lock. "Then I would think you wouldn't have so many of the wrong questions." My eyes iced over. "My fiancé was shot today in her _parents' _home, he trespassed onto _their_ property and you have the audacity to stand here before me pointing fingers at me and my family?"

He looked at me with a troubled expression. "I'm just doing my job, sir."

"Now that I have given you answers, I am going to ask you, kindly, to leave. If you create any more trouble, dragging my family into this when they have nothing to do with it, I will make sure you have no job to worry about. Thank you for coming, Detective Peterson. Have a nice rest of your day." I nodded toward the door.

He turned to leave without another word. I turned to look at a very surprised Kellan.

"Kellan. A word?" he nodded and followed me out the door. I walked into Lexi's room and sat back in my spot in the chair next to her. "Sit down, please." I gestured at the chair across from me on her other side and he took a seat.

"Thank you, for lying for me." He said clearing his throat.

"No need to thank me for that. You only did what I wanted so badly to do. Only it would have been a lot harder to explain if it _were_ me. You did me a favor." I shrugged. "Plus, the detective was blowing things way out of proportion. We weren't the ones who killed him. The coward offed himself."

"Still, you didn't have to, but you did." He nodded. "I know how you feel about me, and you didn't have to go out of your way to do that. So, thank you."

"Things were only the way they were between us because of your feelings for Lexi. But, today, knowing what I know about your feelings for her weren't entirely negative. I'm thankful that you care for her as much as you do, and I saw today the lengths you would go to protect her. And yes, you were right, she wasn't safe with me. But, I have no plans to ever let her go. I know that makes me a selfish, piece of shit bastard. But, what will you have me do? She's my person, Kellan. Can you understand that?"

"I do."

"She says it's important that we get along. She needs you in her life. Can you do that for her?"

"I can try." he nodded.

"_Without_ trying to take her from me?" I clarified.

"I make no promises." His mouth quirked up, slightly.

I let out a little laugh, nodding. "I don't blame you." I said, watching Lexi. "I just want to make her happy, Kellan. That's all."

"I don't blame you." He replied. He reached up taking her other hand in his. "I know you love her, I can see it. I will always care for her, and I'm sorry, but I make no apologies for that." A tear slid down his cheek. "But, I respect the relationship you two share, and I promise not to try and come between it again." He said leaning his elbows on top of the mattress. "In time I guess, I _hope_, it will pass." He said with a small smile, kissing the back of her hand. "I'll leave you two alone. Thank you again, Jackson." He got up and reached his hand out to me. I stood and shook it with a smile. "You're a good man." He said walking toward the door. "Treat her right. Don't make me beat you to death." He pointed at me.

I laughed softly, nodding. And then he was out the door.

* * *

_Lexi_

I woke up to a sharp pain in my chest. I groaned, slowly blinking my eyes open. Sunlight was pouring in through the windows. _Where am I?_ I looked down and found Jackson hunched over, his head resting on my hand, clutching tightly.

"Jackson," I whispered. Everything hurt.

He didn't move. He must be sleeping, he couldn't hear me. I couldn't speak louder than that or I would scream from the pain. Instead I wriggled my fingers in his hands. His head stirred a little, he looked down at my hand and then up at me. "Lexi?"

"Baby?" I managed to choke out.

"Yes, what is it? What do you need? Tell me." he got up, running his fingers lightly through my hair.

I shook my head. "No, the baby." I whispered, tears pricking the corners of my eyes. "Is the baby ok?" I knew he knew, we're in a hospital, there was no way they haven't told him yet.

"Lexi," his face grew serious.

"No," I shook my head. "No. The baby is ok, right?"

I watched as his eyes filled with tears, "Lexi, please calm down. You need to rest."

"Jackson, tell me. What happened to the baby?" the pain suddenly didn't feel so bad.

"Baby, you lost a lot of blood…" he whispered, his tears making their way down his cheeks.

My hands shot up to my face, and I shook my head rapidly back and forth. "No, you're lying! What happened, Jackson? What happened?!" I felt numb, this wasn't happening.

"You lost the baby, Lexi. I'm so sorry." I sat myself up on the bed. "Lexi, stop it! You need to rest." He placed his hand gently on my unwounded shoulder.

"No! Get me the doctor I need to talk to him right now." I said pushing his hand off my shoulder.

"Lexi, please…"

"No!" I screamed. "NO!" I pulled the wires from my face and my arms. "YOU'RE LYING! NO!" I screamed again and again, shaking my head.

"Lexi, stop!" he climbed into the bed, sitting behind me. He wrapped me in his arms and leaned over, pushing the button along the wall. "Please, baby, calm down." He pressed his lips against the side of my head. "Please."

I let out a long agonizing scream, trying to push past his strong arms wrapped tightly around me. "No." I whispered again, shaking my head against his chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" he cried with me, holding me close.

_I was broken, utterly broken. My heart was in pieces._

_ It hurt, everything hurt. _

_ My baby, my poor baby…_


	18. Chapter 18 - Angel

**Chapter 18**

_Angel – December 21, 2013_

_Two Months Later…_

_Lexi_

I put the finishing touches on my hair, checked my makeup in the mirror one last time, and smoothed my hands over my dress. I took slow, steady breaths trying to calm my crazy nerves. I shook my hands out and placed one over my heart breathing in and out.

"Ready, baby?"

I turned in my seat and looked up to see Jackson leaning against the door frame. "As I'll ever be," I smiled picking up my bouquet.

"You look beautiful." He said taking my hand.

"Thank you, so do you." I looped my arm in his.

Jackson and I took a deep breath before swinging the doors open to the church. Everyone turned in their seats with a smile and the music started to play as Jackson and I walked down the aisle together. My heartbeat was going crazy fast, why do people stare? I will never understand this.

He turned to face me once we reached the end of the aisle, then grabbed the nape of my neck and planted a light kiss on my forehead before we split to take our place next to Nick on the steps to await the beautiful bride. The wedding march started to play and then I saw her, she looked so beautiful, so flawless. She wore a strapless Vera Wang, and wore it beautifully well. I swear the dress was made for her, she looked absolutely stunning.

I watched her father as he walked his baby girl down the aisle, he looked so proud. I could see Harper crying under her veil, and laughed softly while I watched her try to hide it. I caught her father shed a tear when he lifted her veil to give her a gentle kiss on her forehead before handing her hand over to Nick.

I reached up to wipe the tears from my eyes before it had the chance to fall and ruin my makeup. I looked up to find Jackson staring at me, his brows creased together as he watched me. I shook my head with a smile and turned toward the bride and groom. Harper turned around and handed me her bouquet before taking Nick's hands in hers.

I watched proudly as I saw my sister marry the man of her dreams. I listened to them exchange their vows, heard them swear in front of family in friends to remain loyal and faithful to one another until death did they part. Once the reverend declared them man and wife I clapped, clapped until my hands were red and sore. Endless tears made their way down my cheeks, I whistled and cheered for them, smiling and laughing. I was genuinely happy for the both of them, they truly deserved each other.

Harper turned to embrace me and I hugged her tightly to me. "I'm so very proud of you, Harper. I love you so much." I whispered.

She cried into my shoulder. "I love you too, sweets."

I pulled back holding her face in my hands. "Stop crying, your makeup is running. You look gross."

She laughed pulling me back in for another hug. I watched our married friends make their way down the aisle as husband and wife. Everyone smiled, clapped and cheered for them as they passed them by. They stopped to hug and kiss about a dozen people before finally making it into their limo where they were escorted to the Biltmore Hotel for the reception.

Bree and Kali came running up to me, wrapping me in hugs. "You look beautiful, Auntie Lexi, like Tinkerbell!" Kali said.

That made me laugh, "Like Tinkerbell?!" she nodded. "How so?"

"Your dress is a pretty green color and your hair is up like Tinkerbell's!" she giggled.

"She's right, you look stunning!" Bree said wrapping me in another hug.

"Thank you!" I giggled. "Did you have fun?" I asked Kali.

"No, it was too long." She said crinkling her nose.

I laughed again. "I thought so too!"

Bree's cell phone rang and she stepped aside to answer it which only meant it was work. Another surprise Jackson had prepared for me the night he proposed…Only we never got around to that part. He got Henderson to offer her a position as head of the Peds department in his new hospital here in Miami that she agreed to take. She and Kali were living here in Miami now, which meant I got all the time that I wanted with her.

"Is everything ok?" I asked her when she returned to us.

"Yes, everything is fine. Just a little question from one of my interns." She smiled at Kali. "Ready to head over to the hotel?"

"Yep, I'm just waiting on Jackson." He was talking to one of his men in the design department, Curtis, I think his name was.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to find Kellan smiling down at me. "Kellan!" I smiled, shifting Kali to my other hip and reached up to pull him in for a hug. "Wow, you clean up nice!" I teased.

He leaned in to kiss me on the cheek. "Not so bad yourself, Lex." He laughed and turned to Bree. "Hello again, Bree, how are you?" he smiled.

"I'm good, thank you for asking. How have you been?" she returned his smile. Oh my God, did I just witness a blush?

I kept myself busy with Kali while I gave the two of them a minute to talk. Jackson walked up taking Kali from me. I watched him twirl her in the air, she was giggling uncontrollably, squealing with delight. I laughed at the two of them together but couldn't help but feel a sharp pain in my heart, the same spot in my heart where I kept our little Angel.

Every time I closed my eyes I would try and imagine what he or she would have looked like, who he or she would have grown up to be…After a month of torturing myself with it, I forced myself to flip a switch inside of me. I forced myself to bury him/her within me. I kept a special place in my heart for our baby. Every now and again I would think of our little Angel, but I was careful not to let it consume me completely like it used to.

* * *

_One month ago…_

"Lexi, can we please talk about this?"

"Talk about what, Jackson?" I got up taking the dishes to the sink. I reached up grabbing the sponge, squeezing some detergent onto it and started cleaning the dishes.

"Leave that, Lexi. I'll have Amanda load it into the dishwasher."

"No, it's ok. I want to do them." I said continuing to clean them. I rinsed them off thoroughly and placed them onto the rack by the sink and dried off my hands. "I'm tired, I think I'm going to shower and get to bed." I stood on the tips of my toes and kissed his cheek.

"You haven't properly grieved the loss of our baby since you found out two weeks ago. Please, you're starting to worry me. How are you feeling?" he took my hands in his, searching my eyes for answers.

"I don't know what you're talking about, I'm fine." I said, stroking his cheek.

"Stop lying to me…"

Something inside of me snapped. "Excuse me?"

"Stop _lying_ to me, Lexi."

"_I'm_ lying to _you_? Do you really want to go there right now, Jackson?"

"If it will get you to talk about this, then yes, I do want to go there."

"How dare you!" I pushed against his chest. "How dare you call me a liar?"

"Talk to me, Lexi, just tell me how you're feeling, you _need_ to talk about it. Let me help you." he held my hands against his chest.

"What do you want from me?!" I screamed. "You want me to scream?" I shouted through tears. "Do you want me to cry? You want to know how I feel, Jackson?" I grabbed a plate off the rack and threw it on the ground, then another, and another. It felt good to watch it all shatter against the floor. I continued to throw everything and anything I could find. I felt Jackson wrap his arms around me and I collapsed to the floor, crying in his arms. "I feel like I'm losing my mind, Jackson." I whispered. "Every time I close my eyes, I can picture our baby. What am I supposed to do? What would you like for me to do? What's _normal_ to you? Nothing about this is normal…" I sobbed. "I've carried our baby for eight short weeks, it doesn't seem like a long time to you or anyone else, but it was long enough for me to form a bond with him or her. Our baby was a _part of me_, and my heart aches and breaks every time I think of how I will _never_ be able to hold our baby in my arms, to kiss their eyes, to kiss their lips, or to sing to them while rocking them to sleep. I failed to protect our baby, Jax." I shook my head. "I'm so sorry." I buried my face in my hands.

"Baby, in _no way_ was any of this _your_ fault! Don't say things like that." He gently turned me to face him. "I'm sorry you had to deal with all of this alone, you must have been so scared." He held my head against his chest, softly kissing the top of my head. "I won't let you go through anything like this alone ever again. It won't be like this next time, I promise you."

"Next time?" I pulled away from him, eyes wide.

"We can try again. When you're ready," he grabbed my hands gently in his. "We can try again."

I shook my head. "No." I choked out.

"Lexi…"

"No! I can't, Jackson." I backed away from him.

"Baby, what are you talking about?"

"You want me to go through all of this again? How? How am I supposed to get past the guilt and _try again_?" I cried, shaking my head. "I can't." I whispered.

He cradled my face in his hands. "When the time is right, we _will_ try again." He said slowly. "You can do it, you will see. Just give it time." He leaned in, kissing me softly.

_**Mommy's Final Letter**_

_November 28, 2013_

_My Dearest Angel,_

_ Today is Thanksgiving, but I can't think of one thing I am thankful for today. What could I possibly be thankful for in a world without you in it? I'm so sorry I couldn't do more to protect you, my sweet angel. You will remain with me for as long as I live, nothing and no one will ever be able to fill that void. I will love you and think of you and pray for you for the rest of my days. _

_ It seems fitting now, your nickname. Angel… _

_Please watch over me and your daddy from heaven. _

_I love you so much…_

I clutched the letter close to my heart and cried, and cried, and cried again. I folded the paper neatly, stuffing it into an envelope and carefully placed it into the box with the rest of the letters. I grabbed the satin ribbon and tied it into a bow over the box and stood up from my chair.

Jackson watched as I made my way over to the sliding glass doors and followed me outside into our backyard.

"What are you doing, baby?"

I ran my hand softly across the box, biting my lip to fight the urge to cry all over again. "I wrote letters," I started to say, sniffling. "Every day since I found out I was pregnant. I have been writing letters to give to our baby one day." I wept. He slid his arm around my waist and kissed the side of my head. "But, I don't need them anymore," I shrugged, shaking my head sadly. "So I want to bury them right here." I whispered looking at the spot in front of me in the soft green grass. "Can you help me?"

"Of course I can." He kissed my head again. "Hold on, baby, I'll be right back." I sat down staring at the spot in front of me, clutching the box tightly in my hands.

He returned with a shovel and started to dig a small hole big enough for the box to fit in. I placed my hand over the box and said a little prayer before laying it gently inside.

_I will always remember you, sweet angel._

_ I love you so much…_

Jackson started to cover the hole up again and I sat silently, never looking away from the box. I watched the dirt pile up on it and continued to watch even when it was no longer visible. He sat behind me, holding me in his arms. I had no idea how long we just sat outside staring at the same spot, but Jackson never said a word. He let me grieve in peace, he was as patient and supportive as he could be…Rubbing my arms, kissing my head, whispering supportive things into my ear, but none of it took the pain away.

_How long? How long until this pain subsides?_

_Will it ever?_

* * *

"Lexi?"

I blinked looking up, snapping out of it. "Huh?"

"Where'd you go?"

"Nowhere," I smiled. "I'm sorry, long day." I said shrugging.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked, caressing my cheek.

"Yes, I am! Just give me a second I need to go grab my clutch from the dressing room." I said walking away. I took deep breaths in and out on the way to the room, fanning my eyes. They were rapidly filling and I needed to keep them under control before Jackson finds me and starts flipping out. I clutched my stomach and continued to breathe. _Come on, Lexi, breathe. Just breathe._

I walked out to find Jackson waiting for me with Kali and Bree. I smiled while making my way over. "Let's go!" I said trying to sound as normal as possible. Jackson being Jackson caught on and grabbed my hand, stopping me. He waited until Kali and Bree were out of earshot and then looked back down to me.

"Are you ok?" he asked, softly grazing his thumb along the center of my palm.

_Lie, Lexi_.

"I'm perfect, why?"

He looked at me strangely, skeptically.

_Lie, better!_

I rolled my eyes, "It's a very emotional day for me! My sister just got _married_! Can't I be a _little _emotional?" I tried my best to play off sarcasm.

He sighed pulling me into his arms. "You would tell me if something was wrong, wouldn't you?"

"Of course I would." I lied. "Let's go, I don't want to be too late!" I took his hand smiling and started dragging him along behind me.

We took our seats at our assigned table as soon as we arrived at the reception hall. Bree and Kali took their seats next to us and we immediately fell into a deep conversation. We started discussing Bree's plans for enrolling Kali into preschool this coming year, Kali looked so excited while Bree looked beyond stressed. They haven't really gotten a chance to spend any time apart ever since she took Kali in. I knew she would have the worst case of separation anxiety, but everything will be fine. Kali was so easy to get along with those kids would surely be fighting over who got to be her 'bestest friend'.

We all clapped when Nick and Harper made their grand entrance into the hall, I watched Harper as she made her rounds from table to table with Nick. They shook hands, hugged, and kissed just about everyone in this room before they got to our table. We all stood when we saw them making their way over. I watched Jackson and Nick hugging it out, Jackson was congratulating him and wishing him well.

Jackson gifted the newly married couple two weeks in Hawaii for their honeymoon. I pitched the idea since he wouldn't have come up with it himself, because this two week vacation he was gifting to them meant he had to fill in for Nick at the company. He was reluctant at first, but I convinced him that Nick was a valuable member of the team and that he deserved an appropriate honeymoon with his new wife. I remembered Harper's reaction to his generous gift, she almost passed out.

_I'm going to miss her. I'm going to miss everyone._

"Baby, are you ok?" I felt Jackson behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"Yes, of course, I'm fine. I'm just really happy for them." I touched his hand with a smile.

"Dance with me." he held out his hand. I smiled at him, taking it, and let him lead me out to the middle of the dance floor. I giggled as he playfully spun me around. He softly chuckled pulling me close to him. "Marry me." he whispered.

"I already gave you an answer to that question." I said giggling again.

"No. _Marry me_, Lexi. Why are we waiting this long?" his brows creased together.

"I _will_ marry you, Jax." I looked up into his worry filled eyes. "I just need some time." I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Why does it matter when?"

"It matters to _me_. It feels weird, I tell everyone you're my wife, but I feel like I'm lying because we have yet to make it official." He sighed. "Why are you putting this off? Everything will remain the same. We're practically married _now._" He sounded frustrated then he looked down at me with a look I couldn't explain. "Do I have anything to worry about, Lexi?"

"No." I felt the tears stinging my eyes. "No, you don't." I whispered leaning my head down into his chest.


	19. Chapter 19 - Heal

**Chapter 19**

_Heal – December 23, 2013_

_Jackson_

"Are you sure you'll be ok by yourself?" I turned around, again, for the thousandth time this morning. I was having the hardest time leaving the house. I _really _didn't want to leave her here.

"For the love of God, Jackson, I will be _fine_. Honest!" she held up her right hand.

I had a weird feeling this morning and I couldn't shake it off. I had no idea what it was about, but it was enough for me to want to stay. "I just…" I reached down and took her hand in mine. "I have a bad feeling, and I really don't want to leave you here."

"Like what? I'm fine, I will be fine." She looked up at me and saw the worry written all over my eyes and reached up to cup my cheek. "Everything will be fine," she said softly. "Now, go make your millions, Mr. Anderson." She winked.

I leaned in grabbing the nape of her neck, pulling her to me and kissed her. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

_That was different._ I looked down into her eyes, my brows creasing together. She shook her head as if she were snapping herself out of it and back to attention.

"_Most_. I love you most, Jax." She leaned up giving me a quick peck on the lips. She pushed me toward the door laughing softly. "_Now, Go!_"

There's that feeling again, that same weird feeling I have been having all morning. She has been really distracted this morning, different, _distant_.

_What the hell is going on?_

_Why am I feeling this way?_

I took one last look at her before walking out the door. "Bye, baby, I'll see you soon."

She nodded and blew me a kiss.

* * *

_Lexi_

I watched the love of my life walk out the door. A single tear escaped me, sliding down my cheek. I choked back a sob as I reached up to wipe it away.

"_Goodbye, Jax…"_ I whispered in the now empty room. I clutched my chest tightly and collapsed onto the bed.

* * *

_Jackson_

Daniel pulled up the driveway and I noticed Lexi's car was missing.

_Weird._ _She must have gone to the store._

I walked in through the front door and toward our bedroom. Once I got inside, I shut the door behind me and started to loosen my tie when something caught my eye. I saw an envelope with my name written across it sitting on the bedside table. My heartbeat picked up the closer I got to the envelope. I picked it up and started to read.

_My dearest Jackson,_

_Where do I even start? _

_Before I say anything at all, I need you to know that I love you, I love you so much. But, I can't stay here any longer. Being here is slowly killing me inside, and I can't hide it anymore. None of what happened is your fault, so please don't misunderstand what I'm doing for something else entirely._

_I need time. _

_This isn't goodbye, I just need time._

_ I am not going to include where I'm going in this letter, I know that you will just come after me to bring me back here and I just can't handle all of this anymore. At least not right now. I will be back, I promise you. Just trust me when I say I need time to heal. I know what you must be thinking, and I know you'd prefer me to stay here with you, to heal with you. But, that's the problem, Jax. It has been two months and I just haven't been getting any better. _

_ I don't know how much time I will need. All I do know is that I will be back for you. I know it's selfish to ask, but please wait for me…_

My hands were shaking as I set the letter down on the bed. I walked out to the living room and grabbed my keys. I didn't know what to make of the letter, I was so confused. This had to be some sort of weird joke she was playing, she was always one to joke, but this wasn't fucking funny. She wasn't going to include where she was going in the letter? What is that supposed to mean exactly? Did she leave Miami?

_What the fuck?_

I felt dizzy I didn't know what to think. What the hell was going on? Everything was fine this morning. I quickly climbed into the car and set out for her condo. _Please, let her be there_. I don't know how fast I was driving but I managed to get there in fifteen minutes. I didn't bother turning off or parking the car, I jumped out and ran into her building.

"Mr. Anderson?"

I spun around to see Walter heading toward me. He was part of the security team for the building, maybe he has seen her. "Walter, have you seen Lexi tonight?" the words rushed out of me into what sounded like one big word.

"No sir, but she did tell me there would be a chance you would come by tonight. She isn't here, sir. I saw her with a suitcase when she left."

I shook my head taking a step back, "No, you're lying." I whispered, my heart gripping with pain. "I would like to see for myself. Let me into her condo, Walter." My breathing grew rapid, and my chest rose and fell with each breath I took. I saw that he was about to object so I grabbed him by the collar of his jacket. "Let . Me . In . Walter." I said each word slowly. Another guard got up and headed toward Walter but he held out his hand, indicating it was alright.

"Ok, Mr. Anderson," he nodded grabbing his keys. "Follow me, sir." I loosened my grip and took a step back so he could lead the way. I followed him to the elevators and we both got in. Once we got to her floor he unlocked the door and let me in. "I'll wait out here, Mr. Anderson. Take your time."

"Thank you, Walter." I nodded and walked inside to her dark condo. "Lexi? Baby, are you here?" I called out.

_Nothing_.

I felt the panic creeping up and swallowed past the lump forming in my throat. "Baby?" I walked around turning on the lights and headed into her bedroom.

_Again, nothing._

Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and I headed into her closet. Half of it was empty, she was really gone. I ran a hand roughly through my hair and tried to think.

_Where the hell could she have gone?_

I pulled out my phone and dialed Lexi.

_Please pick up. Pick up, pick up, pick up, Lexi!_

"Hello?"

"Lexi!" I gripped the phone in my hands.

"Jax…" her voice was weak, I could barely hear her.

"What the fuck, Lexi? This isn't funny, what the hell are you doing?"

"I'm leaving, Jax."

"Leaving where?!" I roared. She was silent. "Let me come with you, baby." My voice was shaking.

"No." she whispered.

"Why are you doing this?" I choked out.

"I need to get better before I can continue to be with you, Jax."

"What does that mean? I don't understand!" I shook my head, this couldn't be happening. _Why_ was this happening? "_Please!_ Baby, what did I do?"

I heard her starting to cry, "Nothing, baby, you did nothing."

"Then why are you doing this?!" I felt the tears flooding my eyes, burning, making their way freely down my cheeks.

"I just can't take being here anymore, I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm afraid of what I may do if I continue to stay here." She said through tears. "I _need_ time to heal, that's all. I will be back, I _promise_, Jax. I _promise_."

"What am I supposed to do here without you, Lexi? Huh?" I couldn't keep my emotions under control, I was about to lose it.

"I'm sorry, Jax. I have to go, I love you." She whispered.

"Lexi, don't hang up! DON'T!" I begged but there was no use, the line went silent and she was gone. I let out a scream and threw my phone against the wall.

* * *

_Lexi_

_June 19, 2014_

It has been six months since I have been out here in Los Angeles. I haven't kept contact with anyone, not even Harper. The minute I arrived I powered my Miami cellphone off and purchased a new phone I would be using out here. I knew if I heard Jackson's voice again I would come running back to him, I almost did when we had our last conversation.

I have been keeping busy with a new job I was lucky to have found as an event planner and coordinator. Just last week I was approached by someone in runway fashion who loved the work I did for an afterparty for one of their shows that she wanted me on her team as a fashion show coordinator. It sounded like a dream, but I had to turn it down. Being away from Miami helped a lot, but I realized it was time for me to return home soon. I missed everyone, I missed Jackson most of all.

I tried to steer clear of any articles on Jackson, I didn't want anything to tempt me or cause me to stray from my plans to heal out here in LA. The only person I did keep in contact with was Bree. I have been staying at her apartment while I have been out here, Jackson had no idea. I explained to her why I was doing what I was doing and how important it was that she kept quiet of my plans. She wasn't exactly thrilled about my plans but understood why I had to get away which was why she offered her apartment in the first place.

I powered my Miami cellphone on and it instantly flooded with emails, texts, missed calls, and voicemails. My heart started to race as I fought the urge to sit there opening every one of them. I dialed Harper instead. She picked up on the second ring.

"Lexi?" she whispered in shock.

"Harp…" my eyes instantly filled with tears.

"What the fuck?! Where the hell have you been, Lexi?!" she started to cry.

"I don't want to talk about me, how have you been, Harper?" I wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Jackson has been going crazy here looking for you!" she ignored my question and wishes to stray from the subject of me.

I sat quietly, I didn't know what to ask, and I didn't know what to say.

"He's not looking good, Lexi. You _need_ to come back!" she begged.

"What do you mean?"

"You _need _to come back. He isn't himself, I'm worried about him. Please come back, Lexi." She urged.

"I'm sorry Harper. I just really wanted to hear your voice. I'm coming back soon, I promise. I'll call you back later to let you know when." I didn't give her the chance to answer before hanging up the phone.

It was really hard listening to her voice I can't imagine how much harder it's going to be to hear Jackson's. I took a deep breath in and released it as I dialed Jackson's number.

"Hello? Jackson Anderson's phone." a woman's voice came from the other side.

I gasped. "Um, is Jackson there?"

"Thank you, Amanda." I heard her whisper. I felt like I was choking. _She was in his home?!_ "No, I'm sorry he's unavailable at the moment. Can I take a message?"

"Who is it?" I heard Jackson in the background. _Unavailable?_

"No, no message. Thank you." I clicked off.

My face felt like it was on fire. I got up and headed into the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face. My cellphone started to ring and I looked down at the caller ID to see it was Jackson. My heart started to flood with rage and I powered it off.

I walked over to the computer and pulled up any and all articles that had to do with Jackson from the past six months. Tons of articles flooded my screen as I pulled up article after article I realized the first dozen were of him dealing with my absence during the first few months.

The articles starting from last month was what caught my eye. He was seen on several different occasions with a woman, he was shielding her from the paparazzi in most of the photos. I swallowed past the huge lump forming in my throat and forced myself to read the article titled _Spotted: Jackson Anderson with a new brunette beauty! Where is Lexi Moore? _Halfway through the article I shut the lid on my laptop. I can't read anymore, I've read enough.

_He seems fine to me…_

So much for returning home…

_What_ home? I have nothing to return to now.

I pulled out my LA cellphone and dialed Elizabeth's office.

"Hello, Elizabeth Presley's office. How can I help you?"

"Hey, Bethany, it's me, Lexi. Can I please speak with Elizabeth? It's about her job offer."

"Lexi, yes of course, hold for Elizabeth!" she quickly patched me through.

"Elizabeth Presley."

"Elizabeth! It's Lexi Moore. I'm so sorry I don't know what I was thinking! I would be honored to accept your job offer, if it's still available?" I asked sounding hopeful.

"Of course it is, Lexi. What changed your mind, I thought you were looking forward to returning to Miami?"

"I just realized there's nothing to return to. I'm happy here, and I know I would excel at this job. Thank you for taking a chance on me, Elizabeth." I swallowed back my tears.

"I'm just happy to hear you have changed your mind. Be here early tomorrow morning, we need to discuss Saturday's show!"

"I will be there first thing! Thank you again, Elizabeth." I hung up the phone.

_I guess I was wrong to think he would wait…_

_Don't cry…_

Of course I'm crying, how could I not? I knew it was a longshot, asking him to wait. Does it make me a fool to think he actually would have?

_I really, really thought he would…_


	20. Chapter 20 - Show Time

**Chapter 20**

_Show Time – June 20, 2014_

_Lexi_

Once I arrived at the building I was quickly rushed into HR to sign a bunch of stuff and had to take a photo for a security badge for the building. They escorted me to the elevator and told me to take the elevator to the 20th floor. The doors shut closed encasing me in the elevator. I looked down at my badge, twirling it around in my fingers. This is it, this was really it. My life is in LA now…

My mind wandered back to Jackson. How could it have only taken him six months to move on, I don't understand. He wanted to marry me, and he told me I was everything to him. We had just lost our baby, I just don't understand. I told him I would come back for him. So _why_, why would he do this? I know I hurt him by leaving, I know how betrayed he must have felt, and I know this was partly my fault. But, he must have known how much I loved him, and love him _still_. I hated that I still loved him, his betrayal cut me deeply, but it doesn't change the fact that I will always love Jackson.

I shook my head, clearing it of useless thoughts. I have a new career to worry about, and I don't have time to think about this anymore. It's done and over with, I need to try and move along with my life the way Jackson did with his. The doors opened to the 20th floor and I was greeted by Bethany.

"Good morning, Lexi! Welcome to _Runway_!" Bethany beamed, standing from her desk.

"Good morning, Bethany." I smiled. "Thank you for the warm welcome."

She nodded. "Elizabeth is waiting for you in her office, go right in!"

"Thank you." I nodded. I knocked before walking in. "Elizabeth?"

"Yes, dear, come on in!" she looked up from her desk with a wide smile. "Ah, Lexi…" she stood up with her arms outstretched toward me. "Hello, gorgeous!"

"Good morning, Elizabeth." I walked up giving her a small hug and she greeted me warmly, kissing both my cheeks.

"Good morning, doll. So happy you could join our team! Please," she directed toward the sofa in front of her. "Have a seat!"

I obeyed, taking my seat. I let out a deep breath, nervously, and crossed my hands over my lap. "Thank you for giving me the chance to reconsider your offer. That was hugely generous of you, Elizabeth."

"Nonsense, I wasn't about to let you go that easy anyways." She winked at me. "Now, about tomorrow's show…How do you feel?"

"Well, I've taken on big events while working the event coordinator gig, so it shouldn't be a total shock. I will give it all I have, I assure you. I won't let you down." I said with a smile.

"Oh, I know you won't, Lexi. I have high hopes for you. Taking on this job means a _lot_, Lexi. I trust that you are aware of that?"

"Yes, of course! I am open to anything and everything, I am pretty flexible, no worries!"

"Great!" she clapped her hands together. "Now, let's get down to discussing the details to tomorrow's show! Shall we?"

"Yes, by all means. I'm all ears!" I scooted along the sofa so I could get a closer look at the layout.

"The show tomorrow will be held at the Kodak Theater, it's for a high end lingerie company called _Lush_. The designer is a dear friend of mine, so the show should be a lot of fun. It's also the perfect first show for you to start because you're dressing the models to the bare minimum, you're not piling on layers, so it should definitely be a lot less stressful compared to our _couture _fashion shows." I nodded, listening intently to each word. After hours of discussing what my job for tomorrow will be, what we had to do to get the models runway ready, and everything that was expected of me, what I should expect, etc. We decided to bring the meeting to an end.

"So, what do you think? Doable?" she asked me.

"Seems like a lot of fun, I really can't wait! Thank you again for taking a leap of faith in me, Elizabeth."

"Lexi, call me Liz." She lightly tapped my hand.

I nodded with a smile. "Liz."

"Perfect, can't wait to see you in action tomorrow! Get well rested tonight, we have a long day ahead of us." She warned. "Noon tomorrow, see you then."

"Yes ma'am," I stood up with a smile. "I will be here."

A knock came from the door and we turned to see a tall, dark haired man walk through the door. He was _handsome_. He looked at me with a confused expression. "New model, Liz?" he looked at Liz for answers.

She laughed and shook her head. "You would think," she ran her hands up and down in the air along my body, appraising me. "She's our newest team member, our runway fashion show coordinator. But, silly me, where are my manners?! Caleb meet Lexi. Lexi this is Caleb, He's the agent for our models here at _Runway_." She leaned in to whisper, "And he's got more money than God himself." I widened my eyes at her and she snickered.

Caleb walked up extending his hand out to mine. "Caleb Carlisle, it's a pleasure to meet you Lexi…" he lingered for a last name.

"Moore, Lexi Moore." I shook his hand with a smile. "Pleasure's all mine." I turned to Liz. "Thank you again, Liz. I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Sure thing, sweetie." She nodded with a smile.

I walked out of the room and headed for the elevators. I pushed the call button and waited patiently, twirling the badge in my fingers again.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I heard a voice from beside me. I yelped, jumping at the sound of his voice. Caleb laughed holding his hand up. "My apologies, I didn't mean to startle you."

"It's ok," I whispered, clutching my chest. "To be fair, I startle easy." I said with a little laugh.

He looked down at my hand. "You're engaged?"

I immediately looked down at my ring and tilted my head to the side. "No." I said without thinking. "It's just an old ring." I said hiding my hand.

"Just an old Harry Winston engagement ring?" he asked amused.

"I don't like to talk about it."

"Fair enough." He said nodding. The doors to the elevators opened and he held out his hand. "After you." He said with a smile.

We rode the way down in silence. "Were you not in the room for a meeting with Liz?" I asked curiously.

He thought about what I asked for a moment and smiled. "Yes, yes I _was_." He nodded.

"Short meeting." I frowned.

"Well it got cut short."

I nodded, the elevator arrived at the lobby and the doors opened. I walked out toward the garage and unlocked the doors to my Mercedes.

"It was very nice meeting you, Ms. Moore. I look forward to seeing you tomorrow." He said from the doors to the building.

It was my turn to be confused. "Were you not leaving?"

He shook his head. "Like I said, I have a meeting with Liz."

"So…"

"So, I don't let a lady walk down to her car alone." He clarified.

I laughed nodding. "Ah, what a charmer you are, Mr. Carlisle." I said getting into my car.

_That was weird._

I pulled out of my parking space and waved to him before driving off and he waved back with a smile. I looked in the rearview mirror to see him still standing there. I laughed softly to myself.

_No fucking way is this happening to me right now_.

* * *

_June 21, 2014_

The next morning passed by in a crazy haze. We were all shuffling around getting ready for the show, pulling pieces together, labelling the pieces, checking and rechecking sizes, going through the binder full of models, fittings, taking polaroids of the models during the fittings, directing the stage decorators. I think making a list of things _not_ to do would have been shorter. I didn't have time to pause to breathe we were _so_ busy. I made sure not to slow down and power through, I didn't want Elizabeth to stress out.

Elizabeth was pleased with my compliance, she told me to take a break but I politely declined, saying I'd rather help. I wanted her to be impressed with her decision to hire me last minute. Sure we were busy but I was actually having a lot of fun and it kept my mind off of Jackson. I needed the distraction, so technically _she_ was doing _me _the favor here.

"Alright everyone, it's close to show time!" Elizabeth shouted over all of the noise. "Everything looks great, you all did a splendid job!" she said with a smile. "I need all of you to be on your 'A' game today, _NO MISTAKES!_ Please!" she clasped her hands together in a mock praying motion. Everyone laughed and nodded in compliance. She looked over at me, "Lexi, I need you to come with me to hair and makeup. We need to get ready."

"Ready?" I asked confused. "I'll be backstage the whole time, is this not ok?" I looked down at my outfit. I was wearing a blouse and skirt.

"No, dear," she said shaking her head. "You will be walking the red carpet with me before the show. You're the new fashion show coordinator here at _Runway_, we have a lot of questions to answer, mini interviews to cooperate in. You'll be busy before the show, and you need to be camera ready!"

"Elizabeth, I have nothing to wear!" I was starting to freak out.

"Caleb sent a few things over, you will be fine, Lexi." She reassured me with a smile.

"Caleb? Why would Caleb send me anything?"

"Lexi, he's an _agent_. He's always two steps ahead of everyone. He had his team pull a few strings to make sure we were ready for tonight. It was part of our meeting yesterday." She took my hand, pulling me along with her. "We have no time to lose, come, darling!"

She pulled me into a room I could only have guessed to be hair and makeup. There was already a team of people waiting for us. A group took me and another took her sitting us both in chairs in front of huge vanity mirrors. They moved really fast, with ease and grace, the time crunch didn't phase them at all as they moved hastily through the process.

By the time they finished with my hair they threw me into an ice blue, goddess style gown. "Elizabeth, this dress is beautiful. Who's the designer?"

"Australian designer Carla Zampatti, gorgeous isn't it?" she ran her hand along the fabric of the dress. "Alright Lexi, are you ready to make your LA debut?"

I felt like I had the wind knocked right out of me. Interviews…I didn't even like to have my picture taken whenever I went anywhere with Jackson, but an interview?

Elizabeth sensed my tension and grabbed a hold of my hand. "The trick is to _not_ think too much about it," she chuckled. "Just answer any questions they have for you and then you're done. It's as simple as that." She squeezed my hand encouragingly. "Now, let's go, we're already running a little behind!" she pulled on my hand, leading me out of the room.

My head was spinning as I let her lead me outside to wear the reporters and cameramen would be. I looked down and realized that I was still wearing my ring. I gasped and hurriedly took it off, slipping it into my clutch.

Elizabeth walked me to my first interviewer and slipped away to answer a few questions with another reporter a few feet from mine. "Hello, Ms. Moore. You look beautiful this evening, who are you wearing?" the reporter asked.

"Hello," I smiled. "I'm wearing Carla Zampatti, she's an Australian designer." _There, that wasn't so hard._

"It's absolutely stunning! Congratulations on your new job with _Runway_!" she smiled. "How did you come across the job?"

"Well, I was working as an event coordinator at first and was booked an afterparty gig for _Runway_ which led to my meeting Ms. Elizabeth Presley. She has been so generous and kind." I nodded with a smile.

Someone came up behind me to lead me to another reporter. "Thank you so much, Ms. Moore."

"Of course, thank you for coming." I smiled, it hurt to smile this much.

I was placed in front of a male reporter. "Good evening, Ms. Moore." He greeted with a smile.

"Good evening, how are you?" I smiled.

"I'm doing just fine, can't wait for what you guys have planned for us tonight! You look wonderful!" he beamed.

"Oh, you're too sweet, thank you very much!" I laughed softly.

"Once I found out Lexi Moore was coming to team _Runway_, I have been dying to ask," I raised my brows in question to his question. "Where is Jackson Anderson this evening? You have been MIA from MIA, care to spill the beans? You guys are always rocking the rumor boat, and the most recent rumor is you two split. So tell us. Are you or aren't you?" he pointed the mic under me.

I had no words I was rendered speechless by this puny little man. I wanted to shove the mic away from me but decided to treat the situation as graciously as I possibly could. Right before I opened my mouth to speak I felt a hand on my elbow. "That's enough of that, Ryder." Caleb stepped in next to me. "If you don't mind, I'd like to snag my date for the night from under your microscope." His eyes were like ice as they were fixed on the reporter.

"I'm not…" I pointed next to me toward Caleb and shook my head at Ryder. "I'm not!" I said a little louder, starting to panic. I saw him writing something down. "Please don't write that down!" Caleb started to lead me down the carpet and I glared at him. "What the hell do you think you're doing? I hardly know you!" I snapped.

"I was saving your from answering any unwanted questions, Ms. Moore. Or I thought I was. I'm sorry if I overstepped any lines while doing so, that was not my intention." He looked to me apologetically.

"Thank you for your concern, but it's ok. I can take care of myself. I don't need to be saved." I walked away frustrated with the current situation. I just realized that it's just a matter of time before Jackson finds out where I am. With our without Caleb's help, I did my first interview already and I'm sure it will print somewhere on some magazine that will somehow land in Jackson's hands. It's ok…It's going to be alright, what the hell did I care?

Elizabeth walked up to me. "Everything ok, Lexi?" she looked at me with growing concern.

I nodded. "Yes, everything is fine." I smiled reassuringly.

Elizabeth asked Bethany for the time. "It's show time, let's go, Lexi!" she took my hand leading me back inside.

I felt at ease again, we were back inside where it was safe. I let out a deep breath, sighing in relief as I slipped my headphones on. There was something about being in control that kept me calm. I watched Elizabeth slip her headphones over her ears and she turned to give me a thumbs up. I returned it with a smile and followed her backstage.

I was in charge of keeping the models in order, making sure they made it out to the stage in a timely manner after they were dressed and primped from the interns. My heart raced with excitement as I heard the music starting over the speakers. New job, new city, new life…I repeated those words silently to myself in my head as we all prepped to start.

"Alright people we start in 3, 2..." Elizabeth pointed to me and I sent out our first model.

Everything looked perfect so far, each model was prepped perfectly, they were all standing in order and ready to go, I sent them all out one by one. Everything was falling perfectly into place.

The first theme segment ended perfectly without any surprises. "Ok, people, theme two!" Elizabeth shouted. Everyone backstage started hustling while they got the next batch of models ready for the second theme. The first batch of models started running to the other side of the tent to get changed for the third theme. _Good, perfect! _I was mentally counting and checking, recounting and rechecking. Everything looked great so far. Second theme again went without a hitch.

We continued the cycle until we got to the last theme. I heard someone cursing over the headphones. "Kylie is down. I repeat. Kylie is down. She will _not_ be able to make the final walk." _WHAT?!_

"WHAT?!" Elizabeth voiced my thoughts. We both ran to the other side of the tent to see what had happened.

The designer joined us as we stood staring at a curled up Kylie on the floor. "What the hell happened here?" the designer asked, panicked.

"She was running to this side of the tent for her wardrobe change when she rolled her ankle." The intern notified us.

"Oh my fucking God, I'm going to scream." The designer clutched her throat.

"Wait!" Elizabeth raised her hand to her forehead trying to think of a solution. "We keep spare models for stuff like this. So bring one!" she looked around.

"All the other segments called for ten models at a time, this one calls for eleven. The spare model is already fitted for the tenth piece and Kylie was supposed to get dressed into the finishing piece." I saw beads of sweat forming along the intern's forehead.

"You guys hired _no _other spare models?! Are you _KIDDING ME_?!" Elizabeth hissed.

The intern winced and took a step back. "None in her size, Mrs. Presley." She answered softly.

"Oh my God," Elizabeth's hands shot up to her cheeks, she looked around scanning the entire room and her eyes landed on me. "You." She pointed at me.

"Me?" I pointed at myself.

"You and Kylie are almost a perfect fit. Put this on her, _NOW!_" Elizabeth instructed the intern.

"Wait, Elizabeth! Please!" I shook my head.

"Lexi, you told me you were ready to take on _anything_. This is my _anything_."

"Yes, I meant anything like sewing, planning, coordinating, primping, or prepping! NOT modelling! Please, Elizabeth! I can't!"

"Lexi, get dressed NOW! This show will be ruined if you don't."

_Oh God, Oh God, Oh God!_

I followed the interns and stood where the instructed me to, unmoving, as they all tore at my clothes undressing me, slipping the finale piece on me. They pulled out my ponytail and ruffled my hair around until they got it exactly how they wanted it. I have never felt so exposed in my life. This felt like a horrible nightmare I couldn't wake from. In just a few seconds I will be standing in front of thousands in just my underwear.

The interns rushed me back over to the other side of the tent. I took a step up onto the mini staircase to the stage and stopped for last minute lip gloss.

"You'll be fine, Lexi. You look beautiful. Just remember to smile, think sexy, you already look the part!"

I had no idea what to do. _Please, God, don't let me fall._

"Alright Lexi, 3, 2, 1 GO!" Elizabeth directed.

I took a deep breath walking out onto the stage and onto the runway. _Just fixate on one part of the room, it's like junior pageants all over again, you're fine. _I looked straight ahead at the back of the room with a smile on my face. I tried not to think too much about my walk, and tried to think of nothing at all. Oh god, this thing on my back was so heavy! The designer loved to work with props during her shows, and I was wearing what felt like fifty pound wings! Once I got to the end of the runway I did what I remembered seeing the other models do, I stood posing from one foot to the other. I felt about a ton of different flashes go off before turning back around with a smile, heading back. _It's almost over, thank God! _I finally reached the end and ducked backstage.

Elizabeth rushed over to hug me. "Thank you so much, I can't believe it, you were wonderful, darling!" She squeezed me tight. "How did that feel?!"

Not all bad actually. "_Surprisingly_ good!" I answered with a smile. It was exciting to try something new, something un-me.

"You're a natural, Lexi! Now go, you need to go take the final walk with the designer and the rest of the models."

"Do these have to stay on?" I pointed at the wings.

"No, honey, let me take that off of you." She answered with a laugh. I felt so much lighter, _wow_, what a difference that made. "Ok, _now_ you can go!" she smiled.

I followed the rest of the models out onto the runway for our final walk. We all smiled and clapped for our designer as she made her way down the aisle of models. I couldn't believe the amount of fun I was having! This was all insane, but in a good way, of course.

_It just hurt not being able to share it with Jackson…_


	21. Chapter 21 - Caught

**Chapter 21**

_Caught – June 20, 2013_

_Jackson_

"I need this meeting moved over to Tuesday and Tuesday's meeting moved over to Thursday. Henderson needs these documents sent to him right away, I need them signed ASAP." Mia nodded, entering all the information into her iPad. I started going through my work emails, my inbox was flooded with them. My head was killing me, I really need to take a break, but every time I take a minute to myself I started to think of Lexi. The last time I sat down and thought of her I nearly went insane, so in order to avoid that happening again, I buried myself in work.

My cell phone rang from the living room.

"Go answer that, please, Mia." She nodded exiting the room.

"Hello? Jackson Anderson's phone." I heard Mia answer. "Thank you, Amanda." I heard her whisper. "No, I'm sorry he's unavailable at the moment. Can I take a message?"

I don't get business calls through my cellphone, and the ones that I do get are already saved under my contacts. Who could be calling me? I walked into the living room. "Who is it?" I asked.

She frowned looking down at the phone. "The number wasn't saved under your contacts. It was a woman, she didn't leave a message." She handed me the cellphone.

I looked down at the screen and recognized the number instantly. "This is Lexi's number, why is this number not saved under my contacts?" I was furious.

"I…I did program her number. I was sure I did!" she looked confused.

I turned right around heading into my study and I quickly dialed her number back. _If only I had gotten up to answer the phone myself._ The call was cut short and sent to voicemail, she ignored my call. I tried her again. This time it went straight to voicemail. She powered it off again. _GOD FUCKING DAMN IT! "_MIA!" I roared, heading back into the living room. She jumped when she heard my voice booming through the room.

"Yes, Mr. Anderson."

"Tell me _exactly_ what she said." I snapped.

"She asked if you were here, and I told her you were unavailable at the moment, I offered to take a message. She said no and hung up right after that, sir. I am so, so sorry, Mr. Anderson. I could have sworn I saved her number."

"You either did or you didn't, and you clearly didn't, Mia!" I shouted throwing the phone across the room. It hit the wall shattering into pieces as it hit the floor.

"JACKSON MICHAEL ANDERSON!" Bree's voice cut clear across the room. Kali started to cry, burying her face into Bree's hip.

"Baby, I'm sorry." I walked over to Kali, but she just ran away from me. I watched her run into her room, shutting the door behind her.

"What the hell is the matter with you?!" Bree snapped. "How many phones is that now? I lost count after ten!"

"Lexi just called me." I watched as Bree's face drained of color.

"And? What happened?"

"That's the thing, I missed her call. Mia never programmed her number into my phone when I got this new one. I just missed my chance to speak with her and I have no idea when she will decide to ever call me back again. She powered it off already." I fisted my hair in my hands out of frustration. "I'm losing it, Bree. I have no idea where the fuck she is."

"Jackson, Mia_ did_ program her number into your cellphone. Apologize to her right now."

"The number wasn't saved when she called, Bree."

"I will explain that. But first, you need to apologize to Mia." She nodded toward Mia, I turned to see her face was red and I could tell she was trying her hardest not to cry.

"My apologies Mia." I turned back around to face Bree. "Explain."

"Follow me." she turned leading us both back into my study. She closed the door and walked further in toward the center of the room. "I'm the one who deleted Lexi's number from your phone, Jackson."

"_WHAT?!_" I shouted. "Why the fuck would you do something like that?!"

"How many holes have you punched through the walls of this house? How many windows have you shattered? How many tables, bookshelves, and desks have you kicked to pieces? How many phones have you been through in the past six months? This obsession with finding her is driving you crazy, Jackson. You needed to take a step back, you needed a _break_. I wanted you to let _her_ come to _you_ when she was good and ready. But, every time you had a minute to yourself you would try to call her phone again and again, _knowing_ she wouldn't pick up and then your tantrums would begin all over again and _we're_ the ones who have to weather Hurricane Jackson. _We_ are the ones who have to clean up after your mess!" she wiped the falling tear from her cheek. "I miss her too, we all do. You're not the only one she walked out on, sure you are the one most affected by this and I'm sorry, I am. But, this isn't healthy anymore."

"I _need _to find her, Bree…" I shook my head. "You have no idea what this feels like." I whispered. "I feel _empty_. Do you know how that feels, Bree? Do you know how scary it is to feel _this_ alone?" she opened her mouth to say something. "You _don't_." I cut in. "You have Kali. I _had_ Lexi. But now she's gone and I can't find her. Don't pretend to know what I'm feeling. Do me a favor and stop trying to _help_ me unless it's something to _actually_ help me." My eyes filled with tears. "You just cost me a conversation with Lexi. How are you going to make up for that? That conversation could have given me a sliver of hope, it could have helped carry me through for the next month. But you _took_ that from me."

"I was just doing what was best for you, Jackson." She said softly.

I scoffed backing away slowly. "Just don't. _Lexi_ is what's best for me. I will continue to find her, don't try and stop me anymore, Bree. I mean it." I turned toward the door. "Excuse me, I need to go apologize to my niece." I walked out the door and headed upstairs to Kali's room.

I knocked softly on the door and opened it to find Kali at the corner of her bed, hugging her teddy bear that Lexi gifted to her tightly to her chest. "Can I come in, princess?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "If you promise not to yell." She said looking up at me.

"Kali, I would never yell at you. I didn't mean for you to walk in on that. Uncle Jack is an idiot. I'm sorry, baby." I bent down to kiss the top of her head and took a seat next to her.

"Why are you so mad all the time, Uncle Jack? You were never like that before."

"I just miss Aunt Lexi, that's all." I patted her head and held my breath, forcing my tears away.

"I miss her too." She said sadly, petting her teddy bear. "That's why I give Teddy big hugs. I pretend he's Aunt Lexi, and then I feel better." She said with a smile. "Wanna try?"

"Can I?" I asked with a smile, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.

"Yuh huh," She nodded. "Here let me show you." She said standing on the bed, placing Teddy in my arms. "You need to wrap your arms around him," I did as I was told. "Now lean your cheek on the top of his head." Again, I did as I was told. "Squeeze tight Uncle Jack, it has to equal how much you miss Aunt Lexi." She said with a smile. I squeezed with everything I had, looking up at my innocent little niece. She giggled. "Wow! You must miss her tons!" she said jumping on the bed.

"I do." I whispered, smiling at Kali. "Thank you, Kali. You were right, I do feel better."

She walked up to me, framing my face with her little hands. "Don't be so sad, Uncle Jack. I will tell you a secret, if you smile." I smiled and she leaned in holding a finger over her lips. "Shhh, this is a secret." I nodded. "Aunt Lexi will be back, she told me so.

I straightened up and looked at her, eyes wide. "What?"

"But, if you're sad, then she will be sad. So smile, I want everyone to smile when Aunt Lexi gets back."

"Kali, what are you talking about? Have you talked to Aunt Lexi?"

"Yep! She calls mommy's phone all the time!" she smiled up at me.

My heart dropped down to my stomach. "When? How long ago?"

"Umm…I think a few days ago? A week ago? I don't know Uncle Jack, I'm four years old!" she said placing her hands on her hips.

"Thank you, Kali. I will let you play with your toys now. I need to go talk to mommy. Stay here, ok?"

She nodded with a smile. "Whenever you get sad again, I will let you borrow Teddy. She held him up by the arm."

"Thank you, princess." I kissed the top of her head and practically ran out the door. I took the stairs two steps at a time and found Bree at the breakfast bar talking to Amanda and Mia. "Come with me." I grabbed her by the arm and dragged her back into the study.

"Jackson, let go, you're hurting me!" she wriggled her arm free when we walked into my study.

"HOW LONG?!" I shouted.

"What are you talking about, Jackson?!"

"How long have you been speaking to Lexi behind my back, Bree?! STOP WITH THE LIES, I want the _truth_."

Her eyes widened in shock and she opened her mouth but couldn't manage to form words. "How did…"

"Kali slipped. That's the thing about children, Bree. They're pure, _innocent_, they don't know how to lie!" I have never felt so betrayed in my life. "How could you do this to me?" I whispered. "You watched me for months trying to do everything I could to find her. You watched me drink myself to sleep every night, heard me waking up from nightmares every night…How could you do this? What would possess you to help keep her away? After _everything_ I have done for you!" I shouted and she jumped. "Where is she, Bree?"

She shook her head. "I can't…"

"WHERE IS SHE?!" I roared, gripping her by her arms.

"Jackson, please! You're hurting me!" she screamed through tears.

"Tell me where she is, Bree, or so help me God…"

"You'll what?!" she screamed. "What, Jackson?!" she pushed me. "You have no idea what she went through after she lost that baby! You don't understand the amount of stress a woman goes through during a miscarriage. She needed an out and I gave her one. If she stayed here any longer I have no idea what she would have done to herself. Losing a baby isn't like losing your purse Jackson. It affected her entire world, she was _beyond_ devastated. She needed time to heal, that's all she asked of you. You owe it to her to give her the space she needs!"

"I have given her six months of space. If I give her any more there's no telling what _I _will do. Now tell me, Bree. _Where is she_?"

"I'm the only one who knows where she is. Why do you think that is, Jackson?"

"LA? She's in LA?" she nodded once. "Jesus fucking Christ, Bree!" I released my grip on her arms and started to pace. "You watched me search all over Miami for months, and then you watched me search all over Florida when you _knew_ she has been in California all this time? Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell is the matter with you both?! Did you guys really think I'd just give up on her?!"

"We never bet on that. We were just hoping you would respect her wishes to deal with this alone before she felt she could deal with being here again."

"I LOST HIM TOO!" I shouted. "I lost _our_ baby too!" I said through gritted teeth. "Just because I was late to find out doesn't mean I loved him or her any less. I would have loved that baby with everything I had and you fucking know it!" I cried. "Who are _you_ to side with her on being alone?! She needs me just as much as I need her. Letting her cope alone is the equivalent to giving up in my book, and giving up on Lexi was never an option for me!" I took a deep breath in and then released it, calming myself down. "Mia!" I shouted from where I stood. I turned back to Bree. "I will find her with our without your help. This search would be a lot faster if you cooperated with me. I know that she's staying in your apartment, what else can you tell me in helping find her faster? I would rather not wait by the apartment all day."

"Yes, Mr. Anderson?" she answered, walking into the room.

"Are you going to tell me or not, Bree?" I asked impatiently.

"She's staying at my apartment, and last I heard she was working for Portia Clarke as an event coordinator in LA." She whispered.

"Mia, make the necessary travel arrangements for me to get to LA as soon as possible, have a car pick me up at the airport when I arrive. Call Portia Clarke's office to check if Lexi's employment information is correct, find out where she is and where she will be the minute I arrive. I'm not waiting another minute to see her." I couldn't tear my eyes away from Bree. "I can't believe you, I don't know if I will ever forgive you for this, Bree."

"What are you going to do, Jackson?"

"I'm going to LA. I'm going to find her. And I'm bringing her home." I answered coldly.

_I'm not leaving LA without her. I don't care how long it takes me._


End file.
